Title: talk
Author: Jenn
Rating: PG?
Summary: entry for the September challenge at Cover Me~ dialogue only
*don't know if i want to continue it again so let me know what you think~*
“What do you want?”
“Why are you playing these games with me? You know what I want. You’ve known it ever since I came in through that door.”
“And if I do? What then? What difference does it make anyway? You left. You’re gone. You didn’t care what I knew then, what I believed then. So why does it all of the sudden matter now?”
“Because this time, I know too.”
“What are you trying to get at, Sydney? I wanted to be with you. I wanted to be here with you for the rest of my life and more… and you just left. Do you really think that you can waltz back here five years later as if nothing’s changed? As if nothing happened at all in the first place? As if we could just go on where we left off?”
“I-“
“No. You can’t. The world does not revolve around you. I used to think it did. I used to watch you struggle through every obstacle that came your way and think to myself, ‘God, she is the strongest person I have ever known.’ And I thought that I could give up anything to preserve that strength in you. Maybe if you had come back the next day- the next month even…”
“Vaughn-“
“-NO. You have to listen to me. You left without a number, without an address, a note, an alias, a destination, a plan, or even a reason. You walked out of the house on a sunny day after a perfect morning and a breakfast of scrambled eggs, bacon, toast, and orange juice. The air outside was still misty from the rain the night before. The scent of your hair was still on the pillow. You were still wearing my gorram shirt. And now you’re back. And I don’t know what you want from me.”
“Vaughn… please-“
“-No Syd, ‘please’ doesn’t work anymore. I’ve moved on from ‘please’.”
“What hardened your heart?”
“… Do you even have to ask, Sydney? You. You did. I loved you. You told me that you loved me. We had our whole lives planned out. And then one day you’re gone. And it’s like you were never here.”
“I was.”
“Then you should have stayed.”
“… You’ve found someone else haven’t you?”
“Don’t even try to tell me that you haven’t.”
“I didn’t.”
“You’re lying. Even if you didn’t, you did because you left. That’s the same thing.”
“It’s not.”
“Syd—just, just leave. You hurt me too much. I can’t try it again.”
“Weren’t you the one who told me that anything was worth the risk? That you would do anything for love?”
“Yes. And I did. And look what happened.”
“’It is better to have loved and lost then to never have loved at all.’”
“You have… no right to be saying those words. You have absolutely no claim on my heart anymore, Sydney Bristow. Does my heart still speed up when I see your face? Of course it does. Do I feel as if more than anything I want to hold you in my arms and pretend that nothing happened? Yes I do. Does a part of me hate myself for saying the words coming out of my mouth? That’s a given. But it’s not that easy anymore. Because more than all of that, more than the love I still feel when I see your face- I see your betrayal.”
“I’m back.”
“No you’re not. Whatever made you leave then will make you leave now.”
“Try again.”
“No.”
“You never lost my love, Michael!”
“Don’t cry, Syd. Don’t stand there and cry- you don’t know half of what I felt. All those hours of analyzing what I did wrong, what I could have said, what I could have prevented—to find that it didn’t matter. That nothing mattered. That it wasn’t what I was or did. It was what I wasn’t. It was what I didn’t too.”
“It hurt me too.”
“But you didn’t come back.”
“I wanted to.”
“You of all people should know that wanting is very different from acting. That’s something we both know.”
“Don’t forget the words, Michael.”
“Stop it. Whoever said that it was better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all never really experienced heartbreak.”
“Of course he did. If he hadn’t, his words wouldn’t be so famous.”
“Well then he was never loved by you. If he was, he never would have allowed that phrase to come into this world.”
“Michael… I still love you.”
“That doesn’t matter any more. I love you. But I don’t trust you. Please leave.”
the end?
more?
let me know~
-jenn
Author: Jenn
Rating: PG?
Summary: entry for the September challenge at Cover Me~ dialogue only
*don't know if i want to continue it again so let me know what you think~*
“What do you want?”
“Why are you playing these games with me? You know what I want. You’ve known it ever since I came in through that door.”
“And if I do? What then? What difference does it make anyway? You left. You’re gone. You didn’t care what I knew then, what I believed then. So why does it all of the sudden matter now?”
“Because this time, I know too.”
“What are you trying to get at, Sydney? I wanted to be with you. I wanted to be here with you for the rest of my life and more… and you just left. Do you really think that you can waltz back here five years later as if nothing’s changed? As if nothing happened at all in the first place? As if we could just go on where we left off?”
“I-“
“No. You can’t. The world does not revolve around you. I used to think it did. I used to watch you struggle through every obstacle that came your way and think to myself, ‘God, she is the strongest person I have ever known.’ And I thought that I could give up anything to preserve that strength in you. Maybe if you had come back the next day- the next month even…”
“Vaughn-“
“-NO. You have to listen to me. You left without a number, without an address, a note, an alias, a destination, a plan, or even a reason. You walked out of the house on a sunny day after a perfect morning and a breakfast of scrambled eggs, bacon, toast, and orange juice. The air outside was still misty from the rain the night before. The scent of your hair was still on the pillow. You were still wearing my gorram shirt. And now you’re back. And I don’t know what you want from me.”
“Vaughn… please-“
“-No Syd, ‘please’ doesn’t work anymore. I’ve moved on from ‘please’.”
“What hardened your heart?”
“… Do you even have to ask, Sydney? You. You did. I loved you. You told me that you loved me. We had our whole lives planned out. And then one day you’re gone. And it’s like you were never here.”
“I was.”
“Then you should have stayed.”
“… You’ve found someone else haven’t you?”
“Don’t even try to tell me that you haven’t.”
“I didn’t.”
“You’re lying. Even if you didn’t, you did because you left. That’s the same thing.”
“It’s not.”
“Syd—just, just leave. You hurt me too much. I can’t try it again.”
“Weren’t you the one who told me that anything was worth the risk? That you would do anything for love?”
“Yes. And I did. And look what happened.”
“’It is better to have loved and lost then to never have loved at all.’”
“You have… no right to be saying those words. You have absolutely no claim on my heart anymore, Sydney Bristow. Does my heart still speed up when I see your face? Of course it does. Do I feel as if more than anything I want to hold you in my arms and pretend that nothing happened? Yes I do. Does a part of me hate myself for saying the words coming out of my mouth? That’s a given. But it’s not that easy anymore. Because more than all of that, more than the love I still feel when I see your face- I see your betrayal.”
“I’m back.”
“No you’re not. Whatever made you leave then will make you leave now.”
“Try again.”
“No.”
“You never lost my love, Michael!”
“Don’t cry, Syd. Don’t stand there and cry- you don’t know half of what I felt. All those hours of analyzing what I did wrong, what I could have said, what I could have prevented—to find that it didn’t matter. That nothing mattered. That it wasn’t what I was or did. It was what I wasn’t. It was what I didn’t too.”
“It hurt me too.”
“But you didn’t come back.”
“I wanted to.”
“You of all people should know that wanting is very different from acting. That’s something we both know.”
“Don’t forget the words, Michael.”
“Stop it. Whoever said that it was better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all never really experienced heartbreak.”
“Of course he did. If he hadn’t, his words wouldn’t be so famous.”
“Well then he was never loved by you. If he was, he never would have allowed that phrase to come into this world.”
“Michael… I still love you.”
“That doesn’t matter any more. I love you. But I don’t trust you. Please leave.”
the end?
more?
let me know~
-jenn
And yes I say keep going! Keep going! Keep going!