Elanthian Songs, Limericks, and Bar Games!

Kuzzle

Cadet
Ok, so I decided I'd make a thread for people to post any songs, limericks, or bar games they come up with that relate to Hero's Journey. I don't know how successful this'll be, since coming up with something's difficult, at least for me, but... Do it anyway!

Ugh... Looks like I'm first on the chopping block, eh? Well, here goes nothing...

I once met a strange little Qwi
She only came up to your knee
She drank like a frog
And hit like a tog
Oh how I love my Aunt Bee!

Ok, yeah, I know it sounds more like a Burian, but who's to say no Qwi act like that? Besides, have you ever had to come up with a limerick on the spot? It sucks. Now do it, 'cause it's your turn!
 
(*Solo*)
Once upon a sunny morn, I came upon a knife.
I put it in my pocket, and I went home to me wife.
I didn't think much of the blade until I hit the sack.
And I woke up in the morning with it sticking out me back!!!!

(*All together*)
OH!!! Me wife!
She took me life!

(*solo*)
But at least before the night was dooooooonnnneeee......

(*together*)
SHE GAVE ME THE BEST LOVIN OF ME LIFE!!!!!!!!!!
 
~~The Cleric and the Tog~~

The local cleric was looking for someone to fill the vacancy of bell ringer at his church. He put up notices on the church door and retired to his office. A short while later he heard someone banging loudly on the church door. When he opened it, he saw a very large, young Tog smiling down at him. Thinking the Tog looked rather familiar, the cleric took a step back so he could look up and not crane his head back so far. "Yes?"

"Me ring bells good," said the Tog, shoving the fisted vacancy notice at the priest.

Slightly taken aback, the cleric asked the Tog if he had any experience with such things. "Me ring bells good," repeated the Tog, grinning from ear to ear as though this response summed up years of experience in all of four syllables. Sighing inwardly, and still trying to figure out if he knew the Tog or not, the cleric said, "Well, I supppose it won't hurt to let you show me how well you can ring a bell." And with that the Tog beamed even more broadly and pushed past the cleric and headed for the stairs leading up to belfry tower. "Wait!" shouted the priest, "The pull-rope is over this way," wondering how much experience this Tog actually had. But the jolly, green giant just beamed and took the belfry stairs two and a time.

Huffing and puffing, the cleric reached the belfry several moments after the Tog just in time to watch him charge at the bell screaming. Aghast, the cleric could only stand dumfounded as the large Tog slammed face first into the bell, setting it to a loud peal. To the priests continuing horror, however, the momentum of the Tog kept him running past the wooden barrier and he plunged down the shaft of the tower with a loud crash.

Finally gaining his senses, the cleric tore back down the tower stairs only to find the Tog had fallen to his death. A few people who had heard the commotion had started to gather and one asked the priest who the Tog was.

"I don't really know," said the priest, rubbing his chin in thought. "But his face sure does ring a bell."

:D

And there's more!

~~The Cleric and the Tog, Part II~~

The next day, the cleric was once again in his office when he heard a familiar loud banging on the church door. Wondering who it could be this time, he hurried to open the door lest it be broken down. Whoever was pounding on it was outdoing the Tog who had grieviously died the day before. Muttering under his breath, the cleric opened the door only to find another young Tog standing on the church doorstep. Gaping at the newcomer, the cleric was astonished to realise that this Tog was even larger, and from his looks, must be related to the one from the day before. And as if adept at reading minds, the Tog boomed, "Me ring bell good like brother. Me do his job!"

The cleric could only nod and do a fair imitation of a fish, but eventually managed to splutter out, "The rope is over here..." But before the cleric could even take a step in the right direction, the Tog took the steps up the bell tower three at a time. Inwardly cursing, the cleric hurried after the Tog, if only to prevent another accident like the one from the day before. The cursing became more emphatic as soon as he reached the bell room, because to his dismay, the uncanny look-alike to yesterday's Tog was already barreling towards the bell with a grin of absolute glee plastered on his face.

Unable to look away from this morbid spectacle, the cleric watched as the Tog slammed face first into the bell and barreled over the ledge just like his sibling had done the day before. With a rather nasty oath, the cleric ran back down the stairs, and was not surprised to see the second Tog in as many days lying inert on the church floor. Once again a small crowd of nearby people drawn by the commotion had gathered, and one turned to the priest and asked, "Who is this one, then?"

The cleric sighed and said, "I don't know this one either, but he sure is a dead ringer for his brother."

:D


Taken from a player created DR source and modified slightly to fit an HJ environment. Credit goes to Sammkit for the original concept and layout.
 
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