Chapter One
But First, a message from our sponsors: This is a humorous fic (hopefully!) with the intention of making you laugh. And while these beloved characters are trapped up they gain a better understanding of each other. Sorta. Maybe. Okay, not really, but they should be. During this commercial break, I would like to stress that I do not own the characters of ALIAS, as much as I would like to…get ride of that pesky little Vaughn. However, that won’t be happening here, as I would be murdered by the masses of S/V shippers on AA. Sorry guys! Now back to our regular programming.
*ding* Sydney’s doorbell. She was wearing a long black dress. It was plain, but it hung over her figure to amazing effect. She was wearing hanging earrings, and her hair was curled and done up. She looked beautiful…more than beautiful. She looked, wow, she looked, resplendent. She took his breath away. Will walked into the room arm-in-arm with *real* Francie, and rolled his eyes at Vaughn. He could at least wipe the drool off his chin while he was ogling their best friend. How inconsiderate. Will rolled his eyes again for good measure. Vaughn took a look at Francie, and his jaw dropped further (if that was possible). Francie had also done her hair up, but she was wearing a much longer dress, and hers was pine green. The ‘diamond’ studs in her ears glittering in the light. Wow. It didn’t take much work to make Francie look this good. Will got a little jealous, and told Vaughn to shut his mouth and get out of the way. Both men were dressed in suits with ties. Will’s was blue, and brought out his brilliant sky blue eyes. Vaughn’s was red, and made him look like he had either spilled wine on himself, or had been bleeding. They headed to the restaurant in Sydney’s blue ‘Ford Focus’ (zoom in on logo here, just in case you didn’t see the cars name.)
***
Jack and Irina had been at the table waiting for the four of them, when Sloane walked in. "Look at this!" For whatever reason, he was looking very excited.
If Will was there, he would have rolled his eyes. Twice. For good measure. But he wasn’t. So back to Sloane. He had placed a strange glowing sphere on the table (okay, how boring, I know, sorry.)
"What do you want Arvin?" asked Irina coolly.
"You have to take a look at this! It’s my latest Rambaldi artefact! It’s quite conditional, but If somebody at the table is forty-seven, and four people site down at the table to make seven, then they will be transported to wherever the forty-seven year old thinks of first! Isn’t that cool?"
Jack thought that he would throw up when he heard Arvin use the word cool. In fact, he nearly did, but then he saw Sydney’s blue ‘Ford Focus’ coming down the road.
"If you will excuse me Arvin, Irina, I need to use the bathroom before the rest get here."
"Of course honey"
"Happy forty-seventh Birthday, Irina." Said Sloane, smirking.
"No Arvin, take it away. Come on—oh look, it’s , Kendall and Dr. Barnett! We’re over here!" They walked over to where Irina was making a scene, and drew up their chairs and sat down. Right then, at that exactly precise moment, Syd, Vaughn, Will and Francie walked in. Spotting Irina right away, they walked over. The group looked very nice in their formal-wear. All the men in suits, the women all *dress*ed up.
"Hi mom! Happy Birthday!" Sydney gave her mom a kiss on the cheek, and sat down. So did Will, Francie and Vaughn, all within the given forty-seven seconds.
*whoosh* Jack walked out of the bathroom, and looked at Arvin, who had a stupid grin on his face.
"Where is Irina?" Jack raised an eyebrow at Sloane.
"I don’t know, wherever she thought of first, I guess." He shrugged, and continued to grin stupidly.
"I don’t believe you." Jack did not raise his voice, but instead rolled his eyes. "Irina and I are both forty-seven, and both subject to your stupid Rambaldi devices. What are the odds?"
Sloane’s smirk broadened into a smile. "The odds are actually one in forty-seven."
Jack glared at him coldly. "So, when do we get them back?"
"When they get here."
"Or when we get there."
"Jack—?"
"Arvin. We are going to find my wife. When do you think Dixon, Marshall, Sark, Allison and Weiss, will be arriving?"
"I’m not sure but—Jack, that’s only six people."
"No, we have seven. You are coming with us."
"Lucky for us, they didn’t take the orb with them."
"Lucky for you five other people are supposed to be meeting us here".
Jack looked around for the remaining members of their party.
A/N: Please tell me what you think of this. Anything you have to say is valuable and helps me grow as an author. And stuff. Oh, and this occurs after everyone has been brainwashed into forgetting they hate eachother, and I don’t know if Jack and Irina are both forty-seven, but they are now! Oh, they are also married, but I suppose you noticed that when Jack reffered to Irina as his wife.
But First, a message from our sponsors: This is a humorous fic (hopefully!) with the intention of making you laugh. And while these beloved characters are trapped up they gain a better understanding of each other. Sorta. Maybe. Okay, not really, but they should be. During this commercial break, I would like to stress that I do not own the characters of ALIAS, as much as I would like to…get ride of that pesky little Vaughn. However, that won’t be happening here, as I would be murdered by the masses of S/V shippers on AA. Sorry guys! Now back to our regular programming.
*ding* Sydney’s doorbell. She was wearing a long black dress. It was plain, but it hung over her figure to amazing effect. She was wearing hanging earrings, and her hair was curled and done up. She looked beautiful…more than beautiful. She looked, wow, she looked, resplendent. She took his breath away. Will walked into the room arm-in-arm with *real* Francie, and rolled his eyes at Vaughn. He could at least wipe the drool off his chin while he was ogling their best friend. How inconsiderate. Will rolled his eyes again for good measure. Vaughn took a look at Francie, and his jaw dropped further (if that was possible). Francie had also done her hair up, but she was wearing a much longer dress, and hers was pine green. The ‘diamond’ studs in her ears glittering in the light. Wow. It didn’t take much work to make Francie look this good. Will got a little jealous, and told Vaughn to shut his mouth and get out of the way. Both men were dressed in suits with ties. Will’s was blue, and brought out his brilliant sky blue eyes. Vaughn’s was red, and made him look like he had either spilled wine on himself, or had been bleeding. They headed to the restaurant in Sydney’s blue ‘Ford Focus’ (zoom in on logo here, just in case you didn’t see the cars name.)
***
Jack and Irina had been at the table waiting for the four of them, when Sloane walked in. "Look at this!" For whatever reason, he was looking very excited.
If Will was there, he would have rolled his eyes. Twice. For good measure. But he wasn’t. So back to Sloane. He had placed a strange glowing sphere on the table (okay, how boring, I know, sorry.)
"What do you want Arvin?" asked Irina coolly.
"You have to take a look at this! It’s my latest Rambaldi artefact! It’s quite conditional, but If somebody at the table is forty-seven, and four people site down at the table to make seven, then they will be transported to wherever the forty-seven year old thinks of first! Isn’t that cool?"
Jack thought that he would throw up when he heard Arvin use the word cool. In fact, he nearly did, but then he saw Sydney’s blue ‘Ford Focus’ coming down the road.
"If you will excuse me Arvin, Irina, I need to use the bathroom before the rest get here."
"Of course honey"
"Happy forty-seventh Birthday, Irina." Said Sloane, smirking.
"No Arvin, take it away. Come on—oh look, it’s , Kendall and Dr. Barnett! We’re over here!" They walked over to where Irina was making a scene, and drew up their chairs and sat down. Right then, at that exactly precise moment, Syd, Vaughn, Will and Francie walked in. Spotting Irina right away, they walked over. The group looked very nice in their formal-wear. All the men in suits, the women all *dress*ed up.
"Hi mom! Happy Birthday!" Sydney gave her mom a kiss on the cheek, and sat down. So did Will, Francie and Vaughn, all within the given forty-seven seconds.
*whoosh* Jack walked out of the bathroom, and looked at Arvin, who had a stupid grin on his face.
"Where is Irina?" Jack raised an eyebrow at Sloane.
"I don’t know, wherever she thought of first, I guess." He shrugged, and continued to grin stupidly.
"I don’t believe you." Jack did not raise his voice, but instead rolled his eyes. "Irina and I are both forty-seven, and both subject to your stupid Rambaldi devices. What are the odds?"
Sloane’s smirk broadened into a smile. "The odds are actually one in forty-seven."
Jack glared at him coldly. "So, when do we get them back?"
"When they get here."
"Or when we get there."
"Jack—?"
"Arvin. We are going to find my wife. When do you think Dixon, Marshall, Sark, Allison and Weiss, will be arriving?"
"I’m not sure but—Jack, that’s only six people."
"No, we have seven. You are coming with us."
"Lucky for us, they didn’t take the orb with them."
"Lucky for you five other people are supposed to be meeting us here".
Jack looked around for the remaining members of their party.
A/N: Please tell me what you think of this. Anything you have to say is valuable and helps me grow as an author. And stuff. Oh, and this occurs after everyone has been brainwashed into forgetting they hate eachother, and I don’t know if Jack and Irina are both forty-seven, but they are now! Oh, they are also married, but I suppose you noticed that when Jack reffered to Irina as his wife.
