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Dark thoughts

Discussion in 'Creative Writing & Arts' started by CareyAli, Mar 13, 2003.

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  1. CareyAli

    CareyAli Rocket Ranger

    Joined:
    Feb 26, 2003
    Location:
    Tennessee
    Ok, guys this is my first fan-fic, but I dont care if you are kind or not! I want your honest opinions, do you want me to continue? And if so, give me some ideas and your criticism. Thanks!



    As Sydney stared at the glowing television not really watching, but not quite ready to turn it off, her thoughts began to drift. At first, she thought about the funny things, about how cute and excited Will had looked at his first CIA meeting, about how sweet Vaughn had been to let her make that horrible shot when they were playing hockey. Then, her thoughts slowly began to shift to the dark questions that had been sitting in farthest corner of her mind ever since her mother had betrayed her.

    Did she deserve Vaughn? Yes, she knew that he loved her, and she certainly loved him, but did she really deserve him. Even now, how did he put up with all of her burdens? Then, the what if's? began to plague her. What if she had in some shape or form inherited the evil trait that made her despise her mother? What if she was destined to become like her mother? And worst of all, what if once Vaughn found out all of these supposedly horrible things about her he would'nt want to be with her anymore?

    The more Sydney tried to push these thoughts to the back of her mind, the more they seemed to haunt her. Finally, just as she was drifting off to sleep she heard a voice that she knew all to well call "Sydney!".
     
  2. aliasjgfanaticmv

    aliasjgfanaticmv Rocket Ranger

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    shouldn't matter to you where I live
    ooo,ooo, who's voice?! We know a lot of voices all too well...I'm thinking ELF or Vaughn. This is a great start!

    *runs out of room like a drunken weasel*
     
  3. interesting...
    --mandy :angelic:
     
  4. CareyAli

    CareyAli Rocket Ranger

    Joined:
    Feb 26, 2003
    Location:
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    Thanks you guys! well, I just now started it, so I think that I will have another part of it up at the earliest tonight, but at the latest early tomorrow. We dont have school tomorrow! Yippee!!!
     
  5. aliaschick4mv

    aliaschick4mv Rocket Ranger

    Joined:
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    East Coast
    This is really great! Keep going!
     
  6. nancee

    nancee Rocket Ranger

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    Feb 26, 2003
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    from da hood
    so r they goin out?...
     
  7. CareyAli

    CareyAli Rocket Ranger

    Joined:
    Feb 26, 2003
    Location:
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    To answer a question, yes, they are going out this whole story is taking place after " A Dark Turn"

    Heres the next part!


    “Will! What are you doing up this late?” Sydney replied groggily as she checked the glaring face of the clock to see what time it was. “It’s two in the morning!”

    “Well, you know, I was just up and thought that…hey! Wait, Syd, why are you up? Don’t you have a top secret meeting or something tomorrow?”

    Sydney groaned at the thought, she knew what was coming. Kendall would rip her father apart for trusting her mother, even though he was the one who made the final decision as to whether or not she was let out in the first place. She could hear it now, “ Jack! What on earth were you thinking? I knew it, I mean, I should have known! That woman….” Then Kendall would continue to rant and rave until he was satisfied. Sydney just couldn’t wait…….

    “Earth to Sydney, hello?” Sydney suddenly snapped out of it, she had been drifting too much lately, not that it wasn’t like her to zone out, but still.

    ‘Sorry, I guess I’m just sleepy.”

    “Ya well, as long as your up I need to ask you something.” Will sounded a bit troubled, and Sydney was suddenly sitting strait up in her bed looking concerned.

    “It’s just, I’ve been having these weird dreams lately, and in every one Francie is there.” Will began to look slightly embarrassed, but before he could explain Sydney interrupted.

    “Will, that’s so sweet! This is going to be…..” Will cut Sydney off in mid sentence. “ No Syd, its not like that she’s just there looking at me, staring over me with this look in her eyes and she keeps asking me….” Suddenly the door burst open.

    “Francie!” Will and Sydney pronounced at the same time.
     
  8. CareyAli

    CareyAli Rocket Ranger

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    Continue?
     
  9. YES!
    --Mandy :angelic:
     
  10. bluheart13

    bluheart13 Rocket Ranger

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    Feb 26, 2003
    of course continue
     
  11. vartansgrl

    vartansgrl Rocket Ranger

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    North Bergen, NJ
    you cant stop now - wat are u thinking

    c'mon keep going please i wanna reaD wat happens next
     
  12. CareyAli

    CareyAli Rocket Ranger

    Joined:
    Feb 26, 2003
    Location:
    Tennessee
    Here is the next part, I hope you guys enjoy!

    “Hey guys, um… what’s gong on in here?” Francie asked. But, somehow Sydney already knew by the look in her eyes that she had heard their entire conversation.

    “You guys weren’t talking about me were you?” She asked, dramatically emphasizing the me as if to put another dig into Sydney’s already distressed mood. Sydney was confused. This was her best friend standing in front of her! But something was wrong, and she couldn’t quite place it. This person in front of her, she looked like Francie, she sounded like Francie, she even smelled like Francie! But, somehow there was something different about her. She didn’t smile the way that she used to, and she never laughed. Sydney began to remember the time when……

    “Sydney, are you awake? Hello?” These words had begun to be common ones when directed towards Sydney, and she immediately snapped out of it.

    “ What is up with you lately Syd,” Francie asked for like the millionth time, but this time Will expressed the same concern that she did.

    Sydney stuck by her old excuse as she replied “ nothing, nothing at all, I’m just tired.”

    Somehow, Will seemed to know. When Will was curious, he wouldn’t stop interrogating Sydney until he knew what was wrong, but now, he seemed to know that whatever was making Sydney fade in and out like she had been lately was something that she didn’t have to tell him. Francie, on the other hand……

    “Sydney, you have been acting to weird lately, what is up? You never have time for us anymore, and when you do its like your in another world!” Francie was using that tone that was all too familiar to Sydney, but yet it was one that she didn’t recognize. Before that last couple of weeks Francie had gotten on her about her job before, but in a way she seemed to understand. Now, it was like she almost enjoyed taunting Sydney, and was just waiting for her to break.

    “Look Fran, I don’t mean……” Sydney was startled in mid sentence by the ringing of the telephone. Immediately she looked at the clock, 6:00! Sydney was already twenty minutes late to what could turn out to be one of the most important meetings she would ever have.
     
  13. nice. post mroe soon
    --Mandy :angelic:
     
  14. aliasjgfanaticmv

    aliasjgfanaticmv Rocket Ranger

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    Oh poor Syd!! No sleep at all!! This is great, keep going!
     
  15. aliaschick4mv

    aliaschick4mv Rocket Ranger

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    Location:
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    Poor Syd. She needs to sleep more.
     
  16. CareyAli

    CareyAli Rocket Ranger

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    Sorry it took so long, but here is the next part!

    Although Sydney knew she had to, she was not anxious to pick up the phone, and genuinly had the notion of not doing so. “I’ll get it!” Francie suddenly volunteered.

    “No!” Sydney cried, by one glance at Francie’s face she knew that she had made a mistake.
    “I mean, uh, I’ll get it.” Sydney knew she was in for it, and braced herself.

    “ Whatever Syd, you just need to get it together!” Francie said, with an obvious edge to her voice.

    With that Francie left the room, making sure to slam the door behind her, but Sydney couldn’t help but feel as though she was still listening. *That’s silly * she thought, *Francie’s just upset, nothing new.* As all of this was taking place the phone continued to ring, and Will was still sitting on the bed looking deeply confused. Sydney did not want to answer it, knowing what it meant, but she forced herself to do so. “Hello….”

    CIA HEADQUARTERS

    As Sydney walked into the building that she knew all to well, she felt as though everyone within a twenty -foot radius was staring at her. She began to get that feeling that she got whenever she thought about her mother. This time though, she couldn’t shake it, no matter how hard she tried.

    Preparing for the worst Sydney walked into the CIA briefing room, now a full hour and a half late. As she was performing a routine glance around the room she froze, she could not believe who she saw.
     
  17. IluvVaughn13

    IluvVaughn13 Vaughnster's Girl

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    Where ever Michael Vartan is (-:
    omg omg omg omg omg who is it who is it ahhhhh write more
     
  18. nancee

    nancee Rocket Ranger

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    okee wait...is francie here francie or freplica?...good on by the way
     
  19. Scarlet Crystal

    Scarlet Crystal Bibbity Rabbity

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    Dec 30, 2002
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    Narnia
    wow, cool! i like your writing!
     
  20. CareyAli

    CareyAli Rocket Ranger

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    lol! Francie is Freplica by the way, sorry if I didnt make that clear. Anything else ya'll are confused about?Oh ya, thanks!!
     

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