Only Time

Lomeinie

Cadet
Only Time
By
Lomeinie

Rating: K [Suitable for most ages]
Spoilers: Possibly anything up to Season 4's finale of “Before the Flood” though I am ignoring certain things, such as that ending we got and the BIG Vaughn reveal...

Summary: After the birth of her son, Sydney has an epiphany regarding her father

Disclaimers: I don’t own Sydney, Jack, Vaughn or the “Alias” universe as they belong to J.J. Abrams, Bad Robot, and ABC – no copyright infringement is intended by their uses in this story and I expect not to be sued over them.

Author’s Notes: This is set sometime after the end of the series, and to bring everyone up to speed, Sydney is married to Vaughn, both Sydney and Jack have left the CIA.

Special thanks to Elphaba, whose “The Colour of Shadow” inspired me enough to get this fanfiction finished and posted!

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Los Angeles County Hospital

Carrying two very hot cups of Starbucks coffee, Jack Bristow silently entered the neo-natal ICU. As he passed the floor’s nurses he nodded to them, each now familiar but kept walking towards his destination. Jack only paused when the head nurse, Marti, called out quietly to him.

“I’m sorry, Mr. Bristow, but you’ll have to wait outside Benji’s room,” she said in a low voice, “Your daughter and son-in-law are both in there now.”

Jack nodded, looking across the unit towards Benji’s room, “I know,” He held up the coffee cups, “I brought these for them.”

Marti nodded, “I’ll take it to them. Wait here and I’ll let them know you’re here.”

“Thank you,” Jack said, placing the coffee in her hands, “Tell me, have they been sitting with Benji all night?”

Marti nodded, “Yeah, they have. I’ll take these in and let them know you’re here.” The nurse then left Jack there walking quickly to Room 472. Jack watched as Vaughn stood up to take the coffee from her, and as he gestured for her to ne quiet, motioning towards Sydney.

///
“Mr. Bristow is here,” Marti whispered as he took the coffee.

“I’ll go talk to him,” Vaughn replied, setting down Sydney’s cup before taking a drink from his own, feeling more awake when the caffeine started kicking in. The night had been a long one, and he was glad Sydney had fallen asleep before she made herself sick with worry over their son.

Marti moved towards the incubator where Benji was hooked up to a plethora of monitors and tubes. The poor little guy had been diagnosed with a serious heart condition, one the doctors did not catch until moments after his birth, which was only one short week ago.

As the nurse moved towards the baby and Vaughn started towards the door, Sydney opened her eyes to say quietly, “I’ll go.”

Vaughn looked at his wife, “I thought you were asleep.”

Sydney shrugged before stretching, “I was only dozing. I heard Marti say my Dad is here.”

Marti nodded, pointing with her pen, “He’s over by the nurses station.”

When Sydney moved to get out of her chair, Vaughn halted her, “I”ll go talk to Jack, Syd. You stay here and rest.”

Sydney stood up despite his protest, “It’s all right, I need to stretch anyway, and I want to talk to Dad. I have something I want...that I need to say to him.”

Vaughn nodded, and moved to stand before her, kissing her, “All right if you’re sure.”

“I’m sure,” she replied, and finally she noticed the other coffee that had been brought for her. Picking it up, she began walking towards the door, sipping carefully on the still scalding hot liquid as she left her son’s room.

///
Jack watched everything transpiring in his grandson’s room, and felt a twinge of disappointment when he saw that it was Vaughn who was coming out to talk to him instead of Sydney. He realized Sydney must have fallen asleep and it was true that why he come to like Michael Vaughn on more than one level, he still felt as though he tolerated more than anything else. Still he had kept his word to love and make Sydney happy, so Jack supposed he wasn’t all that bad.

To Jack’s surprise, Vaughn turned back at the door, and was clearly talking to someone besides Marti in the room. A second later, Sydney rose from her chair, stretching, and a moment after that she exited Benji’s room, sipping on the hot coffee. She smiled when she saw, as tired as she was, and taking care of the coffee in her hand, they hugged.

Sydney stayed in his arms longer than he had expected, and when she finally pulled away, Jack looked on her with concern, “Sweetheart, are you all right?”

Sydney nodded, “I’m just really tired.”

“What have the doctors told you about the baby?” Jack asked.

“They’re telling us the same thing,” she replied, “They say he’s not any worse but he’s not really any better.”

As he spoke, Jack noted not for the first time that Sydney’s eyes were red, and pouches of exhaustion had begun to form under her eyes. Gently, Jack touched her cheek saying, “Sweetheart, why don’t you and Michael go home, eat, and rest for a few hours. I’ll sit with Benji awhile.”

Sydney smiled, “Thank you.” Jack started towards Benji’s room, and she halted him, “Dad, wait.”

Jack turned to her, “Yes?”

Sydney hesistated, struggling with her words, “Dad, there’s something I need to say to you.” She looked around at their surroundings, “But not here.”

He took her hand, “Let’s try the waiting room.” Sydney nodded in agreement, and together they walked to the empty waiting room. He waited until she was settled in the chair beside him before he asked, “What is it, Sydney?”

Sydney had put down what remained of the coffee, giving her father her full attention, “I’m not sure where to begin or how to say this but just hear me out, okay?”

Jack nodded, “All right.”

Sydney’s eyes were already red from the sleeplesness she had been experiencing from several nights in a row but they were also puffy from all the tears she had been sheding as she was now. As the words began to flow so did her tears, “When Benji was born, I discovered that what I thought was unconditional love for the people in my life wasn’t what I thought it was. Even before my son was born, even before I felt him moving inside of me for the first time, I felt a love so fierce I knew I would do anything, anything I have to keep him safe.” She paused to grab a tissue from the coffee table between them, wiping her eyes.

“There is nothing or no love in the world that compares to the love between a parent and their child,” she said after a moment, “And I wanted to say to you is I now finally, fully understand why you’ve done the things you have to protect me all of these years. I even understand the ones that were morally questionable at best. I know because if I were given a choice like that now, I would take it without hesistation if it meant Benji could be spared from anything bad happening to him.”

She paused again before continuing, “I’m sorry, Dad, for all the times I assumed the worst about you when you were only trying to protect me the best you knew how.”

Even after all the years since their estrangement had ended, Jack still felt the guilt of what he had been forced to do to protect his daughter. He still felt unworthy to have her as his daughter, and he began to tell her so.

Sydney hushed him by actually placing her one of her fingers over his lips.

“Daddy,” she began, pausing and both smiled, realizing it had been a long time since she had called him that, “I know we’ve both done and said somethings to each other in the past that were hurtful. Yes there were times you hurt me but I know there were times I hurt you too. I know I can be awful, and there were times I said things because I knew they would hurt you, and I’m sorry.”

She sniffled, “If anything, I’d say you’re the best father I could ever hoped to have had.” Again she silenced Jack when it seemed he would contest her words, “No, Dad, you are the best father I could have ever hoped for because you’ve always been willing to risk anything, including your soul and your life to keep me safe. Why you almost died of radiation poisoning because you saved my life.” She paused, “Thank you, Dad. I love you and I can only pray I am half the parent you are to Benji in the coming years.”

Jack didn’t try to say anything because he knew she wouldn’t let him, so with tears in his eyes he simply pulled Sydney into his arms, and for a little while Sydney sat with her head laying on her daddy’s shoulder. Jack just stroked her hair, and soon when he knew Sydney had fallen asleep in his arms he whispered simply, “Thank you.”


FIN
bjv1.jpg

Benjamin "Benji" Jonathan Vaughn

///
Author’s Note #2: I know rumor has it, Sydney will be pregnant in Season 5 of Alias (due to JG’s real life pregnancy) and to be honest I have mixed feelings. I am not sure I want to see Syd pregnant but at the same time I kind of do because I think whenever she becomes a mother, she will gain a better understanding of Jack and how her father has done anything he has to in order to keep her safe.

Also, I admit the idea of Jack Bristow becoming a grandfather has great potential for some scenes that’ll make us all go “Awwwww!” and to tear up - not to mention I am anxious to see what Victor Garber would do with such scenes.

I mean there’s no one in the world who can get through Jack’s emotional armor like Sydney, so just imagine what, a tiny baby, his grandchild will be able to do! *g*
 
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