Broken

Hey guys... okay, i know i have 2 other fics that i need to finish up, but i couldn't resist, this idea just came to me.
it's my very first fic based on the events of The Telling but like my usual style, it's totally AU.
So hope you guys like it... and if you don't please spare my feelings!
Read on....




CHAPTER ONE
(October 1st, 2008)

Greg Watson, a stocky young blonde agent, fresh from The Farm, felt like his tie was tightening around his neck, making breathing seem like an almost foreign concept.

Standing in front of him was one of the Agency’s most decorated agents.
Not only did he have a stellar list of accomplishments and successes to his name, he also ranked as one of the most well-respected and highly feared agents of CIA.

Watson resisted the urge to clear his suddenly dry and scratchy throat as Michael Vaughn entered the conference room, his eyes betraying no emotion whatsoever as his eyes quickly passed over one person and then to the next.

As he moved his head swept slightly from side to side, a faint scar running from the side of his head down to cheekbone could be made out.

“These the new recruits?” Vaughn barked to Eric Weiss who had been in charge of orientation for their group.
Weiss nodded, the only person in the room who seemed unfazed despite the calculated tone and perma-scowl on the senior agent’s face, very much unlike the 6 other male rookie agents who were practically quaking in their leather shoes.

“Guys, meet Senior Agent Michael Vaughn, one of the CIA’s finest, although I’m sure many of you here already know that,” Weiss said making a quick introduction.
Not that one was needed.

Everyone knew who Michael Vaughn was.

He was about six-feet-tall, but standing in front of them, he could have easily passed for eight… or eighty. “Welcome to the CIA, and to what will become your own personal hell hole for the next 25 years… if you’re lucky enough to live that long.”

His green eyes bore holes into each of their heads. His words were met with silence and none movement, and he could tell it was because they were scared to death.

Weiss felt a glimmer of sympathy for the young men in the room. Unlike them, he hadn’t encountered a superior like Vaughn to make him feel more at home… or not.

But Weiss in no way felt like Vaughn needed to be told to back off or to cut them, or anyone some slack. No, today was October 1st, and if Vaughn wanted to play frat jokes on these rookies, he’d be right there acting as his best friend’s right hand.

“This is the real world ladies, we aren’t doing drills or target shooting. It’s about smarts and survival. Let your guard down and you die, or worse…” his voice cracked ever so slightly that only Weiss was able to detect it.

“Or worse someone else could die on your watch.” Anyone here not prepared to go in with everything and come out with nothing, step up now and get a swift kick in the ass home.”

Without a backward glance he strode out of the room… and a faint ripple of relief could be heard among the rookies.
Weiss narrowed his eyes slightly at their reaction, feeling a surge of protectiveness for his friend.

His voice was harsher than he intended when spoke up to reprimand them. “You’d be wise to listen to Agent Vaughn, gentlemen. Few men in the agency have gone through as much as he has, and survived.”

****

(October 1st, 2003)

When most couples celebrated an important event or occasion, they usually dressed up and went to a fancy place to have dinner or spend an evening.

But for Michael Vaughn, CIA senior agent and head strategist and his girlfriend Sydney Bristow, former CIA double agent and present high junior high teacher, celebrations meant dressing down, ordering pizza from their favorite delivery place and spending a quiet night indoors.

After several months of being together, they had had quite a few of those quiet, celebratory evenings. Which also meant that quite a number of pizzas had been shared.
Why they never ordered anything else was a thought that never crossed their minds, not that it mattered.

The first time Vaughn had picked up the phone to order they discovered something about each other… she hated olives and but he never ate pizza without them.
They were both looking forward to eating a pizza that night, so they compromised. And that night, they developed a routine that would stick around for a long time to come.

Vaughn would carefully pry off all the olives from a slice of pizza while she in turn would artfully pile them onto another.
And then they’d switch.
It usually meant that their pizza eating would often stretch out to be much longer than most, but neither would ever dream of eating pizza anyway else ever again.

The pizza they shared on October 1, 2003 proved to be no different. “Do you think it’s weird how we celebrate the day we met as our anniversary rather than the day we actually got together, like most people do?” Sydney asked thoughtfully as Vaughn started his work on her pizza slice.

He glanced up briefly and smiled at her, his green eyes twinkling with amusement. “Syd, we aren’t most people,” he reminded her lightly.

She smiled sheepishly as she loaded up his slice of pizza with her discarded olives. “You’re right of course. And I like to think that October 1st is more than just the day we met, it’s the day when my life changed completely, of course, I didn’t know it at the time,” she said with a chuckle.

They switched slices and began to eat. “I did, the second I saw you with pink hair, a swollen jaw and running mascara, I knew you were going to be something important to me, and that things would never be the same again.”

Sydney took a bite of her pizza and smiled at him, dimples deepening. “I’m glad you were right.”

After a few moments of silence, she spoke up again. “October 1st, 2001 was pretty special, but I don’t think I ever told you that 2002 was a milestone too.”

Vaughn’s forehead furrowed slightly as he wondered why. “That was the same week I was missing in Taipei,” he realized.

Sydney nodded. “I never told you this, but on that day, I walked into the warehouse, hoping so bad that you’d be there. But you weren’t, it was Weiss. At that moment I feared the worst. I thought he was going to tell me that you weren’t coming back… ever, and all I could think was that I may have lost you before I even had a chance to have you.”

Vaughn held her close and told something for the first time. "I love you Sydney." He heard the smile in her voice even if he couldn't see it. "I love you too Michael."
 
CHAPTER TWO
(November 27, 2008)

Craig Parker looked up from animated, but one-sided conversation he was having with Marshall Flinkman when Vaughn walked into the Ops center, not stopping to greet, smile or even acknowledge anyone else.

As had become his habit, he went straight to his own private office, situated himself at his desk and buried himself immersed himself in work. “Mr. Parker? Mr. Parker, sir?” Marshall asked tentatively.

Craig snapped out of his contemplative state and gave Marshall a brief, but apologetic smile. “Sorry Marshall,” he said.
The eccentric tech guy nodded his understanding as he followed Craig’s gaze back to Vaughn’s office.

And a look of realization and crossed his face as he did. “November 27,” he said quietly.
Craig pressed his lips together in a grim smile and nodded. “His birthday.”

They were both silent as they watched Vaughn immerse himself in the stack of folders and papers on his desk, never once looking up, even if he was acutely aware of being watched through the windows of his office.

“Maybe we should go over there and knock?” Marshall asked, nervously. “I mean, Mr. Vaughn made it clear a long time ago that he didn’t care, but it is his birthday, maybe this year he’d like a greeting or even just a cup of coffee, because you know, when Ms. Bristow was around-“ he stopped short.

They both knew what Vaughn had been like when Sydney was still around. How his face would light up whenever she walked into the room.
And they both had a clear memory of Vaughn’s face when he walked into the JTF a few days after his birthday 4 years, ago. The last one he had shared with Sydney.
What was once a great day for him only served as another painful reminder of what he had lost.

Craig shook his head. “No Marshall, let’s just leave him alone again this year. He’ll be back to normal tomorrow,” he answered.

Only they both knew that deep down their friend would never be the same again. He hadn’t been for 4 long years.


****

(November 27, 2003)

Santa Barbara had always held a special place in both their hearts.

Aside from being their first vacation spot, it was also where they celebrated their one month anniversary after they had first gotten together.

Sydney smiled to herself as she felt Vaughn's arm tighten around her, feeling completely content and at peace. “Can we just stay here for the rest of our lives? Screw the real world,” she said lightly.

The sound of his low laugh rumbled throughout his body, making her feel even more secure in his embrace.
They were sitting on the carpeted floor of their rented cottage, both watching the flames flicker in the fireplace a few feet in front of them, Vaughn leaning against the couch, and Sydney sitting in-between his legs and leaning her back against his chest, her head propped up between the crook of his neck and shoulder.

“Syd… thank you for today,” he murmured, kissing the side of her head. Sydney smiled and turned to look at him. “You’re welcome,” she answered leaning up for a real kiss. “Happy birthday,” she added. He gave her a lazy grin. “Yeah, it really was,” he agreed.

It was around lunchtime that day when Vaughn had steadily refused Weiss’ insistence on dragging his ass out of the JTF for a birthday drink at the CIA sanctioned bar that they always frequented.
Weiss got hammered on a frequent basis, but even he never mixed alcohol in with work. So when Will Tippin began to back up Weiss’ suggestion, he had a hunch that something was up.

He was right.

“Surprise!” Sydney stood in the center of the room, surrounded by all of their friends including quite a few from his college years and his days on the Farm.
High up above everyone was a large banner that read ‘Happy Birthday Michael’; off to a side was huge stack of presents and on the opposite wall was a large table loaded up with all sorts of food.

But Vaughn didn’t even notice any of that as soon as Sydney launched herself into his arms, beaming. “Happy birthday honey,” she murmured giving him a quick kiss.

A little while later, she gave him another surprise by leaning up to him and whispering that they were heading for Santa Barbara.

After the party, she directed him towards his car which Will had crammed their packed duffel bags and large bags of groceries into when Sydney had slipped him the keys, while Vaughn was too occupied to notice.

And now here they were, several hours later, celebrating a quiet evening alone. “Did you like your present?” Sydney asked him. Vaughn grinned. “Oh yeah.” She laughed, knowing that his sly expression had more to do with the 2nd gift she had given him.

Aside from the authentic L.A. Kings hockey stick autographed by his favorite players, her other gift had been a lacy white negligee… with her in it.

They snuggled closer to each other as their laughter died down, content with the silence and the warmth their embrace.

A moment later Vaughn cleared his throat lightly. "I know it's my birthday, but i have a surprise for you," he said as he moved on hand away from her body and reached into his pocket. Sydney pulled away from him, a suprised smile on her face as she sat up to face him. "You're kidding," she said.

Taking a deep breath he pulled out a small jewelry box, opened the top and presented it to her.
“Sydney Bristow, I love you more than I ever thought it was possible to love anyone. Will you marry me?” he asked softly.
 
A/N: The inspiration from this chapter came from the Evanescence song "My Immortal"... hope you like it!



CHAPTER THREE
(December 30, 2008)


His cell phone had been ringing incessantly for five minutes straight, but Vaughn made no move to answer it.

Lying flat on his back, with his hands folded behind his head and staring up at the ceiling, he continued to ignore the buzzing sound that was breaking the silence of his bedroom.


I’m so tired of being here
Suppressed by all my childish fears

And if you have to leave
I wish that you would just leave
Because your presence just lingers here
And it won’t leave me alone

These wounds won’t seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There’s just so much that time cannot erase



Without glancing at his watch, he knew that he was late, very late for work, by 3 hours at least. But he also knew that the person on the other end of the line wasn’t calling to inquire about where he was and whether or not he was coming into work today. Vaughn never asked for it, and he never acknowledged it, but for the past 6 years, everybody let him be on this particular day.


When you cried I’d wipe away all of your tears
You’d scream I’d fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
And you still held on me…



If he showed up for work, nobody would blink an eye as he went straight to business, strategizing, drawing up a plan of attack against a threat to national security, or taking a bullet during a complicated and often brutal mission of which
he was always the point man.


You used to captivate me with your resonating mind
Now I’m bound by the life you left behind
Your face it haunts
My once pleasant dreams
Your voice it chased away
All the sanity in me
These wounds won’t seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There’s just so much that time cannot erase



And if he stayed right where he was, choosing not to step out of his house the whole day, his friends at work, his boss or his secretary wouldn’t dare disturb him either.
Michael Vaughn was an excellent, dedicated agent. Everyone silently agreed that if he needed a day to himself, by damned he was going to get it.

Everyone except the person presently calling him. Unlike everyone else in his life, Jack Bristow never ceased to call on this day.

It was the only day of the year he refused to talk to his father-in-law. It didn’t matter though; he could already hear in his head exactly what Jack was going to say.

“Vaughn, it’s been 4 years, do you really think Sydney would ever be recognize the broken man you’ve become? You’re not dead, but you’ve stopped living with the rest of the world. She loved you and she knew how much you loved her. She would never blame you for what happened. Stop punishing yourself.”

Is that what everyone thought he was doing whenever he went out on a mission and did whatever it took to accomplish it? Even if it meant coming back home with a new injury or a scar as a result of getting himself nearly killed every week.


I tried so hard to tell myself that you’re gone
But though you’re still with me
I’ve been alone, I’m alone


No one understood that he didn’t want to live anymore. At least not the way they all thought he should.
His reputation showed a man who pulled out of every mission alive because he was smart, resourceful and fearless.

The truth was, he succeeded and ultimately survived because he went head first into every job and against every enemy, ready and unafraid to die simply because he had nothing left to lose.


You cried I’d wipe away all of your tears
You’d scream I’d fight away all of your fears
I held your hand through all of these years
You still held on me…



Jack was right about one thing. Sure, he wasn’t dead, at least not yet, but he wasn’t alive anymore either.
 
(December 30, 2004)

Vaughn groaned against Sydney’s mouth, feeling her lips curl up into a slightly smile as he did.
“Syd, you’re killing me here,” he muttered as he reluctantly pulled away from her.

One arm still wound around her neck, and the other gripped the steering wheel as Sydney gave him a sympathetic gaze and ran her hands lightly through his hair.

“Remind me again why you’re not going to hop out of this car and walk inside our house with me so that we can celebrate our wedding anniversary properly?” she inquired innocently.

Vaughn grimaced, but his eyes were soft as he answered her question. “Because Kendall’s a jack ass that can’t seem to handle another threat to national security by himself.”

The sound of Sydney’s laughter was enough to lighten up his mood considerably as his face cracked a lazy half grin. “I am seriously loving my change in careers right now,” she teased.

Vaughn grabbed her again and kissed her deeply. “You were saying?” he asked nonchantly when they pulled apart, noticing her dazed but happy expression.

“Something about how much you love me and how you can’t wait until I get home so we can spend the rest of the night making love,” Sydney said dreamily.

It was Vaughn’s turn to laugh. “I love the way your mind works Syd.” She gave him one last lingering kiss before opening her car door and stepping out.
“I love you Michael, drive safe,” she said blowing him a kiss.
“I love you too,” he answered with a grin before driving away.

Two hours later, Vaughn heading to his designated parking space already hitting number one on his speed dial.
Not only did the debrief feel like 2 days long, but for some reason he had a sinking feeling in his stomach.

It started out as something that felt like paranoia, but as the meeting progressed, he could feel himself growing more and more agitated by the minute.

“Hello?” Sydney asked pleasantly. Hearing her voice was enough to send a ripple of relief throughout his system, letting the worry lines on his forehead disappear.
“Hi, I’m on my way home,” he told her. “Good, I was getting lonely.” She paused. “Are you okay?”

Damn it, she knew he so well he couldn’t even try to hide something from her over the phone. “Yeah, I’m just anxious to get get home to my wife,” he admitted.

She chuckled. “Well, she misses you too, so you better hurry up and get here before she finds somebody new to fill the void,” she teased.

“Keep that up Mrs. Vaughn and you don’t get butter pecan as a snack tonight,” he threatened good-naturedly. Sydney paused, she hadn’t seen that one coming.

“With sugar cones?” she asked hopefully. “Like you’d eat it with anything else?” he asked with a laugh. “I’ll see you in a little while. I love you Syd.”

“Love you Michael.” He heard the hesitation in her voice and waited for her to continue.

“Come home soon, okay? I have something I need to share with you. Love you again. Bye.”

They hung up, and unlocked his car, a smile on his face moved to start the engine and then drove out of the parking lot, eager to get back to his wife.


****


The silence Vaughn heard as he walked up to the front steps leading to their front door, with the ice cream in hand, should have been his first clue.

Whenever Sydney was waiting up for him, she always had a CD playing in the background to help her stay awake or relax if he was coming back from a mission.

But there was nothing tonight. He chuckled to himself as he pictured rousing her from sleep with a bowl of butter pecan in his hand.
He fished out his keys and moved to unlock the front door, but found it already open.

Frowning slightly, he took a step inside… and dropped everything he was holding.

The living room was complete chaos.

The couch was overturned, lamps were broken, and the coffee table was smashed.
It took him a second to get over the shock of what he was seeing, and then he was on his feet again, running throughout the entire house, searching every room, calling out her name, and praying he’d find her behind every closed door.

He never did.

She wasn’t behind door in their house.

Nor was she behind any other door he opened over the past 4 years.
 
okay guys, as you can see i got quite a bit of work done here.

it's more like a reflection piece, but i'm thinking about continuing it into an actual story....

what to do you think? TBC or not TBC??
 
definetly tbc!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I CAN'T WAIT FOR MORE! :woot:

I love ALL of your stories they are amazing and so well written. :D :2love:
you are na amazing writer i wish i could just write like you! :rolleyes:

but compared to you i'am just an amateur..

update soon because you are killing me here ok? jgk :lol:

and please add me to all of your pm lists ok? for all of your fics including this one. ^_^

thanks for sharing your fics with us. :love:

kisses
anya
 
You better continue, because I want to know what happened to Syd!

Please, please, please, please, please continue, I'm begging you here.

Anyways, PM me when you do!

Wonderful beginning! (y)

-Nicole
 
Wow, this Story is really good. (y)

I love the flashbacks with Sydney.

Please put me to your PM list. Thanks ! Can´t wait for more. :woot:
 
Continue please! Both Noeele and I ::Noelle nods along:: reallytthink this is going great and would like to see what is going to happen. What's that Noelle? ::natie leans down and Noelle whipsers in her ear:: Oh yes, and I ::cough:: Noelle would like to know will this be a happy ending? ::Noelle and nattie look concerned:: :D
 
that was awsome story you could really tell how much they loved each other! :D Keep up the awsome writing could you pm when you write another part to your story!!!!!!
 
Your story with Syd and Michael married is great. Please continue it. I hope the program eventually makes it to this point for Syd and Michael. :cool:


Syd and Michael are awesome. :cool:

Would you send me a private message when the story is updated? Thank you
 
what's up guys... okay, you've convinced me!

i will continue with this story but like i said, it won't be a reflection piece anymore since it'll have to happen in the present which means no more flashbacks... i think!

i haven't decided yet, but i do have a new part to post! yipee!

thanks so much to all who reviewed, i love my readers!

here goes!
 
CHAPTER FIVE
(December 30, 2008)


The ringing hadn’t stopped for 15 straight minutes, and even if it didn’t bother him in the least, Vaughn knew that Jack Bristow’s stubbornness wasn’t anything that was going to dwindle anytime soon.
His daughter’s own streak, was enough evidence of such a thing.

“Hello Jack,” he answered, not even bothering to check the caller ID first. “Vaughn, we received some Intel as to where Sloane was last seen,” came the reply.

There was silence on Vaughn’s end as an image of the man who had destroyed his life can into his mind. “Where?” he demanded in a clipped tone. “Back California, he’s been spotted in Springville, Hartford and Rivendale, what he could possibly be doing there, I haven’t the faintest idea.”

Vaughn pressed his lips into a tight line, his mind already working a mile a minute. “If that town is small enough to be the middle of nowhere, it would the perfect place for him to disappear, provided this Intel is legit. Where did it come from?”

This time the brief silence came from Jack’s end as he cleared his throat. “Sydney’s mother.”


****

Almost 5 hours later, Vaughn was sitting in a brand new CIA issue car, waiting patiently as his laptop analyzed each of the faces that had appeared on a hotel security camera.

While it didn’t seem likely that Sloane would choose to reside in a hotel during his stay, it was concluded that the place was owned by Gerard Ludlow, a business man who ran both hotels and casinos.

It was also concluded that Ludlow had long since been investigated by the CIA for his ties to K-Directorate, a fact that a man like Arvin Sloane would know too.
He glanced at the laptop once more, still hard at work before he stepped out of his car to stretch and check in with Jack.

He was currently on the outskirts of Rivendale, his next stop if the search for Sloane in Hartford proved to be a dead end.
There were no other cars on the road, and save for the loud wind, there was complete silence too.


Until the bullets pierced through the back of his car and went right through his windshield, hitting him on the shoulder and in the stomach as he went down.

Somewhere near his head, he could hear the sound of Jack’s voice through his cell phone, calling out his name. And then there was silence. And then darkness.

****

Vaughn woke up with a sudden start, and immediately regretted it as the wound in his stomach was jostled. Groaning inwardly he ran a tentative hand over where it hurt the most. I was ambushed, he realized, the memories flashing in his mind. Irina set me up.

The knowledge of such a thing made him so angry he moved again suddenly, causing more pain and eliciting a real groan this time.

“Hey, easy, you could seriously hurt yourself,” came a soothing voice.
He blinked his eyes, adjusting to the sudden brightness of the room as a light switch was flicked on.

“Where am I?” he asked the plump, but pleasant faced middle-aged nurse beside him. She checked his IV bag and gave him a friendly smile as she answered.

“You sir, are in Rivendale. You were found shot and abandoned in the middle of the road and now you’re here at the Holy Trinity Hospital.” She stuck out her hand. “I’m Bess by the way, I’m your nurse,” she added.

Vaughn managed a tight-lipped smile as he concluded that this woman was telling the truth and definitely not a threat. “Hi Bess, I’m Michael Parks,” he answered, still remembering to use his alias. “How long have I been out? And how bad is it?” he asked with a wince as his shoulder began to throb.

“It’s January 5th, 2004 honey, you’ve been unconscious for almost 6 days. You’ve got a concussion, a cracked rib, a bullet hole in the stomach and in your shoulder, plus a serious amount of blood loss.” She grinned at him.

“All in all, I’d say you’ve either got 9 lives or someone up there really likes you,” she said pointing up at the sky, or more appropriately at the sky. “You’re lucky you ended up in Rivendale, the folks here are good people. Anywhere else in the world, and you’d be dead by now.”

You don’t know the half of it, he told her silently.

There was a knock at the door and without waiting for an answer, it slowly began to creep open.

A small head of brown hair peaked into the room, looked around and smiled widely at the people inside when he saw that the patient was awake. He couldn’t have been more than 4 or 5, and like most kids his age, he had a knack for being curious about anything and everything.

“Hi Bess! Hi Mister!” he greeted them as he walked in. Bess smiled at the little boy as he came up to take her hand.

“Matthew, this is Mr. Parks,” she said making the introductions.

Vaughn was staring at Matthew who was smiling at him, his mischievous eyes crinkling with delight. Oblivious to what Bess was thinking, the little boy stuck out his hand and introduced himself.

“Hi, my mom and I found you yesterday when we were driving back into town,” he explained. “You sure sleep a lot, I’ve been waiting for you to wake up for days!”

At his exclamation, Vaughn couldn’t help but chuckle. “Sorry buddy, I guess I needed a lot of rest. Thanks for helping me by the way,” he answered.

Matthew grinned. “You’re welcome, my mom always says it’s important to help people who can’t help themselves,” he said.

“That’s true Matthew, your mom sounds like a real smart lady, you should listen to her,” Vaughn said with a short nod. Bess clapped her hands together, signaling an end to this conversation.

“Matthew, Mr. Parks needs to rest right now, and I need to call Dr. Philips to check up on him, why don’t you and I go find your mom, she’s probably looking for you too.”

Matthew shook his head. “I don’t think so, Tommy’s still sick and my mom is talking to his mom outside his room.”

“I’ll be back in a few minutes Mr. Parks,” Bess said over her shoulder as she took Matthew by the hand and led him out. “So will I Mr. Parks!” Matthew called out in a loud whisper much to the chagrin of Bess.

Despite the direness of his situation, Vaughn couldn’t help but be amused at the child’s antics. He had could easily imagine the kid being a big, but well loved handful to his parents. For some reason he was reminded of himself growing up.

The thought made him grin, something he hadn’t done in a while.

A moment later, he closed his eyes and focused on what he needed to do. First was to make contact with Jack, or Weiss, let them know of what had happened, where he was and prepare for his next move.

Thinking wasn’t easy though, given the amount of drugs and painkillers that had been injected into his system.

He heard the creep door open again and smiled inwardly, thinking it was Matthew, back for another visit. The heaviness of his eyelids made them harder to open, but nevertheless, he did.

A face came into view, and he blinked a little to get a clearer view.

It was a woman with the most beautiful face he had ever seen.
The same face he had seen on every brunette he had encountered over the past 4 years. The same face he dreamt about whenever he slept.

“Sydney?” he choked out, he moved to sit up and reached out a hand for her, trying to make sure he wasn’t seeing things.
His sudden moved sparked stabs of pain everywhere in his body but he didn’t care. He had to make sure she was really there.

Without a moment’s hesitation, she was by his side holding him steady, her touch soothing and her smile comforting. “Hey there, it’s okay, you’re alright,” she said.

“My name’s Julia Thorne, my son Matthew and I were the ones who found you.”
 
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