Forwards

i have too many, so i just thought i'd share

Everything I need to know about life, I learned from Noah's Ark...

One: Don't miss the boat.

Two: Remember that we are all in the same boat.

Three: Plan ahead. It wasn't raining when Noah built the Ark.

Four: Stay fit. When you're 600 years old, someone may ask you to do something really big.

Five: Don't listen to critics; just get on with the job that needs to be done.

Six: Build your future on high ground.

Seven: For safety sake, travel in pairs.

Eight: Speed isn't always an advantage. The snails were on board with the cheetahs.

Nine: When you're stressed, float a while.

Ten: Remember, the Ark was built by amateurs; the Titanic by professionals.
 
i hattttttttttteeeeeeeee forwards ... when i get an e-mail that says "FW:" on it i don't even look at it i just delete it ... so i wouldn't know if any of them are funny :laughbounce:
 
hey, i was about to start a thread like this! my friends send me TONS of forwards...usually i'll delete it, but if its interesting i'll save it. i'll post some on here later...have you gotten the one about a guy's first time? lol!
 
Some cool forwards:

> >>>>> A philosophy professor stood before his class and had
> >>>>> some
> >>>>> items
> >>>>> in
> >>>>> front
> >>>>> of
> >>>>> him.
> >>>>> When class began, wordlessly he picked up a large
> >>>>> empty
> >>>>> mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with rocks
> >>>>> right to
> >>>>> the
> >>>>> top,
> >>>>> rocks about 2" diameter.
> >>>>> He then asked the students if the jar was full?
> >>>>> They agreed that it was.
> >>>>> So the professor then picked up a box of pebbles and
> >>>>> poured
> >>>>> them
> >>>>> in
> >>>>> to
> >>>>> the
> >>>>> jar.
> >>>>> He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles, of course,
> >>>>> rolled
> >>>>> into
> >>>>> the
> >>>>> open areas between the rocks. The students laughed.
> >>>>> He asked his students again if the jar was full?
> >>>>> They agreed that yes, it was.
> >>>>> The professor then picked up a box of sand and poured
> >>>>> it into
> >>>>> the
> >>>>> jar.
> >>>>> Of course, the sand filled up everything else.
> >>>>> "Now," said the professor, "I want you to recognize
> >>>>> that this
> >>>>> is
> >>>>> your
> >>>>> life.
> >>>>> The rocks are the important things - your family, your
> >>>>> partner,
> >>>>> your health, your children - anything that is so
> >>>>> important to
> >>>>> you
> >>>>> that
> >>>>> if
> >>>>> it
> >>>>> were lost,
> >>>>> you would be nearly destroyed.
> >>>>> The pebbles are the other things in life that matter,
> >>>>> but on
> >>>>> a
> >>>>> smaller
> >>>>> scale.
> >>>>> The pebbles represent things like your job, your
> >>>>> house,your
> >>>>> car.
> >>>>> The sand is everything else. The small stuff.
> >>>>> If you put the sand or the pebbles into the jar first,
> >>>>> there
> >>>>> is
> >>>>> no
> >>>>> room
> >>>>> for the rocks. The same goes for your life.
> >>>>> If you spend all your energy and time on the small
> >>>>> stuff,
> >>>>> material
> >>>>> things,
> >>>>> you will never have room for the things that are truly
> >>>>> most
> >>>>> important.
> >>>>> Pay attention to the things that are critical in your
> >>>>> life.
> >>>>> Play with your children.
> >>>>> Take your partner out dancing There will always be
> >>>>> time
> >>>>> to go
> >>>>> to
> >>>>> work,
> >>>>> clean the house, give a dinner party and fix the
> >>>>> disposal."
> >>>>> Take care of the rocks first - the things that really
> >>>>> matter.
> >>>>> Set your priorities.
> >>>>> The rest is just pebbles and sand
> >>>>> OK, this is what you have to do...: Send this to ALL
> >>>>> of your
> >>>>> friends!
> >>>>> But you HAVE to send this within 1hour from when you
> >>>>> open it!
> >>>>> Now..................Make A wish!!!!!!
> >>>>> Are you wishing????
> >>>>> You should be done by now!!!
> >>>>> Last chance!!
> >>>>> I hope you made your wish!
> >>>>> Now then, if you send this to
> >>>>> 1 person......your wish will be granted in 1 year -
> >>>>> 3 people~6 months -
> >>>>> 5 people~3 months -
> >>>>> 6 people~ 1 month -
> >>>>> 7 people~ 2 weeks -
> >>>>> 8 people~ 1 week -
> >>>>> 9 people~ 5 days -
> >>>>> 10 people~ 3 days -
> >>>>> 12 people~ 2 days -
> >>>>> 15 people~ 1 day -
> >>>>> 20 people~ 3 hours AND,
> >>>>> if you are my true friend you will send this back
>
> >>>>> But ... if you send it 2 your friends ... you will
> >>>>> automatically
> >>>>> have 3 years of good luck!!! :smiley:
> >>>>> Believe in yourself, know what you want, and make it
> >>>>> happen!

--------------------------------------------

>10th grade
>
>As I sat there in English class, I stared at the girl next to me. She was my so called "best friend". I stared at her long, silky hair, and wished she was mine. But she didn't notice me like that, and I knew it. After class, she walked up to me and asked me for the notes she had missed the day before and handed them to her. She said "thanks" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I wanted to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.
>
>11th grade
>
>The phone rang. On the other end, it was her. She was in tears, mumbling on and on about how her love had broke her heart. She asked me to come over because she didn't want to be alone, so I did. As I sat next to her on the sofa, I stared at her soft eyes, wishing she was mine. After 2 hours, one Drew Barrymore movie, and three bags of chips, she decided to go to sleep. She looked at me, said "thanks" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.
>
>Senior year
>
>The day before prom she walked to my locker. "My date is sick" she said; he's not going to go well, I didn't have a date, and in 7th grade, we made a promise that if neither of us had dates, we would go together just as "best friends". So we did. Prom night, after everything was over, I was standing at her front door step! I stared at her as she smiled at me and stared at me with her crystal eyes. I want her to be mine, but she doesn't think of me like that, and I know it. Then she said "I had the best time, thanks!" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.
>
>Graduation Day
>
>A day passed, then a week, then a month. Before I could blink, it was graduation day. I watched as her perfect body floated like an angel up on stage to get her diploma. I wanted her to be mine, but she didn't notice me like that, and I knew it. Before everyone
>went home, she came to me in her smock and hat, and cried as I hugged her. Then she lifted her head from my shoulder and said, "you're my best friend, thanks" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.
>
>A Few Years Later
>
>Now I sit in the pews of the church. That girl is getting married now. I watched her say "I do" and drive off to her new life, married to another man. I wanted her to be mine, but she didn`t see me like that, and I knew it. But before she drove away, she came to me and said "you came!". She said "thanks" and kissed me on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.
>
>Funeral
>
>Years passed, I looked down at the coffin of a girl who used to be my "best friend". At the service, they read a diary entry she had wrote in her high school years. This is what it read:
>I stare at him wishing he was mine, but he doesn't notice me like that, and I know it. I want to tell him, I want him to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love him but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why. I wish he would tell me he loved me!
>I wish I did too... I thought to my self, and I cried.
>
>
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>i love u
>
>
>Send this to all the people that you love! Even if you dont love someone send it to them....just to let them no that your thinkin about them!!
>
>Send this to!
>*5 people and ull have a bad love life
>*10 people and ull get asked out by ur crush
>*15 people and ull make out with ur crush
>*20 or more people and ull marry ur crush
>
>
>DONT WAIT CAUSE IT MIGHT BE TOO LATE TELL THE PEOPLE YOU LOVE THAT YOU LOVE THEM OR YOU WILL REGRET IT THE REST OF YOUR LIFE!!!!!

-------------------------------------------

*This is so cute!!!!!! and it's all true! All those things that they say girls love guys for is true!!! (hint) (hint)
*This is really cute guys! especially the end
*This chain letter is real we followed the
instructions and we are going out with our crushes!!
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Sorry, but this chain letter is for real, I got it the first time, and I ignored it and a week later and the love of my life for 6-months dumped me for no good reason so beware, and just send the stupid letter!!!!!!

The Lovers of the Heart








In order to form a more perfect kiss, enable the mighty hug to promote
to whom we please but one kiss.
Article 1 : Statement of Love: The Kiss
1. Kiss on the hand.... I adore you
2. Kiss on the cheek... I just want to be friends
3. Kiss on the neck... I want you
4. Kiss on the lips... I love you
5. Kiss on the ears... I am just playing (I hate that)
6. Kiss anywhere else ... lets not get carried away
7. Look in your eyes ... kiss me
8. Playing with your hair... I can't live without you
9. Hand on your waist... I love you to much to let you go

Article 2: The Three Steps
1. Girls: If any guys gets fresh with you, slap him
2. Guys: If any girl slaps you, her intentions are still good
! ;! ; ! ! 3. Guy and Girls: Close your eyes when kissing, it is rude to stare

Article 3: The Commandments
1. Thou shall not squeeze to hard.
2. Thou shall not ask for a kiss, just give one or take one.
3. Thou shall kiss at every opportunity.









**Remember**
A peach is a peach
A plum is a plum,
A kiss isn't a kiss without some tongue
so open up your mouth,
close your eyes,
and give your tongue some exercise!!!








well, here's a few reasons why guys like girls...
1. They will always smell good even if its just shampoo
2. The way their heads always find the right spot on our shoulder
3. How cute they look when they sleep
4. the ease in which they fit into our arms
5. The way they kiss you and all of a sudden everything is right in the world
6. How cute they are when they eat
7. The way they take hours to get dressed but in the end makes it all worth while
8. because they are always warm even when its minus 30 out side
9. The way they look good no matter what they wear
10. the way they fish for compliments even though you both know that you think she's the most beautiful thing on this earth
11. How cute they are when they argue
12. the way her hand always finds yours
13. The way they smile
14. the way you feel when you see their name on the call ID after you just had a big fight
15. The way she says "lets not fight anymore" even though you know that an hour later you will be arguing about something
16. the way they kiss when you do something nice for them
17. The way they kiss you when you say "I love you'
18. Actually ... ! ! just the way they kiss you...
19. The way they fall into your arms when they cry
20. then the way they apologize for crying over something that silly
21. The way they hit you and expect it to hurt
22. Then the way they apologize when it does hurt . (even though we don't admit it)!
23. the way they say "I miss you"
24. the way you miss them
25. the way their tears make you want to change the world so that it doesn't hurt her anymore.....Yet regardless if you love them, hate them, wish they would die or know that you would die without them ... it matters not. Because once in your life, whatever they were to the world they become everything to you. When you look them in the eyes, traveling to the depths of their souls and you say a million things without trace of a sound, you know that your own life is inevitable consumed within the rhythmic beatings of her very heart. We love them for a million reasons, No paper would do it justice. It is a thing not of the mind but of the heart.

This is a love chain letter. In 5 days you are supposed to send it to
25 people.It is easy, just look into chat rooms and find them. Anyway, send
it to 25 people in 5 days. Now here comes the fun part. You then say the name
of the person you like or love and then the person will say "I love you," or
"Will you go out with me?" NO JOKE!!!!!
! Now! ! the consequences:
The consequences are: If you break the chain letter, you will have bad
luck in future relationships. If you don't break the chain, then you will be a happy camper!!!

Congratulations! You have been chosen to participate in the LONGEST and the LUCKIEST chain letter on the Internet! Once read, this letter must IMMEDIATELY (meaning within the hour) be sent to 10 people. After you send it, make a wish and it will come true in the amount of time of days, as the time.
For example, if you sent it @ 8:00, your wish will come true in eight
YOU MAY NOT WAIT FOR A CERTAIN TIME TO SEND IT........ REMEMBER, IT MUST BE SENT WITHIN 5 DAYS, OR YOUR WISH WILL NOT COME TRUE! PLEASE CONTINUE IT NOW!!!
 
i like the rocks, pebbles, and sand one, i've seen the 10th grade, 11th grade etc. one, that's good, and the one where it says "close your eyes, it's rude to stare" one is funny too.
 
I'll Always Be There
In times of trouble,

In times of need,



You can count on me.

I will give you a wink,



Until you smile,

give you a hug ,



and stand by your side.

I'll be there for you till the end,



I'll always and forever, be your friend!

INSTANTLY WHEN YOU RECEIVE THIS,
YOU MUST SEND IT TO AT LEAST 10 FRIENDS,
If you are feeling SAD,

INCLUDING THE PERSON WHO SENT IT TO YOU!

GOODLUCK!

Something good will happen to u 2nite at 9:55 PM. This is not a joke. some1 will either call u or will talk to u online and say that they love u. do not break this chain. send this to 13 peple in the next 15 minutes good luck with ur crush

:rolleyes: yea right :lol:
 
TephieD said:
These are funny! Post more! :smiley:
yeah, we need people to post more of them! some forwards are really cute. and mandi, i find it hilarious that these forwards try to claim something bad will happen to me...and oh, there was this really cute forward about friends i loved, i'll try to see if i can find it
 
Alias Anna said:
i'm sorry, but i HATE forwards. i don't even read those felgercarb junk emails. i just delete them and move on...
i hate when i get the same ones over and over again, and the ones you have to send on to get luck or whatever, but these are funny, just jokes. you dont have to send them on or anything.
 
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