Sorry for the delay, I'm posting chapter four tonight and the next one soon ^_^ . I have 37 chapters typed and I will try to get more during this week before going back to school. Btw, is there someone who can beta a few chapters for me? My beta is kind of really busy at the moment
Thanks
Chapter Three
That visit of Paris was the first one of many, Vaughn showed me all the best places of Paris. It's how our relation started and how I fall in love with him, he is the first man I have ever loved in my life. Sydney was pulled out of her thoughts by her son who was running toward her. She took him in her arms as he started to talk.
"Mom when are we going to New Yok?" he asked.
"In a few days, and it's New York. I will take you to visit the big lady with the torch in her hand. Do you remember her?"
"You showed me the picture, why does she have a torch in her hand?"
"Because she symbolizes freedom, but you are too young for that. And if you are really nice, I will take you to the zoo."
"Really?" he asked excited by the thought of visiting a zoo, he got his love for animals from his father, she thought with a sad smile.
"Yes, but you will have to be good with your nanny while mommy is working, do you understand me Mister Bristow?" she answered as she tickled him, kissing him on the forehead. "So do you promise to behave while mommy is working?"
"Yes! And you, do you promise to offer me a lot of candies and take to see the fat lady?"
"I promise, now it's time to go home. Mommy still has work to do unlike you. Are you ready to go?"
"Yes."
"You are really a good boy, do you know that? I'm really proud of you."
"I'm proud of you too."
Sydney laughed at what her son just told her, even if he didn't really understand what he just said she did and she was happy. It was on the most wonderful thing someone told her, and her son being the one who told her that made it more special. Not knowing what to say she just took in her arms, hugging him.
"Mom, I can't breath!!!" he cried as he was trying to freed him from her hug.
"Sorry, it's just I love you very much and I wanted to show it to you. Is there something wrong with that?"
"No but I can't breath when you do that!" he said before running toward his friends to tell them goodbye and to take back all his toys. Sydney was looking at him with a smile, waiting for him to come back, she couldn't help but smile at her son. She loved seeing him play with other children, it makes her want to have more. But she knows she can't have more children because the only man she wants to have children with is not a man for her. She let him go and there isn't a chance for him to come back toward her now, not after what she did and told him. She was really horrible, but she knew she had to hurt him, it was the only way to let him let her go. But every word she told him hurt her even more than it hurt him. Because not only she was lying to him to protect her secret, but she was also keeping him for experiencing wonderful things. She must have hurt him more than he let her see, even if cried she was sure he had done more, he must have torn apart all the pictures he had of them together. And it's not like she could blame because when you hear from your fiancé that she has fallen out of love and she is leaving you to live with another man it makes you want to kill the other guy. But in her case there was no other guy, just a baby he didn't know about. Every time she thinks to what she has done to Vaughn she cries, because nothing will ever take away that guilt feeling and her regrets. She shouldn't have threatened him like she did.
But it's now to late to regret her decisions, you have to live with them.
There is no going back, as hard as it's, she has to let it go and start to forget the only man she has ever loved. Because he is no longer her, he hasn't been in years. By now he must have forgotten her and if it's not the case must hate her.