Love Me True

A/N

Okay, When I chose my pen name, I knew that eventually, I would write a Sark fic. Now, here it is. Don't get me wrong, I'm a true Sydney/Vaughn shipper but I think it's time that Sark gets in due. Hope you will give this story a try. Thanks.

:smiley:

CJ



Srachel2.jpg




Summary:

He had it all...Wealth, fame, success. But the emptiness aching inside him wouldn't subside. Watching TV coverage of Rachel Gibson's upcoming wedding, Julian Sark marveled at how she'd changed from the wild, free spirit he'd loved to the cool, proper socialist her powerful family had made her. But now, he had to see her again, and even her family couldn't stop him. Because if that boy whose hand she was holding wasn't the image of Julian at age five, he'd eat his Oscar!


Prologue

Maybe everybody was right after all. Maybe Julian Sark was too wild and too passionate and too damned stubborn for his own good.

Whatever.

Julian was too scared about Rachel to care one way or another.

The weather was a blustery and uncertain as his foul mood. It was raining intermittently. Every so often, , the moon would break out from its wispy cover and put a stop to the nonsense.

Julian was damn driving like a demon from hell. His knuckles shone like bright white bones as he whipped the steering wheel to the right and served his daddy’s battered Chevy onto the web hospital drive.

Massive and ink-black, the rectangular building looked as forbidden as a prison as it looked in stark relief above a black fringe of live-oak trees and was backlit by that violent, moon-dark, Texas sky.

Rachel was in there, somewhere…maybe dying.

Hi gut cramped in sick, demoralizing fear. Her powerful family would stop at nothing to keep him from seeing her.

Let them try.

He slammed on the brakes, get out of the car he’d taken without permission and ran, heedless of the soft rain that had begun to fall again, uncaring that he’d left the door wide open and the headlights blazing into the empty blackness like twin cones.

With a callused brown hand, he shielded his eyes against flashing red and white lights of an ambulance. More sirens screamed from the distant interstate, jarring him in his panicky confusion as he raced toward the E.R. entrance.

His mouth twisted when he spotted the same scowling deputy who’d all but accused him of killing Ben a week ago. Ben, his best friend; Ben, Rachel’s brother. Ben, whose lifeless head he’d cradled in his lap. Ben, whose grave he’d visited less than an hour ago to plead for for forgiveness.

Nod. Smile at the uniformed jerk. Stay cool.

Julian shot the officer a tense grin that must have passed muster. Then he shouldered his way through the sliding glass doors like a surly outlaw.

Inside, heads swirled as rain dripped off his blonde hair. He slicked the thick stuff back, out of his scaling eyes. A pretty teenager gasped coyly and then gave him one of those fluttery smiled all the girls gave him. He saw her father’s hand clench warningly on her slim shoulder and draw her out of Julian’s path.

Half boy, half man, Julian moved too fast, as if he hadn’t quite grown to his long, lean, rugged body. Still, he was hunky and gorgeous. His voracious sex appeal made him suspect with all parents and teachers, and with any other guy his age who had a girlfriend.

“You’re every teenage girls’ dream lover and every daddy’s worst nightmare, “Coach Howard had teased him when he’d been voted Most Handsome in high school.

“When I was your age I had pimples. I envy the hell out of you, kid. Looks like yours will open all sorta of doors.” The coach added with a smile.

Behind a cluttered desk a nurse ignored a stack of charts and blinking lights on her phone and licked pizza crust off her fingers.

But she couldn’t ignore him.

No women ever could, especially if he smiled.

But when he tried, the skin on either side if his mouth tightened painfully.

“Save the fake charm. Visiting hours are over, sonny.”

She obviously had a teenage daughter.

Julian froze.” Please, Ma’am…I’ve gotta find somebody…She’s really sick.”

The nurse shook her head in curt dismissal, sucked a last crumb, and then punched a button on her telephone to tend to more important business,

Julian’s cold wet hand grabbed the receiver from her.

“Rachel Gibson, “he rasped, suddenly seeming older and scarier than his twenty years. “The Senator’s daughter…What room is she in?”

“Your pretty face gas got you way too cocky, sonny. You may be hot stuff to some little girls foolish enough to go for tall, blonde hair and baby blue eyes, but that Gibson girl wouldn’t wipe her pretty feet on the likes of you…even if you did get her pregnant.”

His broad shoulders sagged. Julian’s tough stance wilted.

“Where?” He pleaded in s desperate, breathless voice, a boy’s voice now.

Her stare hardened, Then she seized the phone from him.

“Get outta of here, sonny, before you get yourself into real trouble. The Senator’s been down here. He told me about you and to be on the watch -out…”

When Julian didn’t bulge, she hollered off-handedly,

“Officer! It’s him! It’s that Julian Sark guy.”

Julian took off in a dead run.

So did the deputy.

As Julian sprinted like a crazed rat though a maze of endless white corridors, the big deputy lumbered at his heels.

The bastard would probably throw the book at him. Let him. All that mattered was finding Rachel…before it was too late.

Then Julian slammed through a double set of swinging doors only to find himself trapped in a dead-end hall on the seventh floor.

His heart beat like a tom-tom when he pivoted widely just as the deputy banged through the doors and smiled. Behind Julian, Senator Gibson’s voice thundered, “What the hell are you doing up here, Sark?”

“I came to see Rachel.” He said as he turned around.

“Over my dead body, punk.”

Shock and disapproval ripped though the grim clump of fashionably - dressed people standing outside Rachel’s door.

“You’re lying!”

Vaguely Julian was aware of her mother’s pitying gaze as he stumbled past her. Suddenly he fell that he moved in a weird slow motion. The white walls closed in on him like a surrealistic nightmare.

Was that frail, thin creature veiled in curtains and swaddled in white sheets like a mummy in that far corner really his lively Rachel?

The blinds were down. The room was gray and shadowy.

“Babe.. What have they done…”He chocked. His voice dried. “Oh, God…What have I done?”


TBC
 
great start !! i can't believe i read it though as i'm a die hard SV shipper but the story is good and well written!! :angelic:
can i have a pm ?
 
A/N

Only 1 review? Never happened to me before. Well, this makes me question if no one cares about this story or if I trully suck big time. Thanks Zaza for reviewing. Hope you enjoy. Next update will be on Monday.

:smiley:

CJ


~Part 1~

Her blue eyes that usually brightened at the sight of him, were dull and pain filled. Dark circles of grief and exhaustion ringed him. She stared at him as if he were a ghost. Then she twisted her head away from him and lay as still as death.

Even in this state, he thought she was the prettiest girl in the world. He sat down beside her and took her slim hand. A shock went through him. Her fingers cold and stiff and lifeless. Just as Ben’s had been.

“You okay, babe?” He asked, concern in his eyes.

“I’m fine, “she whispered.

Fine? Her tone cut him. Even after this, he would always hate that word.

There was scarcely a pulse beat in her slender, blue-veined wrist. Her icy skin almost translucent. She was so changed, so lifeless, fear squeezed his heart like a vice.

“Please…just go away, “she whispered in a strange almost thready voice.

He lifted her hand and laced his fingers through hers. “What about our baby?” He asked.

Her voice broke on a sob. “There is no baby.” She told him.

His own eyes filled with tears. Fighting them, he squeezed her hand and held on tightly. He gasped again. He felt like a drowning man with nothing to hold on to. “But…”

“Rachel.” He felt sick at his stomach and unable to breathe in the dark, airless room. “You listen to me. We’re still getting married…”

“No, “she said in a rehearsed , robot like tone. “I want to start over…fresh.”

“With some rich guy like Mark that your daddy…”

“Daddy says if this gets out, me having been pregnant, people won’t understand. They’ll judge him. He says that I’ve been difficult my whole life.”

“He’s difficult and demanding. Not you. You’re not supposed to be some perfect doll who follows all his orders. You’ll shrivel up and die…if you do that.”

“He says that this once I need to think about him and act like a normal daughter, that I have to do the predictable, respectable things, that I have to finish school…and…and forget about you.”

“Yeah. Well, you tell him it’s not that easy. Cause I won’t ever, ever forget you. And I won’t ever let you forget me, either.” He told her.

“Don’t make this harder, Julian. Please…if you and I hadn’t dated, Ben would still be alive.”

“Is that what they say? What he says?” He asked. A rage growing inside of him.

“I can’t hurt them any more than I already have, especially Daddy, especially right now.”

“It’s not like I planned Ben’s death or I wanted to get you pregnant, “Julian cried. I didn’t want to hurt either of you, I love you.”

He felt her fingertips flick through his thick, blonde hair that had probably dried into unruly tangles and then withdraw as if she were afraid to touch him because she wanted to so much.

“Daddy says I’ve gotten in more trouble than ten kids.”

“You haven’t gotten into nearly as much trouble as me, babe, “ he said, attempting his old teasing tone.

“Daddy says you’re a bad influence.” The soft finality in her stone-calm voice as she kept quoting her daddy killed something inside of him.

“I thought you loved me.” He said, pain evident in his eyes.

Slowly she unlaced their joined fingers and shut her eyes.

“Rachel?” He pleaded.

Tears leaked through her lashed and wet her white cheeks.

“Rachel…” He repeated.

She bit her lips.

“Don’t do this, babe. Don’t leave me. You know I can’t make it without you. You’re all I’ve got. All I ever want. You’re everything.” He begged.

The door opened. “Sark, you’ve had time with her. Now get the hell out of here before I have you arrested for trespassing.”

Her father was standing beside Mark Jackson in the doorway. Her other relatives were peering at him like he was some kind of wild beast they’d run to ground and were about to slaughter.

“You all think you know so much. You don’t know her. You’re killing her. You’re killing both of us.”

“Get out, Sark, before I lose my patience. You’re already cost me one child. You’d better leave quick ,boy, before I decide to use my considerable power to break you for what you’ve done to Rachel and this family.”

“Julian…” Her pleading whisper came from behind him. Julian turned back to Rachel. Her eyes were closed, and tears streamed silently down her cheeks. “ Go…”

He’d hurt her. He’d made her cry. Her family had never thought he was good enough for her. She’d always hated having to sneak around to see him. Now, because of Ben and the baby, they really hated him.

He’d lost her. How would he go on? He wasn’t rich or important like they were. She was everything to him. Everything.

More than anything, he wanted to take her into his arms and hold her till she stopped crying. He wanted to press his head into her breasts, to rock her back and forth, to never let her go. Georges Gibson would probably kill him if he touched her.

Julian tossed his head back at a cocky angle and swaggered past Gibson and Mark Jackson with the silent, insolent pride of a kid who had nothing else.

Julian didn’t know where he was going. Without Rachel, he didn’t care. All he knew was that he was leaving Texas. And he wasn’t coming back till he was rich and powerful as all of these arrogant bastards.

Then he’d make them pay.

TBC




~ Part 2~

6 Years later


A lot of smart people don’t believe in the Devil, but Rachel Gibson knew better. Because sure as shooting , the very same Devil who sent the snake to Eve also sent Julian Sark slithering her way. It was easy for other rich girls whose daddies were senators to be good. It was hard for Rachel.

Impossible when Julian was around. He brought out the worst in her. That’s why she’d fallen in love with him as a girl.

That’s why she was determined to forget him now that she was a full-grown woman on the verge of matrimony. Tall and broad-shouldered, blue-eyed and blonde-haired Julian had been born sinfully handsome. He’d been as smoldering intense as a box-office sensation years before he became one.

Maybe some seven-year old girls would not have found the various sort of devilment he proposed in his hideout as exciting as she. Not all would have thought it a lark to snatch the Reverend Scott’s wife lacy panties off her clothing line after Julian pointed out how they snapped like a fat pirate’s pantaloons in the wind. But then it never did fake much more than a sexy wink and devil-may care grin to show her how much more fun the crooked path with the likes of him was than the straight and narrow with more staid folk.

And now, six years after she’d given that gorgeous snake in hunk’s clothing up for good, whose scalding eyes should be burning a hole out of her television screen and setting her blood afire?

Ignore those coal-brick blue-eyes fringe with dense sable lashes.

Ignore how they make you feel singed to the core and shivery and alive for the first time in years.

Somehow the way Julian looked at her was more real than anything in her bedroom, more substantial than the blue cashmere blanket she was curled up on, more sensual than the glass of red wine and the tall, black bottle beside the untidy pile of bridal magazines stacked on her low table, more tantalizing than the red chiffon skirt that fell so softly over her long, shapely legs.

She stared at that shock of blonde hair tumbling across his brow, her wayward heart thumping as eagerly as a hungry rabbit’s who’d seen a carrot. Every time Julian whispered her name, she punched the pause button and gasped for breath,

Turn him off. Go to bed.

No way.

This wasn’t the first time her life had swerved disastrously off course because of Julian. Not that she was about to admit , even to herself, that it had.

One minute she had been a normal bride-to-be returning home from one of those stuffy society affairs. Bored and tired, she’d stepped into her vast bedroom suite with the familiar, rose wallpaper, high ceilings, antebellum furniture, and tall windows.

Then she’d punched a button on her answering machine and her mother’s shrill voice had jolted her into a new reality. Until then Rachel had convinced herself she really could marry Mark Jackson and make Daddy, who was up for re-election, very happy.

That was before Julian Sark, bad-boy movie star, had stomped back into her life with his usual vengeance. Except for Julian, nobody had ever known, least of all her parents, what to make of their mercurial, free-spirited, unpredictable daughter. As a baby, she’d gotten into so much mischief during naptime…like the afternoon she’d pushed a stool to the stove, stood on her tiptoes, and poured all the soap powder onto the kitchen floor and played in it like it was sand pile.


If the adult Rachel had a bad case of bridal jitters after her mother’s message, maybe it was natural under the circumstances.

It isn’t every night that your old boyfriend, who just happens to be the sexiest movie star in the universe, wins a Oscar and throws your life into a tailspin. Leave it to Julian to clasp that golden statuette to his heart and confess to millions in that low, chocked voice that he couldn’t forget her.

Not that she'd caught his memorable performance live. No, to please her mother she’d hosted a fund-raiser and had tapped the show. She’d come home exhausted only be drawn into Julian’s seductive web that little red message light.

Her mother had been frantic.

How come Julian Sark, the big, movie star, thanked you, you of all people? My daughter? How come you were unforgettable? You promised you wouldn’t see him again! Have you been in contact with him, Rachel Ann? Your father is very upset. Call me. We have to talk. Oh, this is your mother. I don’t care how late you get in. Call!”


Rachell hadn’t won her unpredictable, unusual stripes by doing what her mother told her. She yanked the phone off the hook, kicked off her high heels, and fast-forwarded the videotape. Sinking to the floor, she watched Julian collect his prize…over and over again, scarcely daring to breathe. Every time, he rasped her name and the world, unforgettable. In fact, even though she was headachy with exhaustion, she might have watched him again if a twig hadn’t scratched her barred window.

Her hand froze on the remote, her nerves responding on some instinctive, primitive level. With a keenly honed ear for danger she strained forward, listening to the night sounds outside the mansion. Only to see that it was just the wind rushing though the trees .

She jumped up, thinking to race to the hall to check on Nicky again.

The dark shape dissolved. Nothing was out there. They weren’t in any real danger as they had been two years ago, She reminded herself of the high fences surrounding the grounds, as the bodyguard patrolling the fences.

Unforgettable, rasped Julian’s low voice in her tired, incredulous brain.

Julian was the reason she was so jumpy. It had taken her years to get over him. Not that it was easy; he was America’s number one sex symbol. Posters of him in skin-tight black leather were plastered all over the world.

Julian doesn’t matter. Who cares what he said about you tonight on national television.

You are in Lousiana. A million miles away from him, a million worlds away from him. You are getting married. He’s a movie star. You’re a single mom. He forgot about you years ago.

TBC
 
A/N

It's Monday and as promised, here is a new update. I can't say I'm not disappointed that more people aren't reading my new story. I was hoping that people would give it a chance even if they aren't big fans of Sark and Rachel on the show. All I want to say is that Sark and Rachel in this story aren't anything like they are on the show. This is a true love story...even though there is a lot of angst in the beginning.


~ Part 3~

Rachel wasn’t used to wine, or the almost mystical clarity it can bring to confused thoughts and repressed emotions. Her cheeks were flushed. Her long-lashed blue eyes were misty as she felt things and knew things she’d refused to deal with…like the reason for the string of unsuitable boyfriends that had followed Julian till she’d finally settled on Mark.

Her father was worried about the upcoming election. She lifted a snapshot of Nicky and shivered at the thoughts of what Julian might do if he found out she had a son.

Not if.


When.

Men like Julian Sark should come with a warning labels tattooed on their foreheads at birth…too sexy to handle. Or danger…testosterone overload. Girls with too many hormones should be locked up in a nunnery till they were wise enough to deal with boys like Julian.

From the second he’d crawled out of his cradle and cast his moody-broody, blue eyes on Rachel, who’d lived on the ranch next to his, he had oozed way too much charm for a girl of her madcap, irreverent nature to resist.

Six years ago, Rachel had finally come to her senses and had told him to get out of her life or else…or else being a father. Until tonight, when Julian had seared her with his megawatt, know-it-all grin and thanked her…her…on live television, she would have sworn they were through with each other forever.

After all, she was marrying the man of her father’s dreams in a week.

After all, Julian had made tabloids headlines recently by fishing the world’s most gorgeous supermodel naked out of his swimming pool.

But Julian had cradled his Oscar to his chest like a baby as he’d hunched over the podium and thanked first the Academy, his agent, and his director. Julian had gone blank for a second. Then he’d thanked her, Rachel, the girl from his past , instead of Lady Godiva of the tabloids.

He’d said she was unforgettable.

Dear God. Rachel didn’t want anything Julian Sark said or did to affect her ever again. His charm was superficial; his taste in women trashy.

Rachel was an heiress, a retired journalist, a philanthropist, a mother. Her fairy-tale life was perfect without him.

Right.

Her life was a charade. She was such a consummate actress, she sometimes fooled even herself.

Static flickered on the silent screen of Rachel’s television.

Why had she taped the Academy Awards show tonight, of all nights, when she had known Julian was up for Best Actor?

Why hadn’t she ignored her messages and gone to bed? Why wouldn’t his raspy voice stop inside her brain?

Why? Why? Why? Nothing about her feelings for Julian had ever made sense. Except they were intense. So intense, she’d been running from them for years.

Thus, Rachel sat huddled in a ball of misery beside the low table in her bedroom chewing the red nail polish off her long fingernails as she obsessed about Julian. Without thinking she slid two photographs together on the polished oak surface so that the smiling faces of the identical little boys lay side by side.

At the startling resemblance, she whitened. Same blue eyes and Devil-may-care grins.

Now that she was moving back to Texas, sooner or later, Julian was bound to find out. She understood her fear. But she didn’t want to think about why Julian had stirred her so deeply on other levels.

Rachel Ann, promise us you won’t ever tell Julian about Nicky.

Her parents and Julia had looked so white and stricken as they’d stood beside Nicky’s crib that she’d promised…again.

Rachel’s long, golden, straight hair was swept away from her solemn face into an elegant chignon. Her mother’s diamond glittering at her throat. With her bare feet tucked beneath the red gown and her lips free of lipstick, she looked more like the disheveled wild-child Julian had loved than the sophisticated young woman of society at the fund-raiser.

Images, especially those on films, always affected her too profoundly. The particular pictures that quickened her pulse were of five-year-old boys with curly blonde hair and blue eyes that flashed with mischief as they dangled upside down from a tree.

A stranger would have thought the pictures were of the same boy. But Rachel had taken one twenty years ago beside the clear waters of a spring-fed creek in central Texas and the other only yesterday on the muddy bank of the brown bayou in her backyard,

A stillness descended upon her as she touched the yellowed photograph of the boy in ragged cutoffs.

“Julian…”

He’d been an innocent boy then. Tonight, the man had seemed painfully bitter and edgily dangerous.

When she brought his picture to her lips, a single tear traced down her cheek.

Once the only man for her had been Julian Sark. Julian who kissed with his eyes closed. Julian, who was a bad boy by day but whose face was as innocent as an angel’s when he slept.

Julian’s teasing blue eyes that had always looked straight into hers and recognized her true self.

The soft, damp Louisiana air was warm and scented with roses and rain as it sifted across the wide verandas of Belle Christine, once her grandmother’s home, now hers. Perhaps it was the antebellum mansion standing proudly on its slight rise behind the Mississippi’s levee, surrounded by ancient live oaks dripping with moss, that made Rachel feel not only her fear but the past and Julian’s appeal so keenly. For old houses have a timelessness, a link to the past, that modern homes lack. Suddenly the poor, ambitious boy with head full of dreams seemed far more real to her than the polished mahogany surface of the antique desk beside her canopy bed or the bladelike leaves of the banana trees rustling outside against the exterior walls of her home.

Julian.

Again she was seventeen and the torn leather upholstery on the backseat of Julian’s ancient Chevy was scratching her bare thighs. Julian’s hands fumbled with the buttons of her blouse while his hot mouth explored the sweet mysteries of her body. For as long as she could remember, the high-born Rachel Gibson had felt the lowborn Julian Sark pulsing in her blood.

Forget him.

Your love from him nearly destroyed you and everybody you loved.

At twenty-six, Rachel was beautiful, rich, and envied by all. She was high society. Big rich. Texas royalty. Her father, who put money and power above all else, had set up a trust fund for her so she would never have to worry about money again and her solid bridegroom was ambitious.

But there was a shadow-side to her seemingly perfect life. A childhood illness had taken her older sister, Alison, when she was ten; later, her brother Ben, had died in a car wreck. As her parents’ sole surviving child, Rachel felt enormous pressure to make them happy. But what about her?

TBC

Pm List: Thanks to the 3 of you. Next update Wednesday.

les400coups
VAughnsgurl4lf
tubby

 
love is in the air... :rolleyes: i'm sure they're gonna reunite and he's gonna find out and they'll live happyly ever after.. LOL !! daydream believer, here i am !! :blush:
 
A/N

It's Wednesday and as promised, here are 2 more updates. These 2 chapters and the 2 next ones are simply to take a look at how they fell in love and how they have spent the last 6 years apart.

If you are wondering when Julian will appear? Come on, I know you are. :P

Here's a little scoop: We'll have Julian's side of the story in the next 2 chapters (which will be posted this Friday) and then our Dear Julian will make his way back to Texas in time for Rachel's wedding. Will he stop her in time?

Thanks to all of you who are reading and reviewing. It means a lot to me. :lovely: CJ

On with the show: :whistle:


~Part 4~

In her third year as a photojournalist, Rachel had taken a picture that had won her a Pulitzer. But the coveted prize should have made her career, had ended it. When she’d announced her retirement, jealous colleagues had been exultant. Her family had been equally thrilled. Only Julian had called her to ask what was wrong. Shaking, she’d slammed the phone down. When it had run again, she’d run outside to avoid hearing it.

She twisted her diamond engagement ring till it cut her finger. She had to put Julian out of her mind.

Most girls would have given anything to be marrying Mark. Her mother kept telling her that marriage would complete her as her career hadn’t. Thus, when Mark, who was older and wiser, had led her into the purple shade of the camphor tree in her rose garden, she had not resisted when his arrogant gaze had held hers while his cold hands slipped an engagement ring on her finger.

Mark had bought a house high in the hills overlooking Austin and signed the deed over to her as a wedding gift. He had given her carte blanche with the finest decorator in Texas. Her thrilled mother had since taken charge.

Numbly Rachel had addressed a thousand engraved wedding invitations. Ten bridesmaids’ dresses had been moon in Maui. Julia had obtained a sabbatical from her work to care for Nicky during the wedding festivities and honeymoon.

Everybody told Rachel she was the luckiest girl alive. She sucked in a quick breath, picked up the VCR remote control, and defiantly jabbed Rewind, pausing on Julian’s face. For a long moment, she stared at the television, her glazed, intense emotions blinding her so that she saw nothing and heard nothing. Somehow in that crushing silence as Julian’s features wobbled, invisible defenses inside her began to crumble.

She had fallen in love with Julian years before their adventures in his Chevy. When she was five he’d invited her to his hideout and seduced her into that game of doctor that had resulted in endless lectures from her mother and father, who had told her Julian was worse than his drunken father.

Btu Julian had been too much fun to resist. Despite their fathers. Rachel’s clandestine friendship with Julian had blossomed into love.

Then Ben had died, and so had her world.

Later, after Julian had become a world-famous movie star. She’d figured he’d forgotten her. Even when Julian had returned to Wimberley, the town they’d grown up in, and started buying land despite her own powerful father’s attempt to stop him, she’d clung to that illusion. Hadn’t he snubbed her the two times she’d seen him on the town square?

Then tonight, in front of millions, Julian had gone and done this wild and crazy thing that touched her wild and crazy heart.

Rachel’s frantic gaze swept to her white, virginal wedding dress and its faux Renaissance beaded bridal cap and veil which hung in a plastic bag on a high hook above half a dozen hand-tooled leather suitcases. Next she looked at her camera equipment, stacked in a separate pile of black duffel bags in a distant corner since she was unsure about taking them.

All was in readiness for the long drive to the Texas hill country tomorrow.

Rachel tipped the wine bottle and refilled her goblet for the fourth time. She barely felt the thin, cool crystal against her lips; barely tasted the warm red that slid too easily down her throat.

Tears pooled in her blue eyes as she touched the play button.

Dear God, why am I doing this to myself?

It’s 2:00 am. I’ve got a long drive tomorrow. And I’m not a morning person.


Rachel’s head throbbed. She felt tense and achy. Four photographs albums from her high school days, loose pictures, mostly of Julian, spilling out of them had brought back the past, had made her weepily nostalgic. Julian had loved her. Truly loved her.

Go to bed.

She shook her bright head and gripped the remote control.

Play it again, Sam…

Rachel was still trembling when Julian Sark’s molten image blazed into focus.

Lord. He was magic on film. She was the first to be bowled over by him, to capture his special magic with a camera. If ever a rugged, male face was created to arouse and seductively provoke the female mating instinct, Julian’s was.

He’s trash. Like his father.

But as irresistible as dark, gooey chocolate.


Dusky skin stretched over ruthless, rawboned features. And, oh, why had God given him that sensual, kissable mouth that could tempt a girl to madness? Even on television Julian’s intense, blue eyes burned too deeply and too hotly. His devastatingly bitter smile saw through her rich girl defenses and made her pulse skitter.

Get a life.

He’ll hurt you again; hurt your family; hurt Nicky even more.

You belong to Mark.


Rachel stared wordlessly at Julian whose short hair was curled at the nape of his neck. The tuxedo accentuated the breadth of his powerful shoulders and the narrowness of his waist. She was keenly aware of dangerous, sinewy muscles rippling beneath well-cut cloth.

The rough boy she’d loved was gone. This new, older, elegant version was somehow leaner, meaner, smoother, tougher. A darkness had entered this man’s soul and was etched into the hard planes of his arrogant face. He had played pirates, bikers, gypsies, warriors, mercenaries…irreverent, unrepentant scoundrels all of them. This battle-worn giant who lit big screens with his smoldering love scenes and know-it-all smiled was a stranger.

So, why after all these years could the mere sight of this embittered warrior and his saying she was unforgettable make her head pound and her womb ache? Her throat go dry? Her brain go comatose?

His raspy voice mocked her.

No more wine for you, babe.

If only he didn’t look so much like her darling Nicky. Their uncanny resemblance turned her skin to gooseflesh. Beneath dark, slashing brows, Julian’s baby blue eyes seared and seduced her. His gaze lured her with promises even as he kept his own dangerous secrets.

Rachel’s palms grew clammy.

No more dangerous than her own secrets.


TBC


~ Part 5~

His companion of the night, supermodel Daniella Wolfe, was slim and tall. With masses of gold ringlets and huge blue eyes, Daniella meant to dazzle.

She looks like me. Why do his girlfriends always look like me?

Again Julian’s roughened voice scoffed. Don’t flatter yourself, babe. What’s it to you if I dig leggy blondes?

Rachel’s head buzzed when Julian leaned too far back in his seat just like he’d done in high school to taunt the teachers when he hadn’t known the answers. His gorgeous mouth curled into that same cocky smile he’d worn when her rich crowd had snubbed him because of his bad clothes.

Even if you won’t tell your father about us, you aren’t ever going to forget me, Rachel Gibson…or what we did together…in bed…in the woods…in my hideout.

Her hands fisted against her chiffon-clad thigh. Yes, I will. I will, too, forget you, Julian. I have forgotten…

God created me just for you, babe.

“Maybe the devil put a hex on me, “she replied sassily.

The reverend once called me the devil’s spawn. You’re mine.

Julian had been the first boy to kiss Rachel full on the mouth. The first boy to French kiss her. Indeed, he had claimed plenty of those long, wet kisses before seducing Rachel when she’d been a naïve seventeen. At eighteen, he’d been a virgin, too. There had been lots of firsts with Julian.

Lots of firsts. Lots of only’s.

From what she’d read in the tabloids, Julian no longer discriminated when it came to women. He had a revolving bedroom door. He was Hollywood’s sexiest , reigning super stud.

So…that’s his business!

The next camera shot zoomed in on the number one sex goddess who stood up on the stage holding an envelope. Strobe lights flashed behind her. The world-famous actress whit the little girl voice looked like she’d poured her voluptuous body into a sequined, tube like black gown that was slit to her navel. Beside her towered the biggest cowboy star in the business.

The long slim envelope was ripped open.

“…the nominees for Best Actor are…”

Rachel gripped the remote control harder as the names of films and stars were read in the actress’s feather-soft tone.

“…the winner is…”

Applause exploded in the auditorium, drowning out the end of her sentence.

Julian’s name pulsed through Rachel as she lifted her empty wineglass and then set it down, resisting the temptation to refill it again.

Now. Now he would go white with shock and then swagger up to the stage into the camera with his bleak, level gaze and say it.

Rachel’s breath stalled in her lungs.

No more. Turn it off. Don’t put yourself through it again
. The camera followed the tall, gorgeous man striding down the aisle with panther like grace in his elegant tux. The audience rose and gave him a thundering ovation.

Rachel’s blood heated in anticipation.

You got it bad, babe.

Still, her blue eyes remained glued to his powerful image.

The moment she had been waiting for came all too soon. After thanking the Academy, his agent, and his director, Julian grew quiet. For a long, intense moment, he continued to stand before his spellbound audience. He shifted his weight from one foot to the other, As his silence lengthened, he looked odd and blank-faced and suddenly very ill at ease. His dark face paled. Hard lines bracketed his mouth. His grip tightened threateningly on his gold-plated statuette.

For a tough guy, he sure looked afraid.

Every bit as afraid as he’d looked that night in the hospital.

Still, without speaking ,he leaned into the mike. Glaring white light bathed his chiseled features. A muscle in his tanned cheek twitched as if long-suppressed emotions raged so close to the surface he couldn’t hold them back.

Then his cynical gaze targeted her, and his deep raspy voice wrapped her. For an instant he was that unsure, cocky boy she’d loved, and they were the only two people in the world.

Terror gripped her. Once that special, measured look had been meant for her alone. The only time she’d ever seen his hard features go still like that was right before he shut his eyes to kiss her. As he stared at the cameras, he broke into that special smile that had belonged only to her.

The smile died.

“I wish I had someone in my personal life to thank . But I don’t. God, here I am. You’d think I was the luckiest guy alive. But hell…I’m probably the loneliest.”

He had been a lonely little boy, too.

Julian had been bean-pole skinny in ragged, dirty jeans that always rode too high on his ankles. Scorned by the teachers, ridiculed by the other kids. She remembered the way he’d sat hunched over in the back of the classroom , reading books he’d checked out of the school library to escape the bitter reality of his childhood.

The man on television stood up straighter. His deep tone roughened. His fathomless blue eyes bored into her. “But there is someone…someone who has proved to be…unforgettable, So, Rachel…Babe, if you’re out there, I’m gonna thank you right now because I may never get another chance to. You were the first person to ever believe in me. The only real…I wish…we could go back and start…” He sounded chocked.
“Oh, God…”

Flushing darkly, he turned to the half-naked goddess in the slit gown. “I’m making one helluva fool of myself over a woman who threw…” Then, as if he suddenly realized the magnitude of what he’d so publicly revealed on stage. The crowd stood up and cheered him as he ran for cover. The only person not standing and clapping was the breathtaking Daniella. When he sat down beside her and reached for her hand, she snatched it away to finger the diamonds at her throat.

Rachel’s eyes were burning as she punched the remote, freezing Julian’s stark visage on her screen.

Indomitable pride was carved into his strong, handsome face. Stubborn rebellion. But there was anguish, too. His genuine pain wrapped around her heart and wouldn’t let go. She felt a shuddering deep within herself.

Both her parents and the town that had grown up in had despised him for being Jonathan Sark’s son. Julian had felt less than nothing in that town. Maybe now he had the world’s acclaim, but tonight she had seen an even deeper pain in his eyes that she’d seen when she’d told him goodbye in the hospital.

Don’t do this, babe. don’t leave me. You know I can’t make it without you.

Her grief and guilt over Ben had been so profound, she’d blocked out his pain.

Thank God, he’d made it…without her.

Rachel wanted to call him and congratulate him.”

No.

He’d called her, hadn’t he, when she’d won the…

When he’d asked her what was wrong, she’d hung up on him. He’d called back. She’d hadn’t picked up, but when he’d rasped his number into her recorder, she’d written it down.

There had been nights when she’d pulled it out and looked at it as if it were some last link to him.

Quit staring at that oversexed, conceited, rebellious, hot-blooded man who couldn’t keep his hands out of your pants. Don’t even think about calling him.

You can’t stop thinking about me, babe. If you marry anybody but me…I’ll haunt you in your bed. There’ll be three of us on your wedding night…

Funny, how every time she kissed Mark, that obnoxious raspy voice of Julian’s started heckling her.

He doesn’t quite have my charm, now does he, babe?

But that would stop.

She was going to do what was expected of her for once and be happy about it. The well-ordered structure of Mark’s life would smooth any rough edges in her being. Nicky , who had been asking why he didn’t have a father, would have one. Julia could relax and give her entire soul to her chosen career. Rachel’s parents would be thrilled to have her respectably married.

A shadow passed over her face as she thought of how much her mother and father had suffered. It was up to her to make it up to them.

But her tears wouldn’t quit as she stared as the torture in Julian’s frozen face.

Julian had been able to read her heart and her forbidden fantasies with unerring accuracy. Once his wild, quirky soul had been a perfect match for hers. He had been her best friend. He had shared every thoughts that was in his heart as Mark, who worked long hours at his law practice never did.

That was then.

This is now.

Her love for Julian had come at a terrible price.

Julian was an image; Mark was substance. hadn’t her career taught her the terrible danger of confusing the two?

Julian’s bedroom exploits in Hollywood were legendary. Mark was decent and reliable. He respected her. A happy marriage took time, work, commitment, and compromise. Sex appeal was the least important ingredient. She wanted to be safe. Mark was safe.

What about love? Rasped that forbidden voice.

What about Nicky?

What would happen when Julian found out about Nicky?


TBC


Next update: Don't miss Julian's side of the story This Friday.


Pm List: Thanks guys, it means a lot to me. These ones are for you!

les400coups
vaughnsgurl4lf
tubby
Stella1
xMountineer02300844x
 
FIRST!!!! :D

That was a lot of writing. There is like so many unanswered questions I have, that I'll just wait until Friday to find out the answers to. I am already imagining Sark's response to Nicky....YIKES! Thank you for the PM.

-Erin :smiley:
 
So when I saw this was Sark and Rachel, I thought BLAH!! But I decided to read it, and I LOVE it!!! It is AWESOME!! So much emotion. Excellant writing and update soon. Rachel better call him!
 
that was great
sorry it took me so long to reply, i had an assignment that i had to finish yesterday
thanks for the pm

that was great
sorry it took me so long to reply, i had an assignment that i had to finish yesterday
thanks for the pm
 
A/N

It's Friday! As promised, here are the new upates. Hope you enjoy. Have a great weekend and next update will be on Monday.

:smiley:

CJ


A/N

It's Friday! That means time for a new update. Hope you'll enjoy. I just want to say Thank You to all my reviewers. Without you guys, I don't think I would have continued writing this fic. Have a good weekend and next update will be on Monday.

:smiley:

CJ


~ Part 6~

Julian. Daniella. Mac.

Superstar. Supermodel. Super agent.

The fallout from what Julian had said and done on stage surrounded the three passengers in the stretch limo like a poisonous gas as they sped through the night. Mac’s handsome back face smoldered with enigmatic misery as he stared out the window at the whizzing headlights.

If Julian was red-faced and guilty with self-loathing, Daniella’s dark silence was equally oppressive as the sleek, black care pulled in front of L.A. trendiest restaurant where Mac was throwing Julian a party.

Her dark brows knitting, Daniella turned on Julian. Then the screaming crowd rushed the car, their hoarse cries drowning out her outburst.

Thank God. Julian was in no mood for another tongue-lashing.

Julian had slouched against the door while Mac tried to cajole Danny out of her mood by praising her latest Vogue cover, but she’d stiffened and notched her exquisite nose even higher.

Finally, even Mac lost his patience. “Honey, give him a break. He’s gonna have a hard time living that sappy speech down.”

Daniella’s glossily painted mouth had tightened. “His fans love it! Poor, poor Julian, pining for some long-lost love. How does that make me look?”

Julian had had it with Daniella. She hadn’t even waited for the ceremony to end before she’d attacked.

As if he didn’t despise himself enough. He didn’t know why he’d thanked Rachel. She was the last person he should have mentioned. She was marrying Mark Jackson. He didn’t give a damn about her anymore.

This was suppose to be the happiest night of his life. Instead, he’d stood on that stage, drinking in the applause, feeling the heat of the lights only to wonder why he felt no rush of exhilaration. He’d come so far, in such a short time. No way would he ever forget growing up as the town drunk’s son, of his jobs as dishwasher, waiter, and bouncer. Or the lousy apartments in dangerous neighborhoods, or that awful opening night when he’d sunk so low he’d stripped naked in that back-alley play and then lost his nerve and leapt offstage. A producer had chased him with a video camera and caught a full frontal view as Julian had grabbed a lady’s sweater and jammed it against his crotch while she shrieked. From time to time that clip was still playing.

But Mac had been in the audience that night and had thought Julian was magic. Mac had tracked him down, gone to his apartment and rammed a fist on the front door.

“Who the hell are you?” Julian had demanded, putting the chain on at the sight of the huge, muscular black man looming in his doorway.

“Your agent.”

“I’m through acting.”

“Can we discuss that?” Mac’s bright grin had been infectious. “You impressed me in Hanging Out.”

“You’re impressing the hell out of my downstairs neighbor.”

Mac’s dark face paled when he saw the plump little girl in black pigtails squatting on the top step, her big black eyes popping out on stems.

Mac glowered. “Quit eyeballing me, girl. Go beat a drum or play with a doll…”

“Selena, “her mother yelled. “Get in here now.”

Defiantly Selena marched down the stairs. When Mac stuck out his tongue and waggled fingers over his ears, she ran to her mother.

“Mama! There’s a man out here scaring me!”

“You gonna let me in before that woman calls the cops and they haul me to jail?”

Gut instinct made Julian lift the chain.

“How’d you know Selena’s a drummer?”

“I’ve got three rug rats of my own.”

“You’re married?”

“To my high school sweetheart.”

“True love…in this city?”

“Tanya keeps me sane in this insane business.”

Julian cracked the door wider. “I won’t ever take my clothes off for a part again.”

“How about a beer?”

They’d talked for hours. Mac had sworn he could make a big difference in Julian’s career, and he had. Mac had see that he met the right people, had taught him to quit overacting

“Read the part a time or two, no more, “Mac had commanded in his cullying, enthusiastic way. “Then just get out there and wing it. What you’ve got to do is play along with the other actors. Live it when you do it. don’t think so much. You’re a natural.”

Because of Mac and Tanya, who were overzealous about handling every aspect of Julian’s life…his mood, his women and his money…Julian was at the top.

But other than Mac and Tanya and their kids, Julian had no real friends. Suddenly on stage tonight he’d felt so alone and empty as he had at the bottom, maybe lonelier.

Mac and Tanya had each other. Sometimes their happiness made him even more aware of what was missing. Maybe that was why he’d started buying land in Texas.

“You could have thanked me up there.” Daniella had said to Julian in the limo.

“God. Everything, everything was always about her.

“So…Thanks.” Julian bit out the word.

“You treat me like I’m nothing to you, Julian.”
“He sleeps with you, doesn’t he?” Mac inserted.

Julian flinched and hoped Mack wouldn’t catch the subtext in Danny’s sudden silence and sly look.

What the hell was wrong with him? He was supposed to be a Hollywood superstud. Danny was one of the most beautiful women in the world. And he had no interest in sex. Before her, he’d dated girls a night or two, always dropping them when they demanded to be more than a decoration on his arm.

He could have anybody. Women were always handing him room keys, phone numbers, business cards. So…how come he didn’t want them?

“You don’t care about me though. “Daniella persisted.

What did she expect? What was he to her but a celebrity stud she’d used to put herself on the map?

He hadn’t asked Daniella to jump into his pool naked and scream she couldn’t swim. She’d probably hired that paparazzi piece of trash to climb his tree and take that shot of her without a stitch on just as Julian had dragged her out of the water.

The next morning their “affair” and the incriminating photograph of him giving Daniella mouth to mouth resuscitation had made every tabloids in the civilized world.

Then she’d come on to him at a party with the line, “Everybody already thinks we’re doing it, so why don’t we?” Before he could but her for being pushy, she’d kissed him.

Second photos of their mouths and bodies glued together. More tabloids.

No use denying his involvement with her after that. The media had given the world a gripping image. Truth didn’t matter. Would his fans believe photos they could salivate over with their own eyes…or what he told them?

TBC


~ Part 7~

A week later Daniella had bribed his gullible maid out of his beach house key, She’d climbed into his bed naked and kissed him, That night he’d almost lived up to his reputation as Hollywood’s number one sex symbol.

So she’d used him. Big damn deal. His fame made him fair game.

“You’re a star. I’m a star. How come you say you’re nothing, “he murmured in her ear.

“I want more, Julian.”

For no reason at all he thought of the drowsy summer afternoon he’d taught a golden-haired Rachel to skim rocks across the creek. His stones had skipped to the other sides; hers had gone plunk. But oh, how they’d laughed together. And, oh, what they’d done later in bed.

She was getting married in a week.

Maybe he wanted more, too.

“I’ve heard that before, “he said to Daniella.

“I mean more…like a diamond ring.”

“Marriage?”

Her silent face was as easy to read as a red neon light blinking YES!

“No way, baby.”

Daniella’s eyes went white-bright as she glared. “Go to hell, Julian.”

“Been there. Done that. For six damn years.”

He didn’t know why the hell he’d said what he’d said on that stage. He’d just been standing there with those lights, sweating like a pig. His knees had buckled. He’d been so damned scared, he’d felt so damned alone. He’d blurted out the first stupid thing that hit him.

Rachel. Again he saw Ben’s bright, broken red car, saw her bend over Ben. When he’d tried to comfort her, she’d pushed him away, crying it was his fault. Then she’d let that cold, blue-blooded bastard, Mark Jackson, fold her into his arms and lead her away.

Damn the ride for carving his heart out, for driving him to these crazy, airless heights to prove he wasn’t just a worthless nobody.

After a pause he said to Daniella. “When I want to get married, I’ll ask.”

The fans’ screams outside the limo roared louder. A young brunette hurled herself at his door and beat the glass with her fists.

“Let me in. I love you, Julian.”

Join the world!

The fan mashed her breasts against the glass and squirmed.

Mac grinned. “Tanya would skin me alive if she saw this…”

Mac was popular with the ladies. Not that he ever did more than look. Tanya was notoriously jealous.

Julian became aware of the shrill cacophony of the crowd yelling for him to get out. Fans of all sizes and ages screamed.

“Stardom, “Mac purred. “Your big dream’s come true.”

Julian laughed shortly.

“Be careful what you wish for?” Mac murmured.

“What my other clients wouldn’t give…”

This craziness was the price Julian paid, for doing work he loved., if they would give him roles with more depth. He was tired of his warrior roles even though all his movies had been a smash hits. He was tired of every woman thinking he was god in bed.

Louie, his bodyguard, opened the door and told them to run. A blonde hurled herself to Mac. Gently, Mac deflected her and flashed his wedding ring toward the cameras. Julian dragged Daniella out of the car through the throng behind him, shielding her from the worst with his muscular body.

Flashbulbs popped, blinding him.

“Faster, “he hissed over his shoulder when she stopped and began to pull her dress down and stick her chest out, simpering and flirting with the cameras.

“Smile for the nice man, Julian, “Daniella ordered.

“Hug her!” A girl screamed.

“Kiss her!”

Encouraged, Daniella’s hand snaked around his neck, her red, gooey mouth covering his. “Kiss me, you undersexed bastard. Make it look good. After all, you’re an actor.”

He fought her. For a second more her lips and arms imprisoned him before he broke free.

Inside it was no better.

Mac’s party was frantic. When Julian stepped through the door, the music stopped. Everybody froze and stared. This award interval was followed by a spontaneous burst of applause stared by a radiant Tanya. Julian nodded to her and then waived the guests to go back to whatever they were doing. For a moment longer he lingered at the entrance, watching Mac’s endless number of guests, mostly starlets coming and going. They crowned around Mac and Tanya, standing at the bar. Mac and Tanya were soon having the time of their lives. Then the band started playing, and rock music hit Julian like a tidal wave. Above the roar, people started yelling.

“Speech! Speech!”

“Thank me, Julian, “a pretty girl teased.

Everybody laughed except Julian, whose grim smile got harder.

“I’ll go home with you, Julian, “another girl whispered. Julian’s gut coiled tighter; his mouth twisted .Would he ever learn to handle this inconvenient side of fame…the constant stares, the never-ending invasion of his privacy?

He walked straight into the room, engaging no one’s eyes especially no female’s.

“Could I get you something, darling? The girl who pounced had glossy black hair. Her laser-bright eyes made too many promises.

“I’m with someone.”

“Not any more, lover.” She pointed at the dance floor. Julian spun around. Daniella was dancing cheek to cheek, body to body with Zachary Charles, his director.

Julian charged toward them. He hated like hell to be rude to Mac and Tanya, but the strange, sick-at-heart mood that had gripped him on that stage had him wild with panic again. The only way he could stay here was to get wasted or stoned. He didn’t do drugs, so he had to get out of this town. Out of this state. Back to Texas where people cut him down to human size. Back to Texas before Rachel got married.

Julian pulled out his cell phone and punched in his pilot’s number. His order were brief.

Julian pocketed his flip-phone. “Let’s go, Danny.”

She snuggled against Zach.

Julian tapped her arm.

When Zach tried to ease her free, she clung to him like a magnet. “Zach and me, we’re having fun.”

“Stay then.” Julian’s dark tone implied he didn’t care what she did. He was a little surprised when she followed him.

Outside, they had to run the gauntlet of his fans again. Much to Louie’s dismay, when the mother of a little girl on crutches thrust a notebook toward Julian, he patiently signed it. Even though the crowd mobbed him, and Louie screamed for him to get in the car. Julian gave the little girl and encouraging word and a hug.

It took then thirty minutes to reach the airport. Howard, his pilot, was climbing aboard the Learjet and settling himself into the cockpit when the limo zoomed up.

Julian joined Howard and guided the jet down the runway until he got clearance to take off into a black, starlit sky. Reluctantly, he handed Howard the controls and went back to Daniella, who snapped her eyes shut and ignored him. He tossed his Oscar into a seat and sprawled at the other end of the jet. He slept all the way to Texas.

With only a few hours left of the night, they walked through the door of his ranch house.

He was opening windows to let in the smell of cedar and the warm night, night air, when the phone rang.

Daniella grabbed it and then slammed it down.

“Who?”

“Some creepy breather.” She sashayed, hips undulating to the bathroom.

Julian checked his Caller ID.

No name.

No need.

He knew Rachel’s number by heart.

Damn. He flushed at the memory of his idiotic, inexplicable confession on stage. What was he going to do now?

TBC

Pm List: Thanks guys, it means a lot to me. These ones are for you!

les400coups
vaughnsgurl4lf
tubby
Stella1
xMountineer02300844x
 
Awsome story :D
I saw her few times but i never start to readind cos i don't like either Sark or Reachel. And i'm helpless S/V shipper...
But it was your story so when i got it achance it turned out really good. Interesting. Hopr they will meet again some time soon.
Could you add me to PM lis?
Thanks in advance

Ally
 
A/N

It's Monday and as promised, here are the new updates. Hope you enjoy and the next update, this Wednesday.

Have a great day.

:smiley:

CJ

A/N

It's Monday nad you know what it means, time for a new update...and again, it's a double update. You guys will, I think be extremely happy with me at the end of the 2nd chapter. I thought it was time our 2 lovebirds reunited.

Hope you had a great weekend. Next update: This Wednesday.

Have a great day.

:smiley:

CJ


~Part 8~

Julian checked his Caller ID.

No name.

No need.

He knew Rachel’s number by heart.

Damn. He flushed at the memory of his idiotic, inexplicable confession on stage. What was he going to do now?

Damn. She was the last person he expected to call.

He’d been out of his mind. Fame made him crazy. Millions of people loved him. Millions of strangers.

He’d flown home to ground himself. The press had printed so many lies about him, he didn’t know who he was anymore. It was as if Julian Sark had ceased to exist. Posters of his tough face and body papered the world. The media made him into a sexual, a macho warrior. But the real man felt even more invisible than he had when he’d been a nobody. When his own life gotten so out of hand? What the hell could he do about it?

Rachel. She’d called.

He felt weird a sensation inside his chest. It was as if his flesh were being flayed, sliced.

Forget her.

An uneasy stillness descended over him. He wanted to hate her, to forget her…but it was easier said than done.

Julian sighed.

Despite his own climb to fame and fortune, despite pretense of style, he was just an actor which meant he was upstart trash in Rachel’s world. Her fiancé was blue-blooded prince from old money. Julian played bad-boy outlaws that thrilled shallow, mass audiences. He didn’t know squat about opera or deep literature. He couldn’t stand tea parties or debutante balls.

The ballroom opened and Daniella, having shred everything except her black stiletto, swayed toward him.

Her blonde hair was wild and unrestrained. She was gorgeous, and it worried him that he wasn’t aroused.

He shucked his clothes and opened a drawer. Yanking out a pair of pajamas, he pulled them on. In a panic he buttoned the shift to the neck only to realize he’d started wrong and was a button off. He leapt into bed and doused the light.

“I’m tired, “he said grumpily. “So, good night.” He rolled over.

She got in beside him. He stiffened when he fell her warmth oozing nearer. Then she curled her luscious body against his back, mashing her breasts against him. He lay still, his muscles strained and taunt. When her fingers groped inside his pajamas , he shoved her away.

“Not tonight, babe.”

“You pathetic bastard!” She jumped up. “What if I go to the tabloids and tell your fans about your…little…problem?”

Violence rose in him. “Go ahead. “His bluff was lethally soft. “That’ll be a refreshing switch form their usual fare.”

He shut his eyes.

When he got up the next morning, she was gone. So were the diamonds he’d borrowed for her to wear.

Julian punched his Caller ID, and Rachel’s number came up again. He went to the fridge. Since he’d hadn’t warned Cass, there was nothing in it but beer and a coffee canister. He shook the canister and found it empty.

He slammed the door and pitched the canister into the trash. The living room with its vaulted ceilings felt empty and huge. He was glad Danny was gone even if the house felt lonelier.

Rachel.

Why did he keep thinking about her? She and her family had made him feel worthless. He had scripts to read, phone calls to make.

Still, he paced restlessly across the room, finally pulling out a little drawer in a table by his sofa. Inside lay a copy of a news magazine. On the cover a handsome dark man carried a little boy on one shoulder along a golden path through a sun-dappled forest. Rachel’s Pulitzer winning picture.

The little boy’s almost paralyzed expression sent a chill through Julian. Rachel was so good. Why had she quit?

He thrust the magazine back into the drawer and walked out onto his porch. As he studied the dark trees along the creek where he and Rachel had played, he saw their child. They’d trusted each other completely. Only she’d known that his father beat him and how his poverty stung him, especially the second hand clothes and old boots that marked him as unworthy. That’s why she’d dressed so badly to put him at ease. When she’d told him she was pregnant their first year of college, he’d asked her to marry him.

His mood grew darker. He got hungrier, too, nut he couldn’t drive into town for coffee, eggs or a burger unless he was ready to answer questions about Rachel.

Fame. He wasn’t handling it.

He rang Cass, who said he’d shop first thing. Julian decided to watch the news while he waited. He ambled over to the fridge, popped the top off a beer, grabbed his remote and collapsed onto his sofa.

There was a story about a shooting spree in an Austin mall parking lot. A jealous husband had plugged his wife’s lover through a grocery sack. The reporter noted that Texas and Mexico were engulfed by a record heat wave, that temperatures had never been so high in April, that violence seemed on the rise as a result.

Julian was about to shut off the TV when the next story featured Senator’s Gibson’s upcoming election and his daughter’s wedding.

Blood rushed in Julian’s head at the sight of Rachel in Mark’s arms. Six years ago, Jackson had put his arms around her just like that right after Ben died. Funny, her turning to Mark, Allison’s old beau, that night. Funny he hadn’t realized that was the exact moment he’d lost her.

Mark Jackson had the same flawless bone structure, the same slicked-back brown hair, the same smooth way, the same frozen eyes. Maybe he looked good to her after he other crazy boyfriends. Julian didn’t like the cynical droop of that carved mouth. He disliked even more the way the older man’s expression hardened every time Rachel said anything offbeat.

Her smiles were strained. Her bright lipstick and rouge made her look paler. She was too thin, too reserved, almost doll-like in her utter lack of passion. She used to be a mess…but an interesting mess. Not that the conventional dress didn’t flow over her slender curves. But her stylish attire and the sever knot at her nape would have suited her mother far better. The Rachel he remembered was unpredictable and loved surprises. She favored loose clothes and ethnic jewelry; she wore her hair long and flowing.

This pose socialite with the tense smile and the incredible cool was a far cry from the girl with the constant grin every time she’d looked at him. The Rachel he’d known had wanted to experience life to its fullest, not to repress herself.

What had killed Rachel’s incandescent warmth and bubbly spontaneity? Why had she given up her career?

There were videos shot of that antebellum mansion near New Orleans. Suddenly an unidentified blond-haired boy came out of the house and ran straight into Mark Jackson’s waiting arms. The little boy flashed a know-it-all grin from behind Mark’s wide shoulder. Wait, the kid couldn’t be a day over five…

Julian shot forward on the couch.

The kid could have passed for his double at the same age. He even had that same birthmark over his left shoulder.

Concidence?

The next footage was of a startled Rachel, who was trying to herd the child back inside away from the cameras.

A growl came out of Julian’s throat. The radiance he had longed to see in her cheeks drained every drop of blood from his face. Flushed with embarrassment, she led the lively child away.

Had she despised him and thought him so worthless she’d lied about their baby.

Julian’s mind spun back to that terrible time when Rachel had fainted at Ben’s funeral and had been rushed to the hospital. It had been hours before Julian had gotten to see her.

Rachel had lain as still as death in that curtained-off bed in that awful hospital recovery room. When Julian had walked in she’d twisted her white face away from him, but not before he’d seen the stark loss in her tear-glazed eyed. Not before he’d felt that scary emptiness inside himself.

She’d told him to go. She’d said, “There is no baby.”

When Julian had staggered out of the house, George Gibson and Mark Jackson had pounced on him. They stuffed him into Mark’s car, driven him out of town and thrown him out in the middle of nowhere. Mark had roughed him up, leaving marks that hadn’t faded in weeks. Semiconscious, he’s stared up at George Gibson, not that he could see him through the haze of blood, But he’d heard him.

“Stay away from my daughter. The last thing she wants is a lowlife like you around. If you ever come back, I’ll make you sorry.”
For six years Julian had been a dead man. He’d tried to fill the void inside himself with fame, money, and sex. Somehow he’d avoided drugs and some of the darker dangers so tempting to lonely creative people in his brutally competitive business. Even though he was a star, he knew what every stars knows, stardom doesn’t last.

What would he have when the ride was over?

He’d loved Rachel. Not for her money. For who she was. All these years, Julian had lived with a hollow vacancy in his heart. When he’d gotten rich and successful, he still hadn’t bothered her…other than that one phone call. Not because of her father but because she’d made it clear she didn’t want to see him.

Julian’s eyes were cold with contempt as he stared at the television set.

There is no baby.

Julian drank his beer silently, taking long swallows as he thought about Nicky.

Whose was he?

Rachel was coming to Texas.

Julian decided he’d ask her.

TBC


~ Part 9~

A few days later:

Julian decided to crash Rachel and Mark’s rehearsal dinner party. He crouched lower in the dense cedar behind the boathouse. Training his binoculars on the brightly Gibson’s mansion, he sucked in a sharp breath when Rachel swirled into his field of vision.

Prim, pale froth hugged her every curves. Her hair was pulled up into an elegant chignon. Diamonds lit her throat. One glimpse of her dynamite figure in that elegant gown, and Julian got as tense and aroused as the lustiest teenager.

How could a bride stand in the mist of that golden window, surrounded by friends and family and look so lost and alone? Where was her groom?

Someone called to her, and she vanished. But that one glimpse triggered a raw ache inside him that wouldn’t quit. The same emptiness was in his own eyes every time he saw himself in the mirror.

His brown hands clenched the binoculars. He felt the sultry air burning his lungs every time he breathed. Her lies had put him in hell. That he felt anything for her, even lust, disgusted him. He was a fool to feel sorry for her. She was having herself a helluva party.

Because of her, he’d spent a lot of lonely years. He’d probably messed up the rest of his life, too. Julian knew it had never occurred to her to invite him. She probably never gave it a thought. She believed her secret was safe, that she was rid of him for good.

Well Julian wasn’t leaving till he found out about the kid. If he didn’t found out tonight, he’d follow her down the aisle and confront her in front of all her snooty friends tomorrow. Not that he wanted to make a fool of himself in public so soon after the Oscar night. But hell, the second time was always easier.

It was 1:00am. He was dead tired. After a week of trying to contact her, he was running out of time. He had to talk to her tonight. Until he did, no way he was jumping onto his motorcycle and roaming though the trees to his ranch house.

So, tonight Julian had dug out the black leather jacket he’d worn in Hellraiser. The jacket fit him like a second skin and had nearly a million silver zippers. Most of which didn’t work. Despite the heat, he’d put on the jacket for protection. Then he’d ridden over by way of overgrown, dirt-bike paths known only by him.

Julian caught more glimpses of Rachel looking sad and lost as she danced with every man except her fiancé.

For a happy couple about to be married, the bride and groom damn sure seemed to be avoiding each other.

Just as Julian had decided to risk edging closer to the mansion on the chance that Rachel might come closer, two tall men in white dinner jackets left the house and strode quickly toward the boathouse.

Bingo. Mark Jackson, the missing bridegroom.

The man with him was an oozier reliquary of Jackson. Younger, thinner, the narrow, unshaven face was framed by pale, limp hair that hung in greasy strings,

“Make it quick.” Mark said.

“What’s a brother for?

“That’s what I’d like to know.”

An awkward moment passed. “Okay, I owe you.”

“Take a nice long trip.” Mark said, giving his brother an envelope.

“Have you even told her about me?”

“She thinks I’m noble to help you.”

“So…is she as hot in the sack as your usual babes?”

Julian’s eyes narrowed. Damn the jerk.

“She’s a senator’s daughter. Her father can open doors.”

“So, you two haven’t done it yet, “Paul sneered.

“I’m sorry we’re having this conversation.”

“I got just the thing to make her forget that macho actor…”Paul’s hand dug into his pocket and retrieve a little plastic bag.

Julian went wild inside when he saw Rachel step onto the terrace with a drink in one hand and a bouquet of flowers in the other.

Oh. God. No.

“Mark.”

“Down here, darling.” Mark glared at Paul. “Scram!”

“Not till I pop this little sucker into her drink.”

“You swore you were clean.” Mark swiped his brother’s hand aside in disgust.

Julian sucked in a tight breath. He’d heard about monsters in bars who put exotic drugs into women’s drinks to make them helpless.

Rachel joined the two men in the boathouse.

“You remember Paul, darling?”

“Your brother, “she gushed.

“Paul’s got a plane to catch. It’s too hot to stay here.”

“But…”

Absently she set her drink on the railing. Quick as a flash Paul’s hand swept across the glass.

Bastard.

When Rachel lifted her drink again and drained the contents, Paul grinned. “You two have fun, big brother. And…thanks.” He said before leaving the two of them alone.

As the band began to play, Mark slipped an around Rachel. “I’m sorry I got so bent out of shape about that damned Julian Whats-His-Name.”

“You know his name…Sark.” She paused.

Mark stiffened.

Within seconds her head fell back against his shoulder as they were dancing.

“Maybe it’s the heat…I feel so weak…” Her voice was faint, strange, breathy. Her bouquet fell to the ground.

Mark lifted her chin and began to kiss her.

Julian scowled. Then he swallowed a deep lungful of pungent night air and almost choked on the murderous breath.

“My lovely, lovely Rachel, “Mark whispered, nibbling her ear. When he deepened his kisses, Rachel clung. Soon, the action was so hot and heavy Julian lowered his face in disgust. The leather jacket made him feel like he was boiling alive.

Damn.

When Julian looked up, her hair had come loose. The bouquet of yellow roses lay crushed beneath Mark’s heel in the dirt. Rachel’s face was trying to twist away from Mark. Instead of letting her go, Mark pushed her up against a column and slid a forceful knee between her legs.

“No…no, “she whispered.

She said no, you bastard.

“Rachel…You’ve made me wait too long. Now everybody’s laughing at me because of that movie star. You’ve got to let me. You’ve got to prove you love me, not him.”

She pushed at Mark. “ No…I feel…hot…sick. Not right.”

She resisted but more weakly. Mark’s ardor grew. When she tried to twist free, she stumbled on a loose flag-stone step.

Then she couldn’t stand, and Mark knelt and lifted her. Dizzily she collapsed, and he gathered her into his arms.

“Let me help you.” Mark’s voice soothed, infinitely tender.

Her head lolled back, her golden hair streaming against his shoulder. Low, tortured sounds escaped her throat as id she were now only semiconscious.

Something was wrong.

Weird black shapes mushroomed size and swirled around Rachel like lurid devils.

The drink.

But she’d only had one, and she’d danced for hours. So how could she feel roaring drunk? She’s never been drunk in her life.

“I want to lie down, “she whispered as Mark headed toward the woods.

A bomb ticked inside Julian in deadly countdown.

“Of course, darling.” Mark’s lip curled as he lay her down on the ground and stated undressing her.

A dark, primal rage rose up in Julian as he sprang from the trees as he made his way toward them and found Mark leaning over her and trying to remove her dress.

“Get off her, you bastard , or I swear I’ll kill you.”

“She’s my girl now, you son-of -a…”

Julian’s gaze burned through her soul.

“Julian. Oh, thank God. It was Julian."

Her eyes filled with tears of gratitude as Mark was yanked off her, and she could breath again. Dazedly she watched as the two men scuffled to the ground.

Julian’s fist rose and crashed into Mark’s jaw, and Mark went down hard, groaning and writhing.

Julian knelt down beside her.

“Rachel. Baby talk to me.”

She tried to speak, but her breath stalled.

“Oh, Julian.” She whispered as he took her in his arms.

”You’re gonna be okay, babe. I’m here now.”


TBC


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