Why

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luckylass

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<span style='font-size:14pt;line-height:100%'>Hello there! Ok, I've been thinking about a story like this for awhile, and in this moment of delirium, I decided to write something...</span>

Title: Why
Summary: Sydney finds a secret that has been long kept in the dark
Disclaimer: None of the Alias characters are my own...*although I have tried to find a Vaughn :P *

CHAPTER 1

She never thought she would be in this position. She's been missing for two years, missing her heart and friends along the way. Vaughn was married, and she wasn't the lucky bride. But none of that has brought pain to her heart- sorrow but not pain.

"Syd!" s*** Vaughn's talking to her again
She had been zoning out a lot lately. Then again, time goes amazing slow when your heart is shattered, when your mind is still reeling from 2 month old information. She's been missing for two years, her friends are gone, and she is yet again under the scrutiny of a terrorist organization.

"Yeah?"

"Are you alright?" why does he do this?

"Fantastic" ok, he really doesn't buy that; he's c***ed his head to the side- oooh watch out now.

"Syd don't-"

"Hey people!" Thank god for Weiss. 'note to self, buy him a pizza later.

ha! vaughn's giving him that 'seriously?! your timing is that bad look' god I love it

"Did you know there's a debriefing in like, 5 minutes?" weiss says as he checks his watch

"Actually, I was about to tell her." uh-oh Vaughn's mad

"Come on Syd, let's go." Oh! Point for Weiss! He totally ignored Vaughn. I wish I could do it so well.

ok, so that was short, and kinda lame, but I promise it will get better! let me know if you want a pm!

:clover: lucky
 
Ooh, ooh! Me me me!

*hops*

Can I pwease get a pee emmy when you update? :angelic:

I love the first chapter... Especially the way you write Syd's thoughts after everything that's said, it's kinda cute ;)

Update soon!

Cai
x
 
well first off, thank you all for reading this fic! it means so much to me...and secondly, enjoy!!

Chapter 2

In this episode of Sydney has a headache: Dixon has sent me and Vaughn to infiltrate a warehouse on the outskirts of Auckland, because apparently the CIA has discovered yet another hidden artifact being kept by Freaks Inc.

Can this get any more perfect? Oh wait, silly me, of course it can! You see, Vaughn has been staring at me for about 45 minutes now. I suppose pretending to be asleep isn't all that effective is it? Oh well, I shouldn't become too bitter. I might turn ugly, cold, and b****y. One Lauren in the world is enough. heh. I made a funny.

"We are now descending into Auckland airspace, please fasten your seatbelts, thank you."

"Syd, baby wake up" Vaughn says while stroking my face.
Why does he do this? Why call me baby? Why remind me of better times? For the sake of completing this mini-mission, I wake up hopefully convincingly enough so he doesn't have to break out the wrinkles.

1 hour later.....
We met a small team of 5 after leaving the airport, and are now in position to enter.

"Once you get past the main stairwell, and team 1 reaches the north-west corridor, wait for Smith's signal to go further."
Vaughn effectively removed Smith from being my partner after finding him blatantly checking me out. Oh what the man does for me. Yes, it's true, I'm smiling.tee-hee.

*ahem* back to serious spy-stuff

We enter the warehouse, and as stationary as this is, it reminds me of another warehouse. Our warehouse.

God, I need to snap out of it. Not just the memories, but this catatonic state of mourning that I've been in for 2 months.

You know the saying surprises are around the corner? Well, the manifestation of this was unfolding right before my eyes.

"Sydney get down!" Vaughn orders as gunfire erupts before us. Shielding me with his body, as usual trying to protect me no matter what his situation is. Through the blasting I hear a voice that has been present only in my memories.

"Sydney!" I know that voice, I'd know it anywhere.

*FLASHBACK*

'I'm sure I got a D'

'You did not get a D'

'I think I got a D, I think I got like a 64 maybe'

'Syd you've never gotten a D'

'I've gotten a D'

'When have you gotten--'

'High school. Home Ec. Remember the?'

'Yeah, what did you do? Oh, embroider something on a t-shirt'

'Sweatshirt. That was the assignment.'

'The word was obscene, right? About the teacher?'

'That guy was a sexist pig. I deserved a scholarship for that.'

'Wait, hold on a sec.'

'This time I deserve a D. I didn't prepare. I didn't ha-have enough time.'

'We've had this conversation. Quit the bank if the part-time thing isn't working.'

'What are you doing?'

'I can't go through double-shift again holding on to this.'

'Did you get the Dave Matthews tickets?'

'Will you stand up please? I wanted to wait. Maybe do it at the weekend, but I couldn't.'

'What's going on?'

'Remember our first date? The bowling alley? The loud guy?'

'Oh, god..'

[shout-singing]
Build me up
buttercup, baby
Then you bring me down
And mess me around, and then,
worst of all
You never call, baby,
When you say you will
But I love you still,
I need you
More than anyone, darling
-bells start tolling-
I know that I'm yours from the start
Build me up, buttercup
Don't break my heart

Shut-Up!

'Sydney...I can't tell you how much I hope you'll marry me. D-Despite what I just did.'

'Yes. Yes of course. I love you'*FLASHBACK ENDS*

Danny.



:clover: lucky
 
Juz a lil side note...

I actually chose Auckland because I just got back from a trip to Australia and New Zealand... I swear I'm gonna move there, but I did miss the south, so it's kinda nice being home.lol.
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thank you all so much
 
woo hoo! 1st! :D I'm proud.

Great story, I've been enjoying Sydney's thoughts. Funny. I loved the Lauren comment. It's so true! :lol: Thanks for the PM. :smiley: Update soon!
 
Wow!
This is good.
I like it being told from Syd's P.O.V. And the way you tell it is funny. :lol:
Can I get a pm when you update? :Please:
Update soon
 
I don't quite get it...

:confused:

What the heckles is Danny doing there?

Anyway! Just some constructive criticism that I have to offer you... Don't take any offence when I say this, mkay? Cos by absolutely no means do I intend to make you feel bad :hug:

I just think that maybe more description could be put into it, because that's the only thing that this fic is lacking. I mean, I love the speech, and I love the thoughts of Sydney's that are added after each person speaks... But it just makes it a little harder to understand without any detail or description in the fic, know what I mean?

Anyway, other than that... I love this fic! :woot: Especially the thoughts of Sydney's that you've added, because they really make Syd sound more real and down-to-earth, and also not so robot-like that she is sometimes on the show! :lol:

Anyways, please don't take any offence to anything I've said! :thinking:

Update soon, love the chapter!

Cai
x
 
Ok, this is just a bridge chapter, something that I just needed to write...it's told from syd's p.o.v. and she's unconscious- don't worry nothing's wrong.lol.

Credit goes to LeAnn Rimes for the song I'm using.


Chapter 3

Got a date a week from Friday with a preacher's son
Everybody says he's crazy
I'll have to see

I finally moved to Jackson when the summer came
I won't have to pay that boy to rake my leaves


I thought I could just move on with my life. I thought that Vaughn could go back to life with his wife, and that I could find peace in the midst of this storm and keep my life in motion.

I was dead wrong; no pun intended.

I'm probably going on and on
It seems I'm doing more of that these days

I probably wouldn't be this way
I probably wouldn't hurt so bad
I never pictured every minute without you in it
Oh you left so fast

Sometimes I see you standing there
Sometimes it's like I'm losing touch
Sometimes I feel like I'm so lucky to have had the chance to love this much

My life is chaios. That's it. I feel myself slipping with each mission, with each debrief, with each moment I spend alone at home. I miss him so much. I don't know where this reservoir of strength that I've used came from, but I think it's running dry.

I never imagined my life turning into this hurricane mess. The CIA isn't even the issue. The issue is that at 31 years old, I feel the need to become my six year old self and run to someone to comfort me. But no one's here.

Life does move fast, and for that I feel deprived.

God gave me a moment's grace
'Cause if I'd never seen your face
I probably wouldn't be this way

It's never easy to move on from what you love, but Vaughn is just impossible to see past. Maybe it's just him, just the way he is-because I've been in this situation before and it's never been like this. If it wasn't Vaughn that I had to move past, I think I would be a lot better off.

Mama says that I just shouldn't speak to you
Susan says that I should just move on

You oughta see the way these people look at me
When they see me 'round here talking to this stone

Everybody thinks I've lost my mind
But I just take it day by day

Weiss has helped me though. There's the silver lining of this storm cloud. He's tried to get me back to my life. But I don't have life without him. He is my life, and yes I have turned into the clingy shell of a woman that I despised. But notice that despise is in the past tense. I have since learned what keeps them attached at their signifigant other's hip. It's the love that only comes from that heart. The heart that they say beats for only you. But in retrospect, I suppose words are as flaky as believed.

I swear you don't even see it though. You see Lauren, obviously, but you have completely missed me. I know so much more about you too. I know the way you like your coffee, which playlist you're listening to on your IPod depending on the day you've had. Which articles of magazines and newspapers you're most likely to read. I know exactly what it takes to make you push over the edge during our love making. I know you.

And though you don't see me, I know everyone else around us does. Lauren shoots me death glares, everyone else pours out pity; the damned thing is that I don't know what's worse.

But what can I do? Turn back time? No. Marshall hasn't gotten that far. Yet.

I probably wouldn't be this way
I probably wouldn't hurt so bad
I never pictured every minute without you in it
Oh you left so fast
Sometimes I see you standing there
Sometimes I feel an angel's touch
Sometimes I feel like I'm so lucky to have had the chance to love this much
God give me a moment's grace
'Cause if I'd never seen your face
I probably wouldn't be this way

You'll never know how much I miss you. I know what you meant now when I confronted you in your classroom and you said you still felt like I was there. Brushing my hair, or taking a shower, or cooking dinner I feel your phantom touch. I can feel your fingers in my hair, or on my skin, or on my stomach with your lips on my neck distracting me from whatever task is at hand. But when I turn around, I'm greeted with the slap in the face that is reality. This often brings a fresh batch of tears, which leads to pizza and beer which leads to Weiss. But at least I can count on something right? Yeah. Because I'm so optomistic.

Probably wouldn't be this way

Got a date a week from Fridaay with a preacher's son
Everybody say's I'm crazy
Guess I'll have to see.

I can't believe Danny's here, or was here before I fainted. Oh god, what if he's my newest enemy? I'll wait and see. Who knows, maybe I'll get to finish what we started

*LeAnn Rimes- Probably Wouldn't Be This Way



lucky -_-
 
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:clover: lucky
 
Lucky, the first two chapters were really funny, but this last one... SO good! I don't listen to country that much, but the lyrics to that song were really good with the story. I love the way country songs tell stories. can I get a pm?

LuLu
 
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