ixx. how could i not
sark yawned as he woke up. sydney was still next to him, sleeping but not snuggled into him. he smiled and looked at her.
“god you’re gorgeous,” he whispered.
she was sound asleep. he just looked at her, watched her sleep. she was beautiful to him even in her sleep; her chest rising and falling with every breath; strands of her brown hair fell across her flawless freckled face. finally he couldn’t take it anymore and wrapped her in his arms.
she giggled slightly. “you woke me up.”
“i hope you don’t mind,” he whispered. “i needed to touch you.”
damn it, what are you doing? this isn’t what you are supposed to be doing. he scolded himself in his mind.
sydney giggled again, her eyes still closed.
“how’s your shoulder?” sark asked.
“it’s fine,” she sighed. “i can’t believe you shot me.”
“you’re still complaining about that?” he teased, kissing her gently.
she opened her eyes and smiled. “never thought i’d be in this position. in fact, i kind of hoped i wouldn’t.”
“so we’re having a confidence booster for breakfast?” he laughed.
“oh come on,” she said. “you know very well this isn’t a place i expected. you didn’t expect me here either. you’re cruel. you’re evil. you’re a bad man. i should punish you.”
“maybe you should,” he smirked.
“yeah,” sydney grinned. “maybe i should.”
“you son of a b****!” someone burst into the room.
“look i’m sorry. i told ms. derevko that she had to wait, but she—” harris started, racing in behind her.
“you nauseating, irresponsible—” she was still yelling.
“irina—” sark sighed.
“you obtuse moron!” she exclaimed. “that’s my daughter! my daughter! i’m going to kill you. you arrogant, pompous—”
“irina come on,” he cut in. “give me a break. at least let me wake up and get out of bed so we can actually have a discussion.”
“no. i’m going to kill you right there,” she replied. “you stupid, sick son of a—”
“shut up!” sydney yelled. “do you seriously think you have a say in whether i am here or not? go f*** yourself! i am not your daughter. and if i want to be here, i will be here. if i want to be with sark, i will. nothing you say or do can have any effect on that at all. in fact, you not wanting me to be with him makes me want to be with him even more. you disgust me. you think you can just waltz in here and be my mother. you abandoned me. you were the worst mother anyone could ask for. so don’t come in here yelling at sark for having me here. i chose to stay.”
irina just stared at her. sark burst out laughing, but immediately tried to hold it in when both sydney and irina glared at him. he choked his s******s back.
“come on,” he chuckled. “she just told you, told you, irina derevko, to go f*** yourself. and you have to let her because she’s your daughter. that’s humourous to me.”
“you chose to stay?” irina asked quietly, ignoring sark.
“what—you think i’m so weak he forced me to stay? you think i’d let him do that?” sydney scoffed. “of course i chose to stay. i couldn’t handle going back to l.a. i have no one there.”
“you have your father.”
“please. you ruined dad. he has nothing now. he keeps that letter that you left for him in his desk and reads it thirty times a day. he’s nothing anymore,” sydney said. “you destroyed him.”
“that was never my intention. i simply—” irina started.
“guess what? i don’t care. i don’t care what your intentions were. i don’t care if you do everything in life for me, for dad. i don’t care about you at all.”
“sydney,” sark said quietly, “maybe you should give her a chance.”
“give her a chance?” she asked. “what the hell sark?”
“irina, harris, leave for a second please.”
harris—who, looking slightly uncomfortable, was standing behind irina—did as he was told immediately. irina scoffed but stalked out of the room.
“look sydney,” he sighed, “if you are going to stay here you two have to at least be civil to each other. i work with her. so if you are going to work with me, you have to put up with her. deal with that. i’m not saying you have to love her or even like her or call her mom; you just have to deal with her for a while.”
he brushed a piece of her hair out of her face. sydney smiled.
“so now you want me to work with you?” she asked.
“i need you to work with me. i need you to stay here with me. after being with you for this long, how could i let you go? i couldn’t live without pissing you off,” he smirked.
“you’d miss the sex more,” she giggled.
“yeah,” sark nodded, grinning. “yeah i would…so you’ll at least be civil?”
“i’ll at least be civil,” she replied.
“go take a shower and give me a while with irina okay? harris brought up your bags. they are next to the closet.”
sydney nodded. “okay.”
she brought her lips to his. he pushed into her shoulder as he kissed her. she groaned and pulled away.
“***hole,” she scoffed as she stalked off to the bathroom.
sark smirked. he certainly did like pissing her off.
he pulled himself out of bed. he looked down at what he was wearing; still boxers, a wifebeater and socks. he chuckled. he knew it would piss irina off if he didn’t even bother to get dressed for her, so he went to talk to her without putting on any other clothes.
“harris please leave,” he asked, closing his bedroom door behind him. harris left. “irina, you can’t do that ever again.”
“that’s my daughter,” she growled but kept her voice low. “don’t tell me what i can and can’t do when you are spending nights in the same bed as my daughter. you—”
“seriously shut up,” he interrupted. “you can berate me all you want, but nothing is going to change. she’s here; she wants to work with me; i want her to work with me. this is what’s happening and you have to deal with it. i’m surprised you even know she’s here—you always said it hurt you too much to keep tabs on her.”
“that was before i learned that you had kidnapped her,” irina scoffed.
“well this is for real,” he said. “she’s here on her own accord. i was telling you the truth the other day when i said she had left. it just so happened that she came back that night. and after her shoulder heals, she’s going to become part of my operation.”
“what’s wrong with her shoulder?”
“i shot her.” it was a statement. “she was looking through my papers and i told her to put them down or i would shoot her. she didn’t put them down. i shot her.”
“i thought you cared about her,” irina said in an accusatory tone. “i thought she meant more to you than your business. i thought she was actually something important to you.”
“irina, please. i adore sydney. that doesn’t mean i’m not going to protect myself and my business when it comes to her involvement,” sark replied. “and you know very well that you would shoot jack if it came down to it.”
before irina could reply, sydney came out of the bedroom. she was just wearing jeans and a t-shirt, but both sark and irina were taken back by her beauty. she had her still-wet hair pulled into a loose ponytail, some hair slipped out to frame her face.
“sydney, can i talk to you for a moment?” sark asked.
she nodded and went back into the bedroom. sark closed the door behind them and pushed her against it, forcing his lips upon hers. he could feel her smile as she kissed him back. eventually he pulled away.
“you are so bloody fine,” he chuckled. “want to f*** right now? i’m sure it would leave a great impression on your mother.”
“as nice as that sounds,” she giggled as he kissed her neck, “i think we should get to work.”
“yeah,” he breathed. “we probably should.”
but he didn’t move. he just stood there, his arms wrapped around her, looking at her. she was so beautiful. i love you. he thought.
“let’s go,” sydney whispered. “irina’s probably getting pissed.”
“that just makes it all the better,” he chuckled.
she rolled her eyes and pushed him off. “i’m going.”
“well wait. what should i wear?” sark grinned.
“you’re going to make me dress you?” she scoffed.
“you know men, horrible fashion sense,” he laughed.
“just put on jeans and a button-down. it’ll really piss irina off if you don’t dress all fancy for her,” sydney laughed.
“that’s exactly what i thought.”
he quickly put on his clothes and followed her out the door, checking out her ass as her hips swung back and forth. irina scoffed when she saw what sark was looking at, but she didn’t say anything. she looked at sydney. sydney looked at her. it was very uncomfortable.
“so this is awkward,” sark stifled a chuckle. “maybe we should go eat breakfast. we can update sydney on our business relationship.”
“good idea,” sydney said, taking sark’s arm and leading the way downstairs.
sark knew that the only reason she had latched onto him was to make her mother angry, but it was okay with him. irina stalked behind them with disdain but didn’t say anything to show her annoyance.
before they reached the breakfast room, harris came racing in to stop them.
“mr. sark,” he was breathing heavily, as though he had been running for a while. there was an air of urgency in his voice. “we need to get out of here. now. cia found you.”
sark didn’t ask any questions.
“irina, empty the office. harris, the safe. sydney, stay here we’ll be back. hurry,” he instructed.
the three raced off in different directions. sydney just stood there. she was nervous, but she didn’t know what to do. she wanted to help. sark told you to stay put, so stay put. don’t do anything stupid now, she thought to herself.
sark sped back to his room. he grabbed sydney’s bags and his in-case-of-emergency-already-packed bags. he tore through the house and deleted all signs that he had another residence. he grabbed his computers and ran back downstairs.
harris was already there with sydney, holding a locked box in one hand and a key in the other.
“you got everything?” sark asked.
harris nodded. “john’s pulling up the car. there’s irina, let’s go.”
irina carried two boxes full of papers. “wait. sark, there’s another box.”
“i’ll get it,” sydney offered.
“no,” sark stopped her. “take the luggage, it will be lighter, and you can roll it. we don’t want to aggravate your shoulder.”
sydney was suspicious that that wasn’t the only reason he didn’t want her carrying his files, but she did as she was told.
“i’ll meet you guys in the car,” sark said, taking off for his office.
everyone piled into the sleek white escalade; sark in the driver’s seat and sydney next to him. harris and irina in the back. irina wasn’t happy that she wasn’t important enough to be in the front seat, but she didn’t argue.
“john, call everyone and clean up. if you can’t get everything out in time, destroy it,” sark instructed. “here’s a list of fake information you guys can give up if you are forced. good luck.”
“yes sir. you as well,” john said.
sark threw it into drive and took off. everyone’s adrenaline was pumping from the urgent getaway.
“do you think the escalade is really a good choice?” sydney asked. “i mean, isn’t it what you drove when you kidnapped me?”
“it changes plates every two weeks. and i’m going to have it repainted as soon as we get to our location,” sark replied.
“where are we going sark?” irina wondered. “my place?”
“no, we can’t risk it. if they have someone trailing us we can’t lead them from one headquarters to another,” he said. “we’ll go to my flat.”
“good idea,” irina agreed.
they drove in silence for a while. sark’s mansion had been far from other civilisation, and all of the roads were empty. sark was flying down them at ninety miles an hour, taking curves at fifty.
“harris,” sark said as he drove, “how do you know cia found us?”
“jonas called on my cell,” harris replied. “he said it was to risky to even call on the mansion’s line and didn’t want to call your cell just in case. word from him is that cia had found you and was planning a raid as soon as they could get a plane over here with bristow and vaughn on it. they are really pissed off that you have sydney.”
harris’s voice was much more confident than sydney had ever heard it before. it was as though being an important role in keeping sark’s operation safe had boosted his conviction.
“okay,” sark nodded to himself. “okay.”
“is there enough room at your flat for all of us?” sydney asked.
“there are two bedrooms and a couch,” he replied, indirectly answering her question.
“i’ll sleep on the floor if need be,” harris offered.
“that won’t be necessary,” sark said. “sydney and i can share a bed. irina will take the other. you can have the couch.”
irina clenched her teeth, fighting her anger. she couldn’t hold it down.
“julian, i think the way you are taunting me is immature and juvenile,” she snapped. “i understand that you are with my daughter and i don’t appreciate your weak attempts to anger me.”
sark was silent for a moment.
“irina, this is an important moment in ensuring the safety of our organisation. i was not trying to taunt you. i am a businessman, and this is business,” sark explained. “i don’t want harris sleeping on the floor because i can’t afford to have him sore and therefore slower than usual. i need everyone to be at the top of their game. you need everyone to be at the top of their game. we can’t afford anything less. so i was not being childish, i was being responsible.”
irina was silent this time. she hadn’t even taken that as a possibility. she just assumed that sark must have been doing it to piss her off. she berated herself in her mind because she knew she had made a mistake. she knew sark would make her admit it, so she did.
“i apologise,” she said quietly. “i made an assumption. it was a mistake.”
“don’t bother being sorry, just realise that not everything i do is to affect you in some way,” sark replied.
irina was mute; she was embarrassed. sark didn’t smirk; he had been telling the truth: what he had said was not to anger irina but was to make sure everything went well. he was too worried about his organisation to think of much else. that wasn’t true. he was too worried about losing sydney to think of much else.
***
within a few hours, irina, sark, sydney and harris were safely stowed at sark’s flat in london. they were quiet, all collected in the living room, no lights on.
“sark,” sydney said quietly, “they aren’t going to give up until they find me.”
“i know,” he replied. “i know.”
he was thinking. his life was swirling around him, threatening to disappear, and he didn’t know what to do. he closed his eyes and just thought.
“what happens if they come banging on the door in the middle of the night?” irina asked. “what are we going to do then?”
sydney sighed. “do you really think they are going to bother banging on the door? they’re just going to come in. there’s no way we can hide if they find the apartment.”
sark was silent for a moment. “if they come in the middle of the night, we’ll make enough of a distraction for irina to get away. that’s all that can be done.”
“sark,” irina looked at him, “don’t put me before yourself. you’ve never been like that before. what are you thinking?”
“if i try to escape, they’ll shoot me without blinking an eye,” sark replied. “if you try to escape, they’ll hesitate. they don’t want you dead. they need you alive. they’ll probably chase you instead of shooting you. i’m sure jack will go after you. that gives us a much better chance of getting away as well. and if you escape but we can’t, you’ve always been the mastermind when it comes to escape plans. you broke me out once, who’s to say you won’t do it again?”
“dad would go after you,” sydney said. “even before he came to me, he would go after you. you’ve become his obsession. he wouldn’t let anyone kill you. his first priority is most likely getting you instead of getting me. it would definitely give us a better chance to get away if he’s chasing you.”
“okay.”
“sir, should i have some of that fake information to give up?” harris asked. “just in case?”
sark shook his head. “you don’t need it. i’ve always kept you dressed like the standard twenty-four year-old. i have a background for you; i have a job for you; i have friends who call you harry. if you are a good enough actor to make them believe i am just an old friend who came to stay for the weekend, there’s no way they will think you work for me. everything is too good for them to have any reason to question it.”
“thank you sir,” he replied. “but i would like to stay with you and help. if i get caught and they release me, they’ll still keep an eye on me. i wouldn’t be able to work for you again.”
sark grinned. “you like me that much do you? don’t worry about it. we’ll find a way. but right now it’s getting late. i’m going to bed.”
“we all should. we need our rest, just in case,” sydney said.
the others mumbled in agreement and headed off to their beds for the night. harris crashed on the couch with a blanket pulled over him. irina went to the guest bedroom, and sark and sydney took the master.
“is this all my fault?” sydney asked, curling into sark.
he sighed. “no it’s not your fault. it’s my fault.”
“don’t take the blame. i know if i wasn’t here this wouldn’t be happening,” she said.
“if i didn’t want you here, you wouldn’t be here,” he replied. if i could control my bloody emotions, this wouldn’t be happening, he added to himself.
“it’s gonna be okay…”
sark couldn’t tell if sydney was telling him or asking him. he kissed her lightly on the forehead.
“it’s going to be okay,” he assured her.
she smiled and nestled into him. he tucked his arm around her and stared at the ceiling as she fell asleep.
you could get rid of her, he thought as he lay in bed, eyes wide open. give her back to the cia and you’d be safe. they’d be too happy with her back to worry about you, at least for a while. you could start a new life. just send her back……i can’t. i bloody can’t.
he was so angry at himself. since when had he, he, mr. sark, been unable to control his emotion? since when had he become so soft? why? he knew why. she was the reason for everything.
if you could just be a man and let her go this would all be fine. but no, you’re obsessed now. just like you were with her mother. what—do those women have something in their genes that you can’t ignore? does their d.n.a. predestine you to fall for them? you bloody moron.
he sighed. as much as he hated himself for it, he truly did care about her; he truly did love her. he looked at her sleeping beside him. she was so beautiful.
“i love you, gorgeous,” he whispered. “even in this life, how could i not love you?”
lover-ly. hope you like it. the next one will probably take a while to get out because meg's gonna edit a best of the best challenge fic for me. but more are coming i promise. i really like where it went. i hope you will too.
m-c