Comedy Late Night with Conan O'Brien


mrs. charlie
I heart the string dance and how he acts like a cat. The Texas Walker lever is genius lol The clip with Haley Joel Osment almost made me fall off my couch. For those of you who haven't seen it, a very young Haley is by Chuck Norris's side and he says, "Walker told me I have AIDS." I'm not saying that I find childern living with AIDS to be funny but just the randomness of the clip made and the audience burst into a fit of laughter. We're all going to hell.

This site Gunaxin Links : Fresh Hand-Picked Links Served Daily : Conanwalker.shtml has walker clips including the Haley one, which is clips 4 and clip 5 is what we've all been waiting for Norris vs. O'Brien lol


mrs. charlie
Here's an article that Conan had written for newsweek. I love it! For those of you who don't know, Conan and his wife Liza are expecting their second child in November! The man is a machine :lol: Their daughter Neve will turn 2 in October!

The Future of Television
Screens so small they fit inside coffee cups. Marriages arranged by TiVo. Production facilities on Mars. The king of late night peers into his plasma crystal ball.
By Conan O'Brien

May 30 issue - I have been on television for almost 12 years, and in that relatively short time I've seen the medium change exponentially. Naturally, this seismic upheaval has bred fear and uncertainty in our industry, but throughout it all I have remained calm. Like an old fisherman I have weathered countless storms and kept my tiny skiff afloat. And now, my face cracked and my nut-brown hands rubbed raw by the salt air, I know the mysteries of the inky deep. I've stared into the unblinking eye of modern television and I alone know her startling future.

To begin, the trend toward larger and larger televisions will continue as screens double in size every 18 months. Televisions will eventually grow so large that families will be forced to watch TV from outside their homes, peering in through the window. Random wolf attacks will make viewing more dangerous. And, just as televisions grow larger and more complicated, so will remote controls. In fact, changing channels will soon require people to literally jump from button to button. Trying to change the channel while simultaneously lowering the volume will require two people and will frequently lead to kinky sex.

We will also see a stunning increase in the number of televisions per household, as small TV displays are added to clocks, coffee makers and smoke detectors. Manufacturers will even place a small plasma screen inside car airbags so that accident victims will have something to watch while they wait for help. Toddlers' bowls will have a television at the bottom, and children will be encouraged to eat all of their mush so they can see Morley Safer. Televisions will even be placed inside books and, before long, books will evolve into no more than hundreds of small flat-screens stapled together. Reading the opening chapter of "Moby Dick" will include watching 10 hours of "Gunsmoke."

TiVo, the digital recorder with a brain, will continue to evolve with alarming speed. Super-TiVos will arrange marriages between like-minded viewers and will persuade mismatched couples to throw in the towel and start seeing other people. Tough-talking TiVos will even confront viewers, saying, "You've watched 40 straight hours of 'Sponge- Bob'—get off the weed!" One of TiVo's best loved features—its ability to provide viewers with commercial-free television—will inevitably force TV advertising to go extinct. As a result, celebrities will be forced to find new and creative ways to compromise their integrity. (At this moment, the writer pauses to slake his thirst with a delicious Diet Peach Snapple... now with less aspartame!) The sudden loss of ads on television will push many companies to stage their pitches live on Broadway, revitalizing the theater in America and garnering Patti LuPone a Tony award for her work with Geico.

Meanwhile, computers will continue to be used more and more to watch digital streaming video, eventually turning them into televisions. With no computers available to solve complex math problems, people will have no choice but to return to the abacus. Within a few months, this ancient device will be abandoned when it's realized that there is no good way to make "abacus porn."

However, these minor setbacks will soon be overshadowed by a stunning scientific achievement: Mars is finally explored and colonized simply because it's an even cheaper place to produce television shows than Canada. Producers cheer this cost-saving move but, typically, some New Yorkers complain when the latest "Law & Order" series depicts Manhattan as having a jagged red landscape and two small moons.

These stunning technological leaps will mean a demand for even more programming. Nostalgia shows like VH1's "I Love the '80s" and "I Love the '90s" will be forced to multiply, resulting in the smash hit "I Love That Thing That Happened Five Minutes Ago." Twenty-four-hour news channels, desperate for even more coverage, will conspire with NASA to alter Earth's orbit, creating a 25-hour day. Fox News's attempt to create a 26th hour will result in volcanic eruptions, and Bill O'Reilly will perish in a lava flow.

But it will be reality television that faces the greatest challenge. Viewer demand for more and better reality shows will lead to creative fatigue, and we'll know we're nearing the end with the premiere of "Survivor: Hackensack." As reality television becomes ubiquitous, being unknown becomes cool. Oprah proclaims that "Anonymity Is the New Fame," and the hottest new program is a worldwide search for someone who has never been on television. The winner, an 80-year-old Maori tribesman, is soon on every magazine cover and is spotted canoodling in the bar of the Four Seasons with Tara Reid.

But all of these changes will pale in comparison to the revolutionary explosion of late-night talk shows. As recently as 20 years ago, Johnny Carson was the only game in town, but as cable channels continue to pursue niche viewers, new hosts will continue to spring up at alarming rates. At first, the economy will surge as families build desks, fake windows and bandstands in their basements, but before long violence will erupt as the nation's supply of available talk-show guests begins to dwindle. Dr. Joyce Brothers, Fabio and Randy from "American Idol" will be airlifted to guest-starved areas to quell violence, but anecdote theft and consecutive Al Roker appearances will turn the Midwest into a battlefield. Order will be restored when the Supreme Court (led remarkably well by Chief Justice Judy) upholds the One Host, One Guest law in Philbin v. Ripa.

Finally, all of this technological and creative innovation will yield the ultimate Television Society. In an effort to bring Red and Blue states together, one giant plasma screen, four miles high, will rise from the central Plains, visible from both coasts. In accordance with the amended Constitution, the president will be the only one with the authority to touch the remote, which a nearby Marine will carry in a briefcase. Everyone will complain that there are a million channels on the Nebraska-Tron and nothing worth watching, but when the occasional prophet suggests turning the damn thing off, the nation collectively mutters something about "just another 20 minutes..."

And there you have it: the future of television. In fact, I am so sure I'm right about every detail that I encourage anyone with doubts to place this magazine in a vault and, 50 years from now, compare my vision to the world around you. If I've made even one mistake I'm certain the good people at NEWSWEEK, who never make mistakes, will refund you the price of this issue. Just don't come running to me. I'll be busy hosting a Manhattan-based talk show in the Planitia Crater, near the Martian equator.
© 2005 Newsweek, Inc.

© 2005

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It was just announced that Conan O'Brien signed with cable's Turner Broadcast System rather than broadcast TV's FOX Network.
How TBS Outfoxed FOX: Why Coco's Going to Cable
April 12, 2010, 3:36 PM EST
Conan O'Brien finds new home at TBS

By Josef Adalian

TBS stepped up. FOX took its time.

And that's why Conan is headed to cable.

This is a still-breaking story, but people close to the negotiations say that TBS's all-out assault on Team Coco ultimately led to O'Brien's decision to break off talks with FOX and sign with the cable network.

"FOX would've been great," a person familiar with the situation said. "There was probably a deal to be made, but in the middle of this whole process, TBS came in. And they were very aggressive."

Indeed, TBS wasn't even on the Coco radar until about three weeks ago. Conan's reps had heard the network was interested, but there were no talks.

But then the network's team began barraging O'Brien's reps, WME and Gavin Polone, with an all-out charm and sales offensive. That led to a meeting about two weeks ago, at WME's Beverly Hills, Calif., headquarters between O'Brien and top reps from Turner.

At FOX, Conan would be the guy the network was trying to make fit in, trying to sell to affiliates. At TBS, he'd be the center of the network's universe, a priority.

"We'll be a big deal at TBS. I don't know that we would've been a big deal at FOX," a source close to O'Brien's team said.

That said, there doesn't appear to be any animosity from Team Coco toward FOX. Or vice versa.

"Conan is a great talent and we wish him every success," the network said.

"The timing was just bad," a Conan insider explained, pointing to the slew of high-profile syndicated shows about to land on FOX-owned stations in coming years.


Shocker: Conan Headed Back to TV-- On TBS, Not Fox
By Josef Adalian
Published: April 12, 2010

You snooze, you lose: Conan O'Brien is bringing his late-night act to Time Warner-owned cable network TBS, breaking off talks with Fox and making plans to move to cable in November.

O'Brien and Fox had been engaged in serious discussions about launching a late-night show for months, with most indications pointing to a deal eventually getting done. But Fox had always indicated that an agreement came with serious limitations: Less money, no guarantee of wide affiliate clearances and little chance for O'Brien to own his own show.

And while Fox Entertainment executives made no secret of their desire to get O'Brien, other parts of News Corp. seemed agnostic at best -- consistently stressing that an agreement would have to make sense financially.

The comedy-focused TBS, by contrast, made it clear that it really, really wanted O'Brien -- and was willing to step up with a monster deal to land him. His new pact with the network will allow O'Brien to own his own show, a la David Letterman, while also giving him an eight-figure compensation package described as "bigger than any other deal he's ever had," one person familiar with the agreement said.

The news is being announced on the same day O'Brien opens a nationwide live comedy tour in Eugene, Oregon. It's also the opening day of the National Association of Broadcasters convention in Las Vegas -- ironic, given the shift of a major broadcast brand to the wired world.

“In three months I’ve gone from network television to Twitter to performing live in theaters, and now I’m headed to basic cable," O'Brien said. "My plan is working perfectly.”

O'Brien's new show, based in Los Angeles, is expected to air original episodes four nights a week, one night less than when he was on NBC but in line with the production pattern for Lopez, Jon Stewart and Jimmy Kimmel.

The deal with TBS the latest stunning development in what's been a nearly four-month rollercoaster ride for the artist now known as Coco. There'd been talk about O'Brien shifting to cable, but most of the buzz had him considering a shift to Comedy Central or FX.

In part, that's because TBS already has a late-night show, "Lopez Tonight," headlined by comic George Lopez. But Lopez called O'Brien last week to urge him to jump to TBS -- even though it meant Lopez's show would be bumped to midnight.

"Lopez Tonight" -- which skews young but has been a modest ratings performer, after a strong start -- has now been renewed for a second season. And virtually overnight, TBS has established a potentially powerful -- and paradigm-shifting -- late-night lineup.

“For decades, late-night TV has been dominated by broadcast television,” said Steve Koonin, president of Turner Entertainment Networks, calling O'Brien "the comedic voice for a generation" with a huge fan base. “Now, with a young audience and a growing late-night lineup, TBS is set to be the choice of comedy fans for years to come.”

And Turner could now own late-night viewers under 50: Its Cartoon Network is already tops in all of TV among adults 18-34 with "Adult Swim."

Lopez went out of his way to signal he was on board with being bumped.

"I can’t think of anything better than doing my show with Conan as my lead-in,” he said. “It’s the beginning of a new era in late-night comedy.”

News of the deal will no doubt come as setback for Fox's entertainment team, led by Peter Rice and Kevin Reilly. Both men had let it be known that they really wanted to be in business with O'Brien, and their inability to get a deal done could be seen as a sign that the once-bold Fox is now feeling more cautious about making bold plays.

The counter-spin to that, of course, is that Fox simply wasn't prepared to break the bank on a potentially risky move. Late-night ratings for all the broadcast networks are down, as is revenue. And numerous News Corp. insiders had been saying for weeks that an O'Brien deal would be a hard sell to affiliates, many of whom didn't want to give up lucrative repeats to help Fox further build its brand.

In the coming hours and days, look for both sides to spin just what went wrong in the courtship.