Yes, it's been forver, but I was in one of those huge writing moods, so here's the next chapter. It's not really long, but I liked it. Hope you all like it, too 
!!!
Oh, and it's kind of sad, but most of this fic is
Chapter 4
I dug my toe into the sand underneath the swing. I pulled my other leg up, and tucked it underneath my body. I knew my parents were watching me closely- making sure I was all right. I could feel their protective eyes on me when turning every corner. Privacy was no longer present in my life. To be twenty one, and to feel that feeling was horrible and definitely unwanted.
I ignored their constant glances; instead, focused on a stray piece of string on my purple sweater that hung limply on my thinning frame. I had nothing better to do with my time. These days I always felt so…sad. The only word I can actually think of to describe how I’ve been feeling over the past couple of weeks. So much regret and resentment filled my body, with no outlet for it escape. Whatever, I didn’t care anymore. Let it fill my body. Let it take me over.
While silently complaining to myself I heard approaching footsteps from the right. I didn’t look up. I didn’t have the energy or desire to. There wasn’t too much that interested me anymore. The bench swing that I was on moved when the person sat next to me. Still, I didn’t look to see who the person was. I just continued looking sadly down at my lap. I sighed deeply, trying to block out the emotions I was feeling. I felt someone’s hand tucking back the hair that hung in front of my face behind my ear. I recognized the feel of Vaughn’s hand against my skin, but I still kept quiet. For him to understand how I was feeling no words had to be passed between us. He just knew.
I hated this! Hated that I felt like this. Hated that this is what my life had amounted to. I hated that I could no longer gain the independence that I craved so desperately. I couldn’t be myself. My normal self had disappeared somewhere deep within me. I would do anything to get it back, but she was already buried far too deep inside. I wanted to be Sydney Bristow again! A small, unwanted sob escaped my lips. Vaughn obviously hearing it pulled me onto his lap: me resting my head on his leg, with him comfortingly stroking my hair. Through my blurred vision I could see my mom tearing up behind the glass of the kitchen window; watching us. To see her once strong and joyful daughter turn into frail and shattered girl must have been heart wrenching for any mother to watch.
I closed my eyes to block out the world around me, trying to focus on the happy thoughts that once surrounded me. Eventually I was able to calm myself down, and get a hold of my ever so raging emotions. I wiped my tear stained face with the sleeve of my sweater, and turned on the back of my head so I was looking up at Vaughn. Still, no words were passed between the two of us. I stared at his face, trying to memorize every inch of it, fearing one day it wouldn’t be there. I knew I was getting no better. Nobody said anything about it, but I knew it was true. They didn’t want to get my hopes any lower than they already were. I could feel the sickness inside myself, though. I knew it. Nobody had to confirm it for me. I could see it Vaughn’s face, too. I knew he tried hiding it for me, but he couldn’t; just like I couldn’t.
I reached for his hand, and took it in my cold one. Again I could feel the tears coming. I didn’t try to hold them back. The fear of leaving this world and the people in it was enough to make me sob, and I really didn’t care who knew it. I took our entwined hands and placed them on my stomach.
“Don’t leave me, okay?” I whispered, struggling with each word.
I saw Vaughn’s face contort with anguish, and one single tear fall from his eye. He gathered my frail body into his arms; an easy task because of the weight I was losing.
“I don’t want to go anywhere, Vaughn. I don’t want to leave you!”
“Syd, I promise you’re not going anywhere.”
“That’s not something you can promise,” I whispered.
He didn’t answer. He knew it was true.
Neither of us moved, for fear of losing the other. I held tighter as night began to settle in. The stars were beginning to peek out behind the night sky, and the moon was starting to create a ghostly glow across the pond next to us. I shivered when the wind picked up slightly. It was still very warm considering it was summer, but I was freezing.
“Syd, we should go inside. You’re cold,” he said knowing me.
“Just a couple more minutes.”
He didn’t move. I sighed, wishing this moment could be categorized in a time period where I wasn’t sick. It couldn’t.
“Come on,” he said, shifting slightly when I shivered once again. I didn’t protest, knowing he was right.
He stood up first, and then helped me stand. He would walk right next to me with his hand across my back, and his other hand tightly holding my hand. This is how we walked everywhere now. I felt so hopeless in my own skin. When my mom saw us approaching she slid back the glass door for us to come in the house.
“Dinner will be ready soon,” she told us, naturally assuming Vaughn would be staying.
“All right,” he said.
“Sydney, honey, are you alright?” she asked, touching my arm in a motherly way.
“I’m fine, mom,” I said as patiently as possible, knowing she was just being understandably protective.
Vaughn led me past her into the living room, where he sat me down on the sofa. He turned around to go back into the kitchen.
“Where are you going?” I asked, confused.
“To ask your mom if she needs any help in the kitchen.”
“Don’t go. She’s fine,” I said.
He immediately listened, understanding I needed him with me more than my mom did.
He sat next to me, as I took the same position as when we were on the swing. I closed my eyes, not wanting to talk; just sit. The sound of the door opening caused me to open my eyes, though. My dad stood in the doorway, looking at us. Usually he would automatically tell us that we were sitting too close, and we always had to move. This time; however, he didn’t say anything. I could see he disapproved in his eyes, but surprisingly I could also see sympathy. He walked past us without a word and into the kitchen. I could hear my parents in the kitchen talking in hushed voices.
“Now, there’s a first,” Vaughn said with a slight laugh.
I smiled, and nodded my head. I was too tired to talk, so I simply closed my eyes. Five minutes later, though, I was forced to move over to the dinner table. Dinner was a nightmare. I was never hungry. I had lost my appetite along with the function of my kidneys. I always tried to eat as much as possible. I didn’t want to hurt my mom’s feeling. She would put so much thought into meals, while trying to stay within the limits of my new diet.
Vaughn pulled out my chair for me, and made sure I was sitting comfortably before sitting himself. Dinner was a fairly silent affair. The occasional question was shared, but other than that there was barely any conversation circulating around the table. I had managed to eat a couple green beans, but I really wasn’t hungry at all.
“Sydney, don’t you want anything else?” my mom asked, when I put down my knife and fork, indicating I was done. There was still a full plate of food left on my plate.
“I’m not hungry,” I mumbled.
“Oh, alright,” she said, looking down at her plate.
The table was silent once again. It drove me crazy.
“You guys can talk, you know?” Still, nobody said anything.
“I’m not glass! I’m not going to shatter!”
They were all looking at me, trying to think of something to say, but still; nothing.
“HELLO? I’m not dead, yet!”
I threw my napkin down and ran from the table. I heard my mom let out a sob, and heard Vaughn chase after me.
For being as weak as I felt I sure could run fast if I wanted to. I threw myself onto my bed: sitting Indian style, hugging myself. Calmly Vaughn walked into the room. He sat on the edge of the bed, and simply said, “you can’t do that to her.”
“I know,” I said, knowing there was no other answer. I rested my head against his shoulder.
“Will you stay with me tonight?”
“Of course.”
