Fave CSI quotes

Hiya! okay so some people have said funny things on CSI so i thought i would make a fave quotes topic! lol ok so mine is

I forget who, but he finds an arm in a meat grinder...it's all bloody and gross:
guy: "I'm gonna need a hand"

lol...it was so funny!

ems
 
I don't remember it exactly, but Gil and Greg are talking and it goes something like this.

Greg: I absorb information. *Something else*
Gil: Hey, that's my line
Greg: I know, and I absorbed it!

There are so many!!! Wait...I'll go find some...
 
Sidle: "Since when have you cared about beauty?"
Grissom: "Since I met you."

Priest -- "I celebrate mass every Sunday."
Grissom -- "Thank you, but no."
Priest -- "You don't believe?"
Grissom -- "In religion. I believe in God, in Science, in Sunday supper. I don't believe in rules that tell me how I should live."
Priest -- "Even if they were handed down by God?"
Grissom -- "How many crusades were fought in the name of God? How many people died because of someone's religion?"
Priest -- "Fanaticism, not religion."
Grissom -- "Semantics. They're still dead."

Catherine -- "I don't have to run any tests! You cannot absorb enough cocaine through your penis to OD!"
Grissom -- "Cite your source."
Catherine -- "I don't have a source!"
Grissom -- "That's why we did the tests."
Catherine --" What-ever."

Nick -- "Eh. But you're taller... thinner.."
Sara -- "Oh butter that toast, Nick."

Catherine -- "Because spam can't be absorbed through the penis. And if you ask me to cite my source..."
Grissom -- "I'll take your word for it."

"The tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth"
Sara Sidle

"There's only one interpretation for this, he killed a pig"
--Gil Grissom - Cross Jurisdictions

"It all comes down to shoe prints"
--Warrick Brown - Unfriendly Skies

"Gil Grissom? ...Or should I call you Spider Man?"

"There's one thing that you learn on this job, is that human beings are capable of anything"
-- Catherine Willows - And Then There Were None

"Like Hansel and Gretel, we just follow the crumbs all the way home"
-- Catherine Willows - And Then There Were None

"Dressed as a woman, among men dressed as women...now that's a disguise."
-- Gil Grissom

"Excuse me, but could everyone in this room, do me a big favour and leave, please"
-- Gil Grissom - Chaos Theory

"Everyday we meet people on the worst day of their lives"
-- Gil Grissom - Too Tough to Die

"Officer moron contaminated the scene."

"You should be reading car and driver instead of sand and surf."

"High altitude enhances the entire sexual experience. It increases the euphoria."
-- Gil Grissom - Unfriendly Skies

"Everyone should witness an autopsy on their first night."
-- Captain Jim Brass - Pilot

"If you chase two rabbits, you lose them both."
-- Gil Grissom

"You say tomato... I say cause of death."
-- Dr David Robbins

"It's never a good sign when a guy has more women than furniture."
-- Catherine Willows

"Only clue he's got is a missing boat, which sucks because...it's missing."
-- Warrick Brown
 
"It's not important what people say about us. It's important what we think of ourselves inside."
-- Horatio Caine Kane

"Just like my father said, you have no backup, you have no plan."
-- Horatio Caine

" What lacks evidence is evidence."
-- Horatio Caine, Ashes to Ashes

"You can't plan detail because events are random."
-- Speed

Jimmy Fukes -- "You're not going to be able to prove a thing."
Horatio -- "That is a very dumb thing to say to a CSI."

Horatio -- "So what do you get when a six foot tall man lays down with a three foot long rifle?"
Calleigh -- "Hot flashes...but that's just me."
 
We loved this one from fur and loathing:


GRISSOM: Well, Freud said that the only unnatural sexual behavior was to have
none at all. And after that, it's just a question of opportunity and
preference. And evidently, many prefer the feel of fur to the texture of human
skin.

CATHERINE: Well, I like hairy chests, but I'm not about to bop a six-foot
weasel.

That was just sooooo much jokesLOL


And this, from invisible evidence...



SARA: Grissom, um, I, um, wanted to talk to you about something.

GRISSOM: Go ahead.

SARA: Well, you know, I applied for the promotion for the key position.

GRISSOM: Your application's on my desk.

SARA: About that -- I, um ... I needed to know ... I ... I
wanted to make sure, rather, that anything that happened or didn't happen
between us won't be a factor.

The absolutely stunned look on Grissoms face was absolutely priceless!!!:lol:

Never, as long as I live, will I forget that expression!!!
 
Ok, thought I'd inflict some of my fave quotes on you:

Catherine: "Well, it is a leg bone, and my guess is that it didn't walk out here by itself."

Gil: You've been talking to our sheriff.
Cath: I've been listening to our sheriff

Grissom: "A, B, C, D, or all of the above. Standoff with police, man gets shot in the chest, runs back into his burning house inhaling smoke as he goes, the roof collapses, air conditioning unit falls on his head. He dies. What killed him?"

Gil: "If you're going to badger me about your crime scene location put it in a memo."
Cath: "You don't read memos

Gil: "To get the evidence, we may have to destroy the evidence."
Cath: "Do you get these haikus out of a book, or do they just come to you?"

Catherine: "Didn't Shakespeare say 'let's kill all the lawyers'?"
Gil: "Yeah. Henry VI. Where is he when we need him?"

Grissom: Sometimes I can be a little thoughtless.
Catherine: I wouldn't say that. Not just any guy would walk a girl to the morgue

Warrick: Where have you been?
Grissom: I can't be everywhere Warrick, and they banned human cloning.

Cath: “Oh, yeah. That's what you see out of. I once dated the Detroit Lions Mascot. Off-season. Dutch was his name.”
Gil: “The breadth of your social experience never ceases to impress me.”

Cath:“You going to have my back?”
Gil: “I always have your back.”

I'll stop there before I get carried away.
 
[about a decapitation case]
Catherine: Definitely a crime of passion.
Grissom: You think a female did this?
Catherine: I could have.
Grissom: Scared of you.

Dr. Al Robbins: Hand me that foot, would you?

Greg Sanders: Cath? Your DNA results are back. According to my DNA data, the types are 814 quadrillion to one - that your suspect is our killer. Pretty good stats...
Catherine Willows: Yeah, considering there are only six billion people in world.

Gil Grissom: Greg?
Greg Sanders: Yeah.
Gil Grissom: I need you to take off your shoes and socks.
Greg Sanders: See, now we're getting into this whole strip forensics thing, and I'm not sure I can hang with that. Even if you are my boss.
 
K. Ackles said:
"Gil Grissom? ...Or should I call you Spider Man?"

"Dressed as a woman, among men dressed as women...now that's a disguise."
-- Gil Grissom

"Officer moron contaminated the scene."

"You say tomato... I say cause of death."
-- Dr David Robbins

"It's never a good sign when a guy has more women than furniture."
-- Catherine Willows
heheheheh these ones made me laugh :lol:
 
Doc Robbins: Urine....Ur---out!

Sara: It never ceases to amaze me what people do to one another

Sara: I wish I was like you Grissom, I wish I didnt feel anything...
 
sorry if dublicates...I don't necessarily remember the exact quote so it's something like that

Cath: it's raining man juice?
Sara: Hallelujah

Police man:Problems with the wife?
Grissom: yes she hates when I'm away

Sara: I could really, really just kiss you right now

Greg:Sara are we still up to lunch break?
Sara: Sorry Greggo, hot case. Do you have the fibers from the Johnsson case
Greg: (someone) is running them up to computer
Grissom: can you fill me in?
Greg: Nothing, Sara and I was just going to get some lunch
Grissom:About the case, Greggo

Greg: Did you wear one of these?
Cath:I wore nothing, but skin

Greg:the french place,huh?
Cath:yea
Greg: I go there with my friends sometimes. Any change I've seen your perform?
Cath:Nope. You would remember me

Sara:Body farm, how was it?
Cath:Quiet
 
Gil-Pika
Doc Robbins-Boo?

Grissom-Repeat after me SILK SILK SILK SILK SILK.
Nick-SILK SILK SILK SILK SILK
Grissom-Now what do cows drink?
Nick-Milk
Grissom-No, they give milk. they drink water

LATER...

Nick-Hey Cath, you up for a riddle?
Cath-sure
Nick-repeat after me, SILK SILK SILK SILK SILK
Cath-SILK SILK SILK SILK SILK
Nick-What do cows drink? (Grinning)
Cath-Water, why?
Nick-never mind

These are all quotes by my friend Laurel. She LOVES CSI. CSI to her is like Alias to me. Enough said.
 
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