Dismiss Notice
Alien Soup is a free community for fans of science-fiction, horror, & fantasy! Everybody is welcome here.

Favorite Quotes

Discussion in 'Open Chat' started by Vaughn_Lovah, Mar 27, 2003.

  1. Vaughn_Lovah

    Vaughn_Lovah Vaughn's Chin Fondler

    Joined:
    Feb 27, 2003
    Location:
    my mama
    I was bored so I decided to start this. Just state a quote that cracks you up every time you hear it or just one of your all time favorite quotes. Ill start it off.

    "Faaaat guy in a little cooooooat, faaaaaaaat guy in a little coooooat." -Chris Farley

    ^_^ - VL
     
  2. Victoria King

    Victoria King Rocket Ranger

    Joined:
    Jan 21, 2003
    Location:
    USA
    "plus their super swank!" -marshall(i know its alias but hey it cracks me up!LOL)

    and i cant really think of any, ill get back to you on this one!LOL
     
  3. Vaughn_Lovah

    Vaughn_Lovah Vaughn's Chin Fondler

    Joined:
    Feb 27, 2003
    Location:
    my mama
    hehehehe Ive got another one.

    "That aint no hem-mer-roid, thats an alien hoooba-jooob!" -Cheif South Park
     
  4. a.k.a.Kate_Jones

    a.k.a.Kate_Jones Rocket Ranger

    Joined:
    Dec 13, 2002
    Location:
    behind you.
    ok, so these aren't really funny, but they're so memorable...

    "Of all the bars in all the joints in all the towns of all of the world, she had to walk into mine."

    "A woman happily in love, she burns the souffle. A woman unhappily in love, she forgets to turn on the oven."

    "Bond. James Bond" couldn't resist that one!

    I'll come up with more soon!
     
  5. Vaughn_Lovah

    Vaughn_Lovah Vaughn's Chin Fondler

    Joined:
    Feb 27, 2003
    Location:
    my mama
    Why dont we just change this to Favorite Quotes then? Charlie think you can do that?
    anyway that first one sounds familiar, what is it from?
     
  6. a.k.a.Kate_Jones

    a.k.a.Kate_Jones Rocket Ranger

    Joined:
    Dec 13, 2002
    Location:
    behind you.
    Casablanca... :D

    I've got more!

    "How can the kids learn how to read if they can't even fit inside the doors? What is this, a school for ants? It has to be...........three times bigger than this!"

    "When I was in seventh grade, I was...the fat kid."
    "Ewwww!"

    "So I....I became bulimic."
    "You can read minds?"

    :LOL: those are all from Zoolander!
     
  7. Vaughn_Lovah

    Vaughn_Lovah Vaughn's Chin Fondler

    Joined:
    Feb 27, 2003
    Location:
    my mama
    Ah yes now I remember those.

    "Jojo the idiot circus boy with a pretty new pet" -Tommy Boy
     
  8. Vaughn_Lovah

    Vaughn_Lovah Vaughn's Chin Fondler

    Joined:
    Feb 27, 2003
    Location:
    my mama
    ah this is one of my favorites...

    "Every man dies, but not every man really lives." -Braveheart
     
  9. Adriana

    Adriana Rocket Ranger

    Joined:
    Mar 19, 2003
    Location:
    oklahoma
    okay...i'm not sure if we are supposed to stick w/movies...but this is from SNL a few weeks ago....


    "I heard they played the superbowl in THIS wal-mart"
    "I heard they sell the superbowls in THIS wal-mart"
    "I KNOW!!!"

    oh...and....

    "Here you're gonna need some water for your journey"
    "She never gonna make it. shes too OLD!"
    "i KNOW!!!!"
     
  10. crazy spinster

    crazy spinster Rocket Ranger

    Joined:
    Dec 9, 2002
    Location:
    california. bay area or socal, depending.
    man, if only i was on my regular computer in san diego, i could post tons of funny quotes (mostly from books), but i'm here so i'll just say one off the top of my head.

    "why you want to leeeeaaaave me??" - toula's father, my big fat greek wedding.

    it was just funny the way he said it. totally sounded like my mother when i told her i wanted to go to school five hundred miles away. :LOL:
     
  11. SiriCerasi

    SiriCerasi Rocket Ranger

    Joined:
    Dec 8, 2002
    Location:
    CA
    hmm i can think of a lot but most of you probably wouldnt get them as they are from my hordes of fantasy books ^_^
     
  12. crazy spinster

    crazy spinster Rocket Ranger

    Joined:
    Dec 9, 2002
    Location:
    california. bay area or socal, depending.
    ooh, okay, i found some more. i love quotes. i'm a huuuuge quotes fan. i even had an entire webpage devoted to all different kinds of quotes several years ago. one of my friends even gave me a huge quotes book for my birthday once. okay, enough of that, here, enjoy!


    "A cookie store is a bad idea. Besides, the market research reports say America likes crispy cookies, not soft and chewy cookies like you make." -- Response to Debbi Fields' idea of starting Mrs. Fields' Cookies.

    "I am not part of the problem. I am a Republican." -- Dan Quayle

    "They couldn't hit an elephant at this dist--" -- General John Sedgwick's last words, uttered during a U.S. Civil War Battle, 1864

    "For seven and half years I've worked alongside President Reagan. We've had triumphs. Made some mistakes. We've had some sex...uh...setbacks." -- President George Bush (stated when Vice President)

    Question: If you could live forever, would you and why?
    Answer: "I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever." -- Miss Alabama [in the 1994 Miss Universe contest]

    "Men, I want you just thinking of one word all season. One word and one word only: Super Bowl." -- Bill Peterson, football coach

    "Be sure and put some of those neutrons on it." -- Mike Smith, baseball player [ordering a salad at a restaurant]

    "We are not without accomplishment. We have managed to distribute poverty equally." -- Nguyen Co Thatch, Vietnamese foreign minister

    "Fiction writing is good. You can make up almost anything." -- Ivana Trump [after finishing her first novel]

    "I love California. I practically grew up in Phoenix." -- Dan Quayle

    "What a waste it is to lose one's mind. Or not to have a mind is being very wasteful. How true that is." -- Dan Quayle

    "It is wonderful to be here in the great state of Chicago..." -- Dan Quayle

    "We're gonna turn this team around 360 degrees." -- Jason Kidd

    "I support efforts to limit the terms of members of Congress, especially members of the House and members of the Senate." -- Dan Quayle

    "Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country." -- Mayor Marion Barry


    hehehehe...i know i had a lot from dan quayle, but honestly, that guy's a riot. :LOL:
     
  13. crazy spinster

    crazy spinster Rocket Ranger

    Joined:
    Dec 9, 2002
    Location:
    california. bay area or socal, depending.
    and here are some more!!

    "Someday we'll look back on this moment and plow into a parked car." -- Evan Davis

    "I'm living so far beyond my income that we may almost be said to be living apart." -- e. e. cummings

    "Opera is when a guy gets stabbed in the back and, instead of bleeding, he sings." -- Ed Gardner

    "My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four. Unless there are three other people." -- Orson Welles

    "Beer commercials are so patriotic: 'Made the American Way.' What does that have to do with America? Is that what America stands for? Feeling sluggish and urinating frequently?" -- Evelyn Waugh

    "Neurotics build castles in the air, psychotics live in them. My mother cleans them." -- Rita Rudner

    "Last night I dreamed I ate a ten-pound marshmallow, and when I woke up the pillow was gone." -- Tommy Cooper

    "If you don't find it in the index, look very carefully through the entire catalogue." -- Sears, Roebuck, and Co., Consumer's Guide, 1897

    "Red meat is NOT bad for you. Now blue-green meat, THAT'S bad for you!" -- Tommy Smothers

    "Grown-ups never understand anything for themselves, and it is tiresome for children to be always and forever explaining things to them." -- Antoine de Saint-Exupery, The Little Prince

    "I am returning this otherwise good typing paper to you because someone has printed gibberish all over it and put your name at the top." -- An English Professor, Ohio University

    "Anyone can do any amount of work provided it isn't the work he is supposed to be doing at the moment." -- Robert Benchley

    "The only reason some people get lost in thought is because it's unfamiliar territory." -- Paul Fix

    "Tact: Ability to tell a man he's open-minded when he has a hole in his head." -- Jean Cocteau

    "When I was a kid my parents moved a lot -- but I always found them." -- Rodney Dangerfield

    "The amount of sleep required by the average person is just five minutes more." -- unknown

    "Women are successful in the business world because the business world was created by men. Men are babies. And women are good with kids." -- P.J. O'Rourke

    "If there is anything the nonconformist hates worse than a conformist, it's another nonconformist who doesn't conform to the prevailing standard of nonconformity." -- Bill Vaughan

    "Life...is like a grapefruit. It's orange and squishy, and has a few pips in it, and some folks have half a one for breakfast." -- Douglas Adams

    "Did you ever notice when you blow in a dog's face he gets mad at you? But when you take him in a car he sticks his head out the window." -- Steve Bluestone

    "I'm desperately trying to figure out why kamikaze pilots wore helmets." -- Dave Edison
     
  14. Adriana

    Adriana Rocket Ranger

    Joined:
    Mar 19, 2003
    Location:
    oklahoma
    lol...some of those quotes were freakin' hilarious!!!!!
     
  15. Adriana

    Adriana Rocket Ranger

    Joined:
    Mar 19, 2003
    Location:
    oklahoma
    Hmmn...i thinkin' maybe this could be due to stinky breath lol...but then again its a dog...and dogs lick themselves...so what do they care if you blow stinky rank breath in there faces lol
     
  16. GO Syd

    GO Syd Rocket Ranger

    Joined:
    Dec 13, 2002
    "a clown is like an asprin only it works twice as fast" groucho marx

    "oustide of a dog a book is a mans best friend, inside ofa dog it is too dark to read" marx
     
  17. crazy spinster

    crazy spinster Rocket Ranger

    Joined:
    Dec 9, 2002
    Location:
    california. bay area or socal, depending.
    okay, here are some more. are you guys getting tired of me yet? :LOL: sorry.


    "I get plenty of exercise -- jumping to conclusions, pushing my luck, and dodging deadlines." -- unknown

    "The difference between 'involvement' and 'commitment' is like an eggs-and-ham breakfast: the chicken was 'involved' -- the pig was 'committed'." -- unknown

    "Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake whole relationships." -- Jimmy Shubert

    "What are the three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere? 'Hold my purse.'" -- Francois Morency

    "You're basically killing each other to see who's got the better imaginary friend." -- Rich Jeni, On going to war over religion

    "Natives who beat drums to drive off evil spirits are objects of scorn to smart Americans who blow horns to break up traffic jams." -- Mary Ellen Kelly

    "Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are a good person is a little like expecting the bull not to attack you because you are a vegetarian." -- Dennis Wholey

    "I like work; it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours." -- Jerome K. Jerome

    "See what will happen if you don't stop biting your fingernails?" -- Will Rogers, to his niece on seeing the Venus de Milo

    "My life has a superb cast but I can't figure out the plot." -- Ashleigh Brilliant

    "College professor--someone who talks in other people's sleep." -- Bergen Evans

    "Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana." -- Lisa Grossman

    "Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning." -- Rich Cook

    "I was going to have cosmetic surgery until I noticed that the doctor's office was full of portraits by Picasso." -- Rita Rudner

    "When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading." -- Henny Youngman

    "There's a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line." -- Oscar Levant

    "I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man I keep his house." -- Zsa Zsa Gabor

    "Millions long for immortality who don't know what to do on a rainy afternoon." -- Susan Ertz

    "The point of quotations is that one can use another's words to be insulting." -- Amanda Cross [hehehehehehe...i love this one! ;)]

    "If the world were a logical place, men would ride side saddle." -- Rita Mae Brown

    "My favorite animal is steak." -- Fran Lebowitz

    "To do is to be." -- Descartes
    "To be is to do." -- Voltaire
    "Do be do be do." -- Frank Sinatra

    "I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by." -- Douglas Adams

    "Can you imagine a world without men? No crime and lots of happy fat women." -- Nicole Hollander

    "No one will ever win the battle of the sexes; there’s too much fraternizing with the enemy." -- Henry Kissinger

    "I often quote myself. It adds spice to my conversation." -- George Bernard Shaw

    "Egotist: a person of low taste, more interested in himself than in me." -- Ambrose Bierce

    "Did I ever tell you how I shot a wild elephant in my pajamas? How he got into my pajamas I'll never know." -- Groucho Marx

    "...a third myth is that men think that women like guys who are dangerous. As a result, guys will often smoke cigarettes, drink too much, and ride a motorcycle without a helmet. The reality? Women don't like guys who are dangerous. Women want us to think that because women are trying to kill us." -- Dennis Miller

    "Caution: Cape does not enable user to fly." -- Batman Costume warning label

    "Those who can laugh without cause have either found the true meaning of happiness or have gone stark raving mad." -- Norm Papernick

    "Some people say that I must be a horrible person, but that's not true. I have the heart of a young boy -- in a jar on my desk." -- Stephen King

    "Somewhere on this globe, every ten seconds, there is a woman giving birth to a child. She must be found and stopped." -- Sam Levenson

    "When I die, I want to go like my grandfather did, peacefully in his sleep. Not yelling and screaming, like all the passengers in his car." -- Emo Phillips

    "I tried sniffing Coke once, but the ice cubes got stuck up my nose." -- Stephen Wright

    "I loathe people who keep dogs. They are cowards who haven't got the guts to bite people themselves." -- August Strindberg
     
  18. aliaschick4mv

    aliaschick4mv Rocket Ranger

    Joined:
    Feb 26, 2003
    Location:
    East Coast
    "Enjoy who you are. Don't hate yourself for what you aren't"- Heather Graham

    "I need to please myself more than I need to please anyone else. If I can't make myself happy, there's no way I'm going to make anyone else happy."- LeAnn Rhimes

    "Tact is telling someone to go to Hell, while making them look forward to the trip."- Unknown (LOL I luve that one)

    "I know that people call me a feminest whenever I express sentiments that differenciate me from a doormat or a prostitute."- Unknown

    "Don't worry about popular opinion. Popular opinion is the opinion of a small group, combined with a larger group, afraid to speak out."- Me

    "You have to be yourself. Be very honest about who and what you are. And if people still like you, that's fine. If they don't, well, it's their problem."- Sting

    "The way I see it if you want to rainbow you've gotta put up with the rain."- Dolly Partan

    "Sometimes it's clearer when you're on the outside looking in, than when you're on the inside looking out."- me

    "Never mourn the end of something. A sunset is just as amazing as a sunrise, only you don't have to get up at 5 in the morning to see it."- Me

    "While some people wonder if the world is going to end with a bang or a whimper, I just want to make sure mine doesn't end with a whine."- Unknown

    "The thing about the rat race is, that even if you win, you're still a rat." Anonymous.

    "Be happy while you're living for you're a long time dead." Scottish Proverb

    "Success is never final, Failure is never fatal, Courage always counts."- High School Wrestling Motto

    "When you meet someone you know you're supposed to be with, your potential as a person becomes greater."- Kate Hudson

    "Far too many people are looking for the right person, instead of trying to be the right person."-Gloria Steinam (my rule for life)

    "Sometimes when I consider what tremendous consequences come from little things...I am tempted to think... there are no little things."- Bruce Barton

    "If every day is an awakening, you will never grow old. You will just keep growing."- Gail Sheeny

    "There are two kinds of people in the world- those who walk into a room and say 'there you are,' and those who say 'here I am.'"- Abigail Van Buren

    "Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of somebody else."- Judy Garland

    "Ships in harbor are safe, but that's not what ships are meant for."- John Shedd

    "When I'm old, I'm never going to say 'I didn't do this' or 'I regret that.' I'm going to say 'I don't regret a damn thing. I came, I went, and I did it all.'"-Kim Basinger

    "Remember, if people talk behind your back, it only means you are 2 steps ahead."- Fannie Flagg

    "Whenever you find yourself at the bottom, and you don't think you have the strength to climb, you can always use the elevator called your friends."- Me

    "Just because something goes wrong, doesn't mean everything is."- Me again.

    LOL yeah, I know it's a ton. But I love em.
     
  19. Victoria King

    Victoria King Rocket Ranger

    Joined:
    Jan 21, 2003
    Location:
    USA
    LOL!!!i said that today,after i found out the new spoilers for countdown i emailed them to my one friend, she imed me immediatly and was "WOW that was amazing!" and i just typed I KNOW!! and said it even though i was tlaking to myself(i do that often!)
    ok, movie quotes, i love these!LOL since i dont know real ppl quotes movie quotes are my game!LOL
    "The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return!"(great movie!)
    "I'll never let go jack ..ill never let go!"(LOL!!!!, now that belongs in the funniest qoutes, i laugh at how corny that is, but when it came out i was crying and now with irina's spoof of that!lol)
    "Im ready for my close-up."*primps hair then smiles!*lol
    "Teacher says, everytime a bell rings an angel gets its wings."
    "atta boy clarence!"-great movie!!classic!
    "Oh yes i will!"-the auction dance scene in gone with the wind!
    "Frankly my dear, i dont give a damn"another gwtw!lol
    and i agree with kate, bond. james bond.
    "Makes my apartment smell moss-sy!"LOL, you've got mail!
    "F-O-X!"
    i could go on and on with movies and romantic comedies but i wont!LOL :P
     
  20. Victoria King

    Victoria King Rocket Ranger

    Joined:
    Jan 21, 2003
    Location:
    USA
    i love this one! oh and i remembered one about dreams from walt disney but i forget it -_-
     

Share This Page