I have a beard!

Darrt

Cadet
I have a Beard that one day these Burians will rise up and live out the true meaning of its existance: To grow the longest beards. I have a Beard that one day on the shiny caverns of Stal-Hagen the sons of Burians and the sons of Ilvari will be able to sit down together at a table of beardlihood. I have a Beard that one day even the city of Oakhome, a forest state, sweltering with trees and other crappy plants, will be transformed into a mine of silver and gold. I have a Beard that my many children will one day live in a cave where they will not be judged by the length of their ears but by the length of their beard. I have a Beard today.

I have a Beard that one day Velzier Forest, whose animal's lips are presently dripping with the words of shaving and pointy ears, will be transformed into a situation where little Burian boys and Burian girls will be able to join hands with little Ilvari boys and Ilvari girls and walk together as sisters and brothers. I have a Beard today. I have a Beard that one day every mine shall be emptied, every tree and bush shall be felled, the rich places will be made poor, and the jungle places will be made clear, and the glory of the Takut shall be revealed, and all flesh shall see it together. This is our Beard. This is the Beard with which I return to the Forge. With this Beard we will be able to hew out of the mountain of Minerals a stone of mithril. With this Beard we will be able to transform the tiny goatees of Old Bloods into a beautiful symphony of beardhood. With this Beard we will be able to drink together, to kill together, to drink together, to go eat together, to drink together, knowing that we will be Bearded one day.

This will be the day when all of Takut's children will be able to sing with a new drunkenness, "Get out of here ye Beardless son of a pointy-eared faerie!" And if Beards are to be universal, this must become true. So let Beards grow from the tiny chins of our Qwi brethren. Let Beards grow from the gay pointy-eared Ilvari. Let Beards grow from the furry faces of the Suwari! Let Beards grow from the tainted peoples of the Togs! Let Beards grow from the wolvish of the Pack! But not only that; let Beards grow from undead jaws of the Lifeless creations of Necromancers! Let Beard grow from the metal jaws of 'Toks! Let beards grow from every chin and every face of Elanthia. From every head, let beards grow.

When we let Beards grow, when we let them grow from every face and every chin, from every zombie and every 'tok, we will be able to speed up that day when all of Takut's children, pointy-eared and un-, Qwi and Old blood, Ilvari and Suwari, will be able to join hands and drink ale in the old Burian mindset, "Drunk at last! Drunk at last! thank Takut, we are dru-" and then crash to the floor admist the bodies of unconcious losers of a drinking contest.
 
omg darrt just when you think you've seen the funniest/weirdest thing you will ever say you prove me wrong. That was great mate. Preach it dear reverand err Burian
 
I'm right there with you, Darrt, but it's certainly a dream of dreamers.

However, if it's any consolation, a mischievous qwi of necromantic inclinations shall one day uphold and defend all symbolism that is the bearded drunkenness of burians. Of that I am certain.
 
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