First I would like to thanks to everyone for reviewing and commenting, and actually not being annoyed that I sent all you guys another PM, lol
but anyway what I am trying to say it thank you guys so very much, you are the people I write fics for!
Now I'll comment on your comments ...
I liked it too, very very much
QUOTE
“Be careful” Vaughn called after her but Sydney didn’t hear his words, they meant nothing to her anymore, after all he had gone back to her again, what did his words mean?
poor Sydney but she knows that Vaughn loves her although he's stupid for not breaking up with Lauren the minute Sydney came back
QUOTE
Sydney’s mind ran through the last couple of days, she couldn’t believe that he had pushed her under again, it was a cruel joke, to pull her out of the darkened water so she could breathe again only to plunge her under again.
this is so well written, it really describes how sydney must have felt
QUOTE
She watched her bullet enter Lauren,
this is exactly how the episode should have happened
QUOTE
He grinned at her, like a little school boy with his first crush. She nodded and smiled before they ran out of the club, to report what had happened to the CIA and move on with their lives together. They left Lauren and her betrayal behind, beginning to breathe again.
they're leaving together now they can be happy again and Lauren's dead
and the last sentence is really great
I totally loved it, it's really great
Thanks I was really trying to use better words like Cai's amazing entry, I saw hers and was like "Oh my god" how do you know all these words and then I decided I'd never be that good at using them so just to describe everything in very deep detail
At first I thought you killed Vaughn. I hate it when he gets killed. Any how I read on, and you really had Syd's anger at him pegged I think. Stupid man went back to the COW and then you up and killed Lauren! I really, really, really am happy that you killed Lauren and let Syd and Vaughn live. Thank you.
Thanks for the PM
Yeah I've read a lot where Vaughn or Syd is killed, and they are great cos of the way it describes their love for each other but I kinda wanted a happy ending and I wanted to describe her hatred for Lauren and Vaughn's betrayal rather than their love which is in basically every other fic I write, lol!
Granted lauren could die in a million different senarios and I would be cool with all of them.
That does not take away from the fact that this was well written and obviously well thought out.
I very much enjoyed it.
Thank you, I'm glad you enjoyed it! You won't believe this but I actually heard of the death fic on the same day I started writing this and I like posted it the next day, I mean I knew I wanted to kill Lauren but I didn't know how and then I suddenly remember the one scene that really annoyed me and the fact that Vaughn didn't believe her so I thought I'd change it to what I wanted the scene to be like and so that Vaughn didn't change like he did at the end of S3!
Lauran died, and syd and vaughn left together
great story
thanx for the pm
can't wait for more
Thanks and your welcome for the PM, I was kinda nervous Pming everyone like that, I thought people would like "OMG how annoying I can't believe she PMed me with another thing I don't wanna read!" :blush2: But I'm sorry to tell you that it's just a one parter but after the competition I might decided to make a sequel, but the point was that it would kinda go on like S4 does
wow that was really amazing.
QUOTE
it was Sydney; her soul was calling him to come back to her. He turned his head up to face her; she was beautiful even if she was dressed up as a Goth. She was his angel, his anchor, he didn’t know how he had survived so long without her, but he knew really that he had always had her, maybe not physically but emotionally they had always loved each other. She smiled at him and he smiled back. He let her repair his anger with her love. She outstretched an arm to him and he took it, standing up. He lent towards her, but she put up her hands stopping her.
i like that part the most because i really felt like i could see it
and wouldn't it have been nice if that happened on the show? lol
thanks for the pm!
Yeah it would have been nice, I mean the bit where she outstretches her arms that was based on a S2 episode - The getaway where they fight off kane's men and cos I'm sure that he was about to kiss her then but she kinda stopped him to hang up the phone! So yeah I thought it would be cool if I referenced that! Ok seriously I've said so much about the background that people must think I'm crazy, freaky writer who is obsessed with writing fics and everything! Eeek, I'm sorry I won't babble anymore .... (who am I kidding! lol)
great story good luck with the contest.
Thank you, I'm kinda hoping I might get a few votes, or do you guys not vote, eek oh no, that's not good, I'll come like last ... eek
This is my favorite Death Fic! You are the only one that I have read so far, that has killed Lauren. Everyone else has killed Syd, or Vaughn. I don't like it that way, your way is much better!
QUOTE
You have no idea what it's like to think you know someone, to love them, and then figure out it was nothing but lies.
Was this from the show? It sounds so familiar... I am trying to remember who said it and about what. I think it was Syd, but I just can't recall what she is referring to! Can you please PM me and let me know! Thanks!
Great job!
Megan
Aaww thank (god I am so blushing right now, lol
) but I gotta say that my lo-vely great friend Cai killed her too and her story is amazing, it so well written lol, this doesn't even compare! ^_^ Erm that was a quote from that episode, Lauren says it to Vaughn when she's packing to go to Dover, England for her dad's funeral, but of course she's not really going, she's going to Berlin, like he is and I just love that quote cos it's just so ironic and great cos she's actually betraying him and yet accusing him that he doesn't know when she's doing it to him and he doesn't even realise! I'll PM you if you like! I'll see if you come here first though
OMG sab!! thats powerful! I LOVE IT!! not only cus lauren was the one do die but because 1) the beginning rocked! you had me scared it was vaughn. and 2) the was you wrote it made it that much more real (can you say that much more?? it doesnt sound right ok back to reviewing lol) I LOVED THIS SAB and if someone doesnt then they are crazy! the last line i think was my fav. idk why i was just so powerful! GREAT JOB!! so glad i found out you wrote one (told ya in HR iam a little slow lol) ~lizzy
Oh wow, thanks
Thank so much lizzy! I can't believe people like it, it's amazing! I know I haven't been in HR very much but I'll go back soon and stay there, lol! Everyoen loves the last line but it was definetely the only bit off the story that I was unsure of, I mean I knew how I wanted it to be but I was like OMG how do I write this, you know? And then I just sorta settled for what I had written even though I knew it wasn't as good as the rest of it and then people love it better than the rest which is kinda shocking but ok, lol!
OMG that was soooo soooooo sooooooo soooooo
amazing, i loved it
whoa that was really good
thanks for the pm
Thanks, I'm glad you liked it, thanks for reviewing and taking the time to read!
I really liked it Sabby!
It was intense and powerful! i really felt like i was in the middle of the drama, right there watching Lauren die!
Awesome job
Thanks Tasha, It's nice hearing it from someone who's a great friend, thank you
Ok so I'll stop babbling now and leave you guys alone ... lol :blowup: Thanks for reviewing! Good luck to any of you who have decided to enter!
lool... great entry... read mine, if you want... (at the bottom of my sig: Wreck of the Day)