**I’m still here with you**

[i_love_you_mv]

I hope you like this sory it is short but ill update it regularly if i can. ... i hope its okay and not too sad. xx helen xx

Chapter 1

I hope those photos do you no harm and I’m sorry I can’t kiss you, but I love you and you are here in my heart. I promise you this; I will never forget you and I hope I am not forgotten by you either. It’s a sad night tonight; I know you will look up at the sky at some point, as it is too beautiful to miss. You are looking at it now, I can tell. Are the stars not so very pretty and bright this evening? I wish I could ask you this question right now, even though I already know your reply. You are lighting the candle now and it’s warming up my heart, even if I don’t know it. Curled up on the windowsill I hope that you are warm, your face is all blotchy from tears so I cannot tell whether your nose is red. Don’t stay there too long, you should sleep, the bed looks so warm. Almost the exact moment I think that you slide off the windowsill into the warmth of the duvet covers. You must have been cold as you are rubbing your hands together now, wrap up warm because I can’t be there to cradle you to sleep. I am singing our song in my head; I hope you can hear it in yours too. Why is your head in your hands and why are you crying so much? Brush away the tears, it isn’t your fault… nothing has ever been your fault, because you are so perfect. I wish that life was simple for you and I am sorry if I ruined everything. You are drifting off to sleep now and I hope I am not there in your dreams, because I want you to be happy and I know I can’t make you happy now. I can see you are deep in sleep now and I imagine there is a cold, empty spot in the bed next to you… I wish I could be there; but somehow I’m still here with you.

 

[<steph>]

i it... despite how sad it is.
and i alo love ur siggy. very cool.

but yes... its sooooo sad... esp:

wrap up warm because I can’t be there to cradle you to sleep. I am singing our song in my head; I hope you can hear it in yours too. Why is your head in your hands and why are you crying so much? Brush away the tears, it isn’t your fault… nothing has ever been your fault, because you are so perfect.
...
I want you to be happy and I know I can’t make you happy now. I can see you are deep in sleep now and I imagine there is a cold, empty spot in the bed next to you… I wish I could be there; but somehow I’m still here with you.

*sigh* its sooo sad. and cute. and i love it.
add me on the pm list, please.
(even tho i'll read it before )

~steph
xxx

 

[*AliasAngel*]

awwww... thats sad!!! pm please?

 

[German Muse]

So good!
I love it already, b/c I love angsty stories!
You write so poetic and yes very sad! laymusic:
Can´t wait for more , so can I plz get a PM?
I guess that was Vaughn thinking about Syd!

Muse

 

[i_love_you_mv]

PM list

cute_as_candy
*AliasAngel*
German Muse

 

[Syd_Vaughn 4ver]

awww! it's so sad! but it's good!!

can i be added to the pm list please? ^_^

lianne

 

[*AliasAngel*]

Im on the pm list!!!! wooot woooott pppaaaaarrrrttaaayy! ok... ill calm down now.

 

[tunita]

pm me please

 

[kellslawells]

Great stuff!
can i get a pm please?

 

[i_love_you_mv]

PM list

cute_as_candy
*AliasAngel*
German Muse
Syd_Vaughn 4ever
tunita
Kelly V

oh yer and im going to update later tonight... better get writing!

 

[i_love_you_mv]

the first chapter was Vaughns pov btw and this is Syds pov. sorry that i didnt make that clear... hope you didnt get confused. pls R&R xxx

Chapter 2

‘Vaughn… Vaughn, I’m here, mm, I’m sorry. Vaughn? Vaughn.’
It was just a dream… he isn’t here where I want him to be. I can’t have him anymore and it isn’t fair. Why me? Oh, it’s late I better get to work. What’s the point? I have nothing to get me through the day, yet somehow there is a voice pushing me on, pushing me forward towards happiness. I want to drag behind and curl up on my own, but this voice keeps me going and it’s enough. I will go to work; although I don’t communicate to anybody… I prefer to keep myself to myself. Haven’t been sent on a mission for a while… stuck behind a table all day is not fun: nothing is fun anymore. Maybe everything will change soon… I’ll have to wait until Friday… things could get better and maybe the voice will get louder and clearer and show me which direction to take my life next… maybe.
‘Hey Sydney, how are you today… better?’ that was Weiss; he tries his best to take care of me… I can take care of myself. I nod in reply to his question, faking a small smile.
‘Sydney… I know this is a difficult time, but I need to talk to you about arrangements for Friday? Have you planned anything? Those lines stabbed me straight in the heart forcing words out of my mouth.
‘I’ve sorted it all out, stop worrying about me. Sorry, I’ll see you on Friday.’ I didn’t mean to snap… it just came out. I hadn’t spoken to him since… mm and then I just shouted at him. I need time, but so does he… it’s hard for us all. I wish I had been there… if I could go back in time I would change it for the better… I could be a good person; I wish I had been there.

The day dragged on and yet again, no mission. It has been a week now and I am sure that I’m ready… I just need the confidence to talk to somebody and tell them that I can manage it. I’m sat at home, alone. This house seems so cold and empty, has done for a week. I don’t know how I am going to pull through this… I need a helping hand, please. When I think these words it’s as if somebody gives me the answer… the voice inside my head again, I suppose. I must sound so crazy; I am just telling the truth. Tomorrow is Friday… the day. I hope that everything has been arranged… I have tried my best. Every time I look at the clock, hours have passed and the house gets darker and darker. It is time I should light the candle, this is my favourite candle… a Christmas present from Michael. It is burning quickly tonight and the flame is dancing from side to side, yet there is no wind. It’s as if there is a presence. What am I thinking…? I must be going crazy. I should sleep… Weiss is picking me up at 9am and I have to look perfect.



**yer steph ive corrected myself!**

 

[<steph>]

i think this is sysd pov, not michael's.

i beat the pm
still loveeee it!

 

[German Muse]

‘Sydney… I know this is a difficult time, but I need to talk to you about arrangements for Friday? Have you planned anything? Those lines stabbed me straight in the heart forcing words out of my mouth.

[post="1077021"]<{POST_SNAPBACK}>[/post]​

What is on friday?
OK I have a assumption :blink: , but I hope I´m not right with that! :angry:

I just need the confidence to talk to somebody and tell them that I can manage it. I’m sat at home, alone. This house seems so cold and empty, has done for a week. I don’t know how I am going to pull through this…

[post="1077021"]<{POST_SNAPBACK}>[/post]​

Is Vaughn dead?
And friday is his funeral?
Am I close, plz say no!
OMG I so need an update!
Thanks for da PM!

Muse

 

[Cai]

Whoa whoa whoa... What's on Friday?! I need to know what's on Friday!! Muse isn't right, is she?

Oh yeah, and can I please be added to the pm list??

 

[i_love_you_mv]

PM list

cute_as_candy
*AliasAngel*
German Muse
Syd_Vaughn 4ever
tunita
Kelly V
Cai

ill update tomorow... promose. im kinda busy tonight with work.
you will find out when i next update... i wont tell you till then lol ...

 

[i_love_you_mv]

Chapter 3- Sydney’s Pov

Tick, tick, tick… time seemed to get slower every second. The sun was just rising from behind the white clouds, the colours vibrant and streaming through my bedroom window. Am I really going to be able to stand up in there and talk about him? I want to get some sleep… I still have a few hours before I need to leave and already I am dressed. The mirror reflects back a distorted image of me… black and grey. My world has crumbled and however hard I try I can’t seem to look right for today. At least I was wearing the dress. The dress; when I wore it, for the first time I had that closeness with him, and everything seemed to be ok. All the danger in my life seemed too much to handle, and then he came along.
I must have been sitting staring into that mirror for a long time. Weiss will be here in 5 minutes. There is no point in me putting on any eye make up, it will only smudge. A small amount of lip balm should do. Finally a spray of Poison perfume… that is how I feel; poisoned. Slowly and steadily my insides killing me… yet I am not dying and I have to live with that feeling in my heart for as long as I live.
That must be Weiss; I hope he is not wanting a conversation because I am not up for it, not yet.
‘Hello. We better get going.’
That is all he said, none of his usual chatter… I suppose he was Michael’s best friend. It is hard for us all.

‘This is the first time I have properly spoken since it happened, I am sorry if I have ignored any of you in the last few days… but I needed time. Michael… what can I say? He was one man that we could trust our lives with, but when it came to it… we weren’t there for him. Throughout life he taught me many things… to trust people who don’t seem trustworthy and to show your true feelings. If I had not shown my true feelings I would have never got together with Michael. The first date was a great memory; it was Valentines Day and I had gone to get the milk in and found a large parcel on the doorstep. Inside was a beautiful black dress, the one I am wearing today, and a red candle. That evening we went out to a restaurant in the perfect setting; from the balcony we could see out over the sea and watch the moon glisten in the sky and the stars made the evening even more magical. Michael wouldn’t want us to remember him in a sad way; he would want us to remember the happy times that we all shared together. Through the good times, the hard times and the bad times Michael was always there to pull me through and I am sure he did the same to many, if not all of you. Finally I want to play a song which Michael played to me at the end of our first date.’

I held in tears for the whole speech and now they really flowed down my face, streams and streams and as the music played they got worse and worse. I need you back Michael… I need you.
“I need a Hero. I’m holding out for a hero till the morning light…’
‘Sydney, it is time to see Michael now.’
‘Michael? Where?’ Oh I remember, I will need to prepare myself for this. I don’t look as good as I wanted to, my face is all blotchy from tears and my legs wobble every time I take a step.
Here you go Michael. Here is a lily just for you. I hope you can hear me wherever you are now and I hope you know that I will never stop loving you. Take this lily in your hand and I have to leave you now. It won’t be forever, at some point I will see you again. Until then you will be here with me wherever I go and whatever I do. Seeing your face saddens me, but I will remember the good times… you look so peaceful in your coffin. When you look down on me I will try and smile back at you. I love you Michael.



:: okay now nobody kill me because of what happened now ill run and hide. yer its but yer... sorry!!!! nobody kill me ::

pls r&r xxxxxxxxxxx

 

[<steph>]

The mirror reflects back a distorted image of me… black and grey.

awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwhhhhh... black and grey. like the clouds outside. :mellow:

is no point in me putting on any eye make up, it will only smudge. A small amount of lip balm should do. Finally a spray of Poison perfume… that is how I feel; poisoned. Slowly and steadily my insides killing me… yet I am not dying and I have to live with that feeling in my heart for as long as I live.

:sadangel:
:what: :what: :what:
awwwwhhh. she's alive. unlike my :vaughn1: i want him to be alive. can u make him an . well obviously, he's already an but somehow making him alive would be good

Through the good times, the hard times and the bad times Michael was always there to pull me through and I am sure he did the same to many, if not all of you

except maybe that haladki guy in s1. they didn't really get on... at all. :lol: but thats not the point. the point is... he made everyone happy. indeed he did. because he is lovely. and sydney loves him. yes she does.

I need you back Michael… I need you.
“I need a Hero. I’m holding out for a hero till the morning light…’

excellent song choice!! :band: laymusic: *sighs* so cute. i'm really loving the way u write this!
okay...final quote

Here is a lily just for you. I hope you can hear me wherever you are now and I hope you know that I will never stop loving you. Take this lily in your hand and I have to leave you now. It won’t be forever, at some point I will see you again. Until then you will be here with me wherever I go and whatever I do. Seeing your face saddens me, but I will remember the good times… you look so peaceful in your coffin. When you look down on me I will try and smile back at you.

**cries** is it really weird that i cry at this?! its so sad. love it.

okay... btw.. i beat the PM! great chapter, melonica! :lol:

~steph xxx

PS. no-ones going to kill you. come out of hiding! don't apologise. its great! nobody will kill you. xxx

 

[German Muse]

‘This is the first time I have properly spoken since it happened,

[post="1079955"]<{POST_SNAPBACK}>[/post]​

What happened?
This didn´t seemed like a CIA funeral at all, or not?

Michael… what can I say? He was one man that we could trust our lives with, but when it came to it… we weren’t there for him.

[post="1079955"]<{POST_SNAPBACK}>[/post]​

Oh no I wish I wasn´t right!
What did she said that?
There are so many questions on my mind now!
Were they married?
Do they have kids or is she pregnant?
How will you go on with this story and what´ll it be about?

Here you go Michael. Here is a lily just for you. I hope you can hear me wherever you are now and I hope you know that I will never stop loving you. Take this lily in your hand and I have to leave you now. It won’t be forever, at some point I will see you again.

[post="1079955"]<{POST_SNAPBACK}>[/post]​

So I guess he is really dead , I mean it´s an open coffin or he could be a double which I highly doubt!
Hey no need to hide, not at all! :nonono:
I your story, it´s so beautiful and sad!
Do you continue this story?
Thanks for da PM!

Muse

 

[Cai]

This can't be happening... Noooo, this can't be happening! *sobs* This isn't fairrrr! It was a good chapter though... Even if he's dead... *sniff*

Oh yeah, and one more thing? I'm on the pm list... But I didn't get a pm... At least I don't think I did...

Cai
x

 

[i_love_you_mv]

oh... i did send it to you... odd. yes i will be continuing with the story much to write about... how did he die. . . hehe sydneys life etcetc xxxx ill update tomorow night or saturday xxxxxxxxxx