winter_snow
Cadet
Title: Crystal Windows
Author: Jen aka winter_snow
Rating: PG-13 to R
Summary: This is an AU fic. The timeline is post-resurrection. And yeah, that was a horrible summary I know. Got any suggestions? Email or PM me.
Disclaimer: Don’t own any of it. They belong to other people which I which I wish I could meet.
A/N: This may seem confusing at first but I promise that it’ll make sense soon. And in my world, stuff has happened differently. (e.g. someone not taking back someone)
I actually don’t know how many parts this will have… probably only 3 or 4? Have no idea, what so ever.
Oh and BTW, this is my first fic… I would love some constructive criticism (so please review)!
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
Part 1. Reminiscing
I don’t know whether he truly loved me or not but it was the times I was with him I was truly happy. He would comfort me when I needed it, nurse me back to health when I was sick, entertain me like crazy when I was bored but most of all, he would just be a friend. A real friend. I didn’t have many of those. There was Francie. She was innocent and she ended up dying because of me. And Will. He was still in witness protection. Again, it was all because of me.
I started crying. I asked myself, why do I cry? Have I not experienced enough pain all these years? The answer I always come back to is no.
Life. What is life? I often thought to myself that it was a place of misery, not joy, pain, not love, sadness, not happiness and last but not least, hell, not heaven. It wasn’t until I met my dead fiancé Daniel Hecht. He would show me that life could be of joy, love, happiness and even heaven. That man died years ago and I found myself reverting back to what my opinion of life was.
Into my life, came packs of lies. Lies to what I do, where I am, who I am and how the hell I really was feeling. That was a price to pay when I joined the SD-6 and the CIA. There in the CIA, was the man I shared many great memories with. Michael Vaughn. At first I thought he truly loved me, loved me more than life even. But I was wrong. So horribly, f***ing wrong.
I disappeared for two years. He married a double-crossing lying, cheating blonde and afterwards when he found out that she really was all those lovely ‘qualities’ what did he do? He came back to me. Think I was a fool? Hell no. I told him to get a life and leave but did he? The answer is yes. There was no hesitation in his eyes to leave. Pathetic. He never loved me enough to keep strong and faithful. (A/N: I don’t hate Vaughn. And in this fic, Vaughn left Sydney alone, because he decided he wasn’t good enough for her.)
I met another man. I can say for sure that he is the ‘great love of my life’. I met him a long time ago and foolishly thought he was out to destroy me. All he wanted was to know me, and possibly, love me.
Four years. (Note: I actually dont know the timeline... lol, im just assuming its that.) It took me four years to know he wasn’t some bulls*** artist and was telling the truth the whole time after all these years. He was the one person who didn’t lie to me and didn’t do stupid actions as other people did, ‘for my own good’. I love him, wholly, inside out, top to bottom, you name it.
That man. He is lying here in my arms. Dead.
Blood spills onto my clean white blouse. Or not so clean and white anymore blouse. I don’t care at all. All I can think about is betrayal.
I feel as if he has betrayed me. Hell, he gave up his life without a fight. How could he leave me behind so easily? I trusted him with my heart and soul. I had enough trust problems as it was. After all, didn’t I find out my Father was the biggest Control-Freak of all time?
When I went to Wittenberg and found those documents about my life, my sister’s, I was mortified. When my father entered, he just looked at me like nothing was wrong. He didn’t make any attempts to apologise. I felt like saying: ‘Do they teach you to apologise in spy school? ‘Cause you suck at it.’ and just stomp out of the place, Erin Brockovich style. But no, I broke down in tears showing how utterly weak I really was. Me, Sydney Bristow, ex-double agent, super-spy extraordinaire, broke down at the most inappropriate time. Eventually I gathered up my emotions and ran the hell out of that place and hid. Hid from the world, everyone, including myself.
An hour after I left Wittenburg, the most impossible thing happened. My father was in a car accident. He died two hours later. I couldn’t believe it- I refused to believe it. Jonathan D. Bristow, also ex-double agent, super-spy extraordinaire, died from a simple car accident. A freaking car accident. I felt myself, breaking down once more. Even though he had hurt me so badly, he was still my father.
I was the last person on the planet to know. It really felt like that.
The next morning as I walked through the doors of the JTF building, everyone was staring at me, but avoided talking to me. The lady at the front desk nervously told me that Dixon wanted me in his office now.
I sat down on a chair in his office. He babbled on and on. At the time I wished he would have just stopped wasting my time and tell me what the hell was wrong. In the end he did and I remember doing a good job of running and crying that day.
I even remember the man currently lying in my arms, offering his condolences. At the time he was the most arrogant prick if truth be known. He even knew about my father’s business-slash-interference in my life. At first I was going to bash the living daylights out of him, but fear not, my emotions got the better of me. Again. I broke down and cried yet again.
Though I had experienced the worst pain I had ever felt in my entire life so far on that day, that night- was the best night of my f***ed up life. We made the most passionate love I had ever experienced.
I learned to love him. One day I accidentally blurted out that I did. Loved him that was. He looked at me and smiled. Though he didn’t say anything back, I was content.
I hear the front door of my apartment open. It brings me back to the stupid thing called reality.
Footsteps come towards me in a rhythmic beat.
Suddenly, noise makes me nauseous. Maybe it was also from the sight of blood; so much blood.
Instead of throwing up all my insides, I lost consciousness as I feel myself being picked up. The last thing I remember was staring into a familiar face.
A/N2: Just a reminder that this fic is a work in progress (WIP) … sorry to say, I don’t have much time these days to update it, but I should be able to update in about 3 weeks or something… schools over then!
Author: Jen aka winter_snow
Rating: PG-13 to R
Summary: This is an AU fic. The timeline is post-resurrection. And yeah, that was a horrible summary I know. Got any suggestions? Email or PM me.
Disclaimer: Don’t own any of it. They belong to other people which I which I wish I could meet.
A/N: This may seem confusing at first but I promise that it’ll make sense soon. And in my world, stuff has happened differently. (e.g. someone not taking back someone)
I actually don’t know how many parts this will have… probably only 3 or 4? Have no idea, what so ever.
Oh and BTW, this is my first fic… I would love some constructive criticism (so please review)!
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
Part 1. Reminiscing
I don’t know whether he truly loved me or not but it was the times I was with him I was truly happy. He would comfort me when I needed it, nurse me back to health when I was sick, entertain me like crazy when I was bored but most of all, he would just be a friend. A real friend. I didn’t have many of those. There was Francie. She was innocent and she ended up dying because of me. And Will. He was still in witness protection. Again, it was all because of me.
I started crying. I asked myself, why do I cry? Have I not experienced enough pain all these years? The answer I always come back to is no.
Life. What is life? I often thought to myself that it was a place of misery, not joy, pain, not love, sadness, not happiness and last but not least, hell, not heaven. It wasn’t until I met my dead fiancé Daniel Hecht. He would show me that life could be of joy, love, happiness and even heaven. That man died years ago and I found myself reverting back to what my opinion of life was.
Into my life, came packs of lies. Lies to what I do, where I am, who I am and how the hell I really was feeling. That was a price to pay when I joined the SD-6 and the CIA. There in the CIA, was the man I shared many great memories with. Michael Vaughn. At first I thought he truly loved me, loved me more than life even. But I was wrong. So horribly, f***ing wrong.
I disappeared for two years. He married a double-crossing lying, cheating blonde and afterwards when he found out that she really was all those lovely ‘qualities’ what did he do? He came back to me. Think I was a fool? Hell no. I told him to get a life and leave but did he? The answer is yes. There was no hesitation in his eyes to leave. Pathetic. He never loved me enough to keep strong and faithful. (A/N: I don’t hate Vaughn. And in this fic, Vaughn left Sydney alone, because he decided he wasn’t good enough for her.)
I met another man. I can say for sure that he is the ‘great love of my life’. I met him a long time ago and foolishly thought he was out to destroy me. All he wanted was to know me, and possibly, love me.
Four years. (Note: I actually dont know the timeline... lol, im just assuming its that.) It took me four years to know he wasn’t some bulls*** artist and was telling the truth the whole time after all these years. He was the one person who didn’t lie to me and didn’t do stupid actions as other people did, ‘for my own good’. I love him, wholly, inside out, top to bottom, you name it.
That man. He is lying here in my arms. Dead.
Blood spills onto my clean white blouse. Or not so clean and white anymore blouse. I don’t care at all. All I can think about is betrayal.
I feel as if he has betrayed me. Hell, he gave up his life without a fight. How could he leave me behind so easily? I trusted him with my heart and soul. I had enough trust problems as it was. After all, didn’t I find out my Father was the biggest Control-Freak of all time?
When I went to Wittenberg and found those documents about my life, my sister’s, I was mortified. When my father entered, he just looked at me like nothing was wrong. He didn’t make any attempts to apologise. I felt like saying: ‘Do they teach you to apologise in spy school? ‘Cause you suck at it.’ and just stomp out of the place, Erin Brockovich style. But no, I broke down in tears showing how utterly weak I really was. Me, Sydney Bristow, ex-double agent, super-spy extraordinaire, broke down at the most inappropriate time. Eventually I gathered up my emotions and ran the hell out of that place and hid. Hid from the world, everyone, including myself.
An hour after I left Wittenburg, the most impossible thing happened. My father was in a car accident. He died two hours later. I couldn’t believe it- I refused to believe it. Jonathan D. Bristow, also ex-double agent, super-spy extraordinaire, died from a simple car accident. A freaking car accident. I felt myself, breaking down once more. Even though he had hurt me so badly, he was still my father.
I was the last person on the planet to know. It really felt like that.
The next morning as I walked through the doors of the JTF building, everyone was staring at me, but avoided talking to me. The lady at the front desk nervously told me that Dixon wanted me in his office now.
I sat down on a chair in his office. He babbled on and on. At the time I wished he would have just stopped wasting my time and tell me what the hell was wrong. In the end he did and I remember doing a good job of running and crying that day.
I even remember the man currently lying in my arms, offering his condolences. At the time he was the most arrogant prick if truth be known. He even knew about my father’s business-slash-interference in my life. At first I was going to bash the living daylights out of him, but fear not, my emotions got the better of me. Again. I broke down and cried yet again.
Though I had experienced the worst pain I had ever felt in my entire life so far on that day, that night- was the best night of my f***ed up life. We made the most passionate love I had ever experienced.
I learned to love him. One day I accidentally blurted out that I did. Loved him that was. He looked at me and smiled. Though he didn’t say anything back, I was content.
I hear the front door of my apartment open. It brings me back to the stupid thing called reality.
Footsteps come towards me in a rhythmic beat.
Suddenly, noise makes me nauseous. Maybe it was also from the sight of blood; so much blood.
Instead of throwing up all my insides, I lost consciousness as I feel myself being picked up. The last thing I remember was staring into a familiar face.
A/N2: Just a reminder that this fic is a work in progress (WIP) … sorry to say, I don’t have much time these days to update it, but I should be able to update in about 3 weeks or something… schools over then!
